"Men Don't Know What They Want"

[OnyxSnowfall]

Well no physical contact whatsoever, and no contact in between dates (except to set up the next date.) So it'll be a date on Thursday, call on Monday to say "hey about X activity on Y day?" and then I won't hear from them until they show up at my door. And during the date, the guy is amusing and we have good conversation, but he very rarely remembers anything I mentioned on the last day, and doesn't really ask further questions about things I say. (We have good conversation because I try to ensure it's about him, 90% of the time.)

 

Perhaps that's how my current FWB hooked me. On top of making it clear he found me physically attractive, he always asks about my day, remembers things I've mentioned, and texts or calls me every day. Maybe these other guys are "relationship-minded," but when my FWB is out-relationshipping them, it says something.

 

So no physical contact, no connection between dates, and hardly any interest shown in me... The only thing that shows these guys were interested was that they showed up and they talked about themselves. I'd say I have good reason to think they're not interested, yes?

 

Yeah, I wouldn't waste time with those other men either. And I can see how your current FWB is confusing... especially against the stark contrast of those other dates.

 

It's really hard to say what the reasons might be --- probably things both in and out of your control and ones that even change based on external variables.

 

I'm not sure... sometimes life doesn't give us what we've been seeking until we stop. I don't know what the heck that's about, but before I met my current boyfriend, I had given up on ever being with someone who I could be happy with. Just, literally wiped the idea from my mind and focused on my interests. That didn't take away the loneliness, but I found it to be worse to be lonely while with company. Unproductive at best too.

 

If you invest into cultivating yourself more (if not just because you have the intellectual capacity), and if you can find a way to harness loneliness into some kind of expression (it may be a good time to try out different hobbies and things, even if they seem repulsive / off-putting. Cliche, but often times the hardest part to anything is indeed the first step) then perhaps it will just happen too. If for some reason it doesn't,

 

hopefully by then you'll have made peace with it anyway and you'll have more skills / ideas / abilities and things that will benefit YOU. And of course, any other people who are in your life.

 

It just sucks, I know.

[verhrzn]

Three's also the fact that she's dropping guys who don't make moves on her right away.

 

Sounds like there are some things she needs to stop and think about instead of just going straight into bitter mode.

 

Because, again, if they don't make a move, how the heck am I supposed to know if they're interested or just platonic friends? It's entirely possible that a guy asks me out to movies or dancing just because he wants another friend... and developing a crush on a person who sees you only in a platonic way is an even bigger time waster than an FWB (and a drama-creator if they integrate you into their social circle as well.)

[eatNrM]

Man, this thread has become quite detailed.

 

Let's see what I should respond with..

 

(This is MrNate by the way, my other account is being penalized until the next month:D long story)

[somedude81]

Because, again, if they don't make a move, how the heck am I supposed to know if they're interested or just platonic friends? It's entirely possible that a guy asks me out to movies or dancing just because he wants another friend... and developing a crush on a person who sees you only in a platonic way is an even bigger time waster than an FWB (and a drama-creator if they integrate you into their social circle as well.)

You should go back a few pages and read my previous post where I went into more detail.

 

And no, a guy won't ask you out to movies or dancing because he wants a new friend. The vast majority of men don't approach women with the intention of making friends.

 

We want sex, even though it might not be obvious right away.

 

The guys who don't try to grope you on the third date are just as horny as the ones who do. One is thinking about it, while the other just does it.

 

Another thing I'm starting to see about you; even though you complain a lot about how men don't want you, you seem to go on a lot of dates.

 

Here I was starting to think you were the girl who never gets asked out, and from what I've read, you've been out with at least four guys this year...

[verhrzn]

You should go back a few pages and read my previous post where I went into more detail.

 

And no, a guy won't ask you out to movies or dancing because he wants a new friend. The vast majority of men don't approach women with the intention of making friends.

 

We want sex, even though it might not be obvious right away.

 

The guys who don't try to grope you on the third date are just as horny as the ones who do. One is thinking about it, while the other just does it.

 

Another thing I'm starting to see about you; even though you complain a lot about how men don't want you, you seem to go on a lot of dates.

 

Here I was starting to think you were the girl who never gets asked out, and from what I've read, you've been out with at least four guys this year...

 

1) I don't get approached. These are guys either I've approached online, or I've met through friends/activities.

 

2) What exactly is your definition of a "date"? Cause, again, without physical contact, or someone straight up saying "This is a date/I am interested in dating you" (which none of them have) it is just as plausibly a platonic outing. I get dinner with my male friends; I go to movies with my male friends.

 

3) I was "casually seeing" a guy til April, when he dumped me for being ugly; I've had this FWB since July, and there have been two guys that I went to dinner/movies/plays with, neither of which ever made a move or gave me any indication they liked me as explained in a previous post. How can that possibly signal romantic success to you?

[somedude81]

1) I don't get approached. These are guys either I've approached online, or I've met through friends/activities.

That depends on what you define as an approach. Most men don't like going up to random women and starting a conversation, if that's what you consider an approach.

 

I have never asked out a girl that I didn't know through a class, work or social activity.

2) What exactly is your definition of a "date"? Cause, again, without physical contact, or someone straight up saying "This is a date/I am interested in dating you" (which none of them have) it is just as plausibly a platonic outing.

Of course you don't hear that. Do you really expect a guy to go up to you, "Hello, would you like to go on a date with me?" Even a guy who knows you through friends/activities won't use the word "date."

 

How do you know it's a date? Just assume it is.

 

Try this for a while. The next time a guy you don't know to well and isnt' an established friend invites you to do something with him, tell yourself this, "He is attracted to me, he wants me."

 

If by the second date a guy hasn't made a move, start talking about sexy stuff, let him know that it's OK. If he's not a total idiot, he'd start getting more aggressive

 

I get dinner with my male friends; I go to movies with my male friends.

That's because they are already established as platonic friends. Don't put new guys in the same category until after you're completely sure they have no interest in you.

 

 

3) I was "casually seeing" a guy til April, when he dumped me for being ugly; I've had this FWB since July, and there have been two guys that I went to dinner/movies/plays with, neither of which ever made a move or gave me any indication they liked me as explained in a previous post. How can that possibly signal romantic success to you?

I don't know that much about ugly guy. You've covered the FWB plenty and what's going on is your choice.

 

The other two guys, how much time did you give them? Did you ever try to talk about stuff like kissing and sex; flirting, joking or seriously?

 

Heh, I had a conversation about sex with a really shy/awkward/innocent girl after we played God of War together. She was playing and didn't want to do the sex-mini game to get extra orbs and I teased her a little bit for that. But when I was driving her home we were talking about the game and then she says, "I wonder what Kratos is like when having sex?" So we had our first sex conversation all thanks to the God of War

[verhrzn]

That depends on what you define as an approach. Most men don't like going up to random women and starting a conversation, if that's what you consider an approach.

 

I have never asked out a girl that I didn't know through a class, work or social activity.

Of course you don't hear that. Do you really expect a guy to go up to you, "Hello, would you like to go on a date with me?" Even a guy who knows you through friends/activities won't use the word "date."

 

How do you know it's a date? Just assume it is.

 

Try this for a while. The next time a guy you don't know to well and isnt' an established friend invites you to do something with him, tell yourself this, "He is attracted to me, he wants me."

 

If by the second date a guy hasn't made a move, start talking about sexy stuff, let him know that it's OK. If he's not a total idiot, he'd start getting more aggressive

 

That's because they are already established as platonic friends. Don't put new guys in the same category until after you're completely sure they have no interest in you.

 

 

I don't know that much about ugly guy. You've covered the FWB plenty and what's going on is your choice.

 

The other two guys, how much time did you give them? Did you ever try to talk about stuff like kissing and sex; flirting, joking or seriously?

 

Heh, I had a conversation about sex with a really shy/awkward/innocent girl after we played God of War together. She was playing and didn't want to do the sex-mini game to get extra orbs and I teased her a little bit for that. But when I was driving her home we were talking about the game and then she says, "I wonder what Kratos is like when having sex?" So we had our first sex conversation all thanks to the God of War

 

That is absolutely ridiculous... ASSUME a guy is interested in me? Do you have any idea what kind of problems and drama that causes down the road? I've "assumed" in the past, and then I've ended up hurt because the guy wasn't interested in me at all, and I've gotten told off for BEING hurt because the guy never actually told me he was interested. Isn't that the whole thing with the FWB... just because he acts like he likes me, I shouldn't ASSUME he actually does? And now you're telling me to just ASSUME random dudes like me? What the hell?

 

I am not just going to bust out the flirting/sexy talk when a guy has given no indication he likes me!! If I'm WRONG in my ASSUMPTION that he likes me, I end up coming across creepy, making him uncomfortable, and gaining a reputation as a slut/overly sexual.

 

But, of course, none of that matters to you, because all of your suggestions are just ways to lift all effort and responsibility off the guy. All he has to do is take me someplace, and wait for me to ASSUME and throw myself at him.

 

Did you miss the post about the guy I went to a movie with on Friday, who was complaining because so many women had done THAT EXACT THING? Here's what happens: if a guy doesn't like you that way, you become the creepy slut. If he doesn't like you that much, but has no qualms about casual sex, then hey he'll take advantage of it cause you're throwing yourself at him, and if he does like you, he would have already demonstrated it.

[somedude81]

And now you're telling me to just ASSUME random dudes like me? What the hell?

Yes, when a "random" dude asks you out or wants to take you somewhere, assume he likes you. That's a better mindset to have than assuming he doesn't.

 

I am not just going to bust out the flirting/sexy talk when a guy has given no indication he likes me!! If I'm WRONG in my ASSUMPTION that he likes me, I end up coming across creepy, making him uncomfortable, and gaining a reputation as a slut/overly sexual.

If you're on the 3rd date and nothing has happened yet, why not do it? I'm sure you're smart enough to do it in a subtle way that gets things going. What do you have to lose? You're going to drop him anyways.

 

But, of course, none of that matters to you, because all of your suggestions are just ways to lift all effort and responsibility off the guy. All he has to do is take me someplace, and wait for me to ASSUME and throw myself at him.

Ever thought about how much guts it takes to actually ask somebody out, especially if he is an awkward guy? Why not help a bit and give him some signs that you are interested in being more than friends?

Did you miss the post about the guy I went to a movie with on Friday, who was complaining because so many women had done THAT EXACT THING? Here's what happens: if a guy doesn't like you that way, you become the creepy slut. If he doesn't like you that much, but has no qualms about casual sex, then hey he'll take advantage of it cause you're throwing yourself at him, and if he does like you, he would have already demonstrated it.

Where was I telling you to throw yourself at a guy? From what he was saying, I'd think he be one of the guys who quickly makes moves on a girl. I wasn't talking about guys like him.

 

As for worrying about being called a creepy slut, once again you're assuming guys you're on dates with don't like you.

[verhrzn]

Yes, when a "random" dude asks you out or wants to take you somewhere, assume he likes you. That's a better mindset to have than assuming he doesn't.

 

 

If you're on the 3rd date and nothing has happened yet, why not do it? I'm sure you're smart enough to do it in a subtle way that gets things going. What do you have to lose? You're going to drop him anyways.

 

 

Ever thought about how much guts it takes to actually ask somebody out, especially if he is an awkward guy? Why not help a bit and give him some signs that you are interested in being more than friends?

 

Where was I telling you to throw yourself at a guy? From what he was saying, I'd think he be one of the guys who quickly makes moves on a girl. I wasn't talking about guys like him.

 

As for worrying about being called a creepy slut, once again you're assuming guys you're on dates with don't like you.

 

Except these aren't "random" dudes. They're guys who I'm introduced to through friends or activities. Which means they can just as easily see me as a potential friend instead of a potential girlfriend. How in the world do you think friendships start?

 

It's ridiculous to assume someone likes you romantically when they've given no indication they like you romantically. How is this a difficult concept to grasp? And I'm NOT gonna make a move/throw myself at a guy who doesn't seem interested. Talk about setting yourself up for disappointment.

[thatone]

It is women and children who suffer more financially due to divorce, not men.

 

Yes, the divorce rate is still 50%. But to correct the other statistic... It is 75% of divorces that are initiated by women.

 

90% of all divorces are initiated because of cheating. Not drugs, not abuse...

 

Most of the financial concerns would be taken care of by a good prenup. Most states are moving towards joint custody too, where neither gets primary. Of course, you could decide not to have children.

 

the bolded part is simply not true.

 

the bottom line is, the party who suffers more does not initiate a divorce.

[betterdeal]

I want a bacon sandwich, a million quid, and a Rolls Royce with flames down the sides. Real flames.

[verhrzn]

I want a bacon sandwich, a million quid, and a Rolls Royce with flames down the sides. Real flames.

 

*This thread is fresh out of magic lamps.*

[snowflakes88]

Not in my head

 

It is BS. You'd use timing as an excuse with the guy you went out with last night, but I bet you'd commit to Booty Call dude in a heartbeat. You know you would. "Wrong timing" always goes out the door for the right person.

[Titania22]

Could it really be impossible that there are not a lot of relationship-minded men out there (one man for every relationship-minded woman, at least), or perhaps that I'm not the kind of girl relationship-minded men look at and want? (I fully admit I'd make an awful wife... I can't cook, my cleaning habits are akin to a fairly tidy bachelor, and I'm awful at decorating. I really lack the "feminine" touch, as they say.) In the case that relationship-minded men just aren't attracted to you, then what?

 

This is how I feel. No man has ever looked at me and thought, 'she's the one, she's a keeper'.

 

And I know I was married, but he only married me because he felt the alternative was life imprisonment or death, and even then he took his time deciding what would be preferable.

 

the bolded part is simply not true.

 

the bottom line is, the party who suffers more does not initiate a divorce.

 

The line was suffer financial, not just suffers. I got away from my husband because he was abusive. Screw money in that case! He took everything of any value, and went after more.

[Jynxx]

Just read through 171 replies and the only one worth reading is the first one. Just saying.

[Nexus One]

You talk a big game about pulling things out of thin air but then you pull this and make up something that were never said. I *never* said you never focus on the positives in men.

 

Sure you didn't.

 

The world needs less men advocating that men are just dogs and can't be anything more and women shouldn't expect very much from them.

 

Nexus, you keep saying that your response is "tailored to help out verhrzn". Okay, then explain how telling her that most men cheat and most men just want to use women and throw them away helps her? This is like the third time I've asked you this. You've ignored it every time I've asked. This should be a relatively easy question for you to answer. Infact, you've ignored every question I've asked you.

 

 

 

You talk a big game about pulling things out of thin air but then you pull this and make up something that were never said. I *never* said you never focus on the positives in men. My focus is less on your ratio of "good man talk"/"bad man talk" and more about a popular cultural negative habit in both men and women of promoting men amounting to only the worst common denominator qualities.

 

I infact said many times now that I don't think you are a bad guy at all. But I do find your ideas about who men are harmful and immature toward men themselves. Promoting these "men are just dog" ideas helps no one. It's a immature mentality and it's sadly a popular one that both men and women cling to in their own immature understanding of one another. It allows for no growth in men when we unjustly say things like "oh this is just how men are." Wrong! This is not all men are. Men today are evolving along with women. And I hope that keeps progressing. The men of today are different then the men from 40 years ago. They engage in their relationships, their families and work differently.

 

I don't know how you've responded to other threads. But I don't really need to in the context of this conversation here. Oxy and I had it out in one thread because we didn't agree but where perfectly fine in other threads where we did agree.

 

In this thread, in the context of this conversation, I want to know how telling women that most men cheat and most men want to treat them like disposable items helps?

 

 

 

My opinion on your thoughts on this subject and the immaturity has nothing to do with our experiences being different.

 

 

 

 

Yeah, I never said that. What I did say is that there is this wrongly huge cultural fallacy that men are just "dogs". Telling women that most men cheat and want to use them and that's "just how it is" falls under the "men are just dogs" mentality. This belief system is immature. And it's also actually very anti-male. Because men are so much more then just that. Because there are good men. Premoting the idea that men are no better then "dogs" allows women to wallow in their hurt and not push through to understand men and make justifications on not giving men a real chance. It allows men to wallow in their personal self gratification and to not push through and be so much more then society tells them they can be with cultural attitudes like "most men cheat".

 

 

 

The discussion is turning petty because your more focused on yourself then you are the actual topic.

 

 

 

You should really take your own advice about saying things like "you said" when no such things were uttered. You just pulled a lot of nonsense with your "As" and "Bs" and "you saids" that had absolutely nothing with what I said.

 

You don't want people to judge you based on what you say. Further, you did say many men/most men are going to treat women badly. So I am baffled and don't see how you set anything "straight".

 

Almost all questions in your last post I already answered and I explained that you misinterpreted what I said and I quoted the text that demonstrated that. Yet you keep rehashing the exact same points again and you keep pulling the same sh*t out of thin air that I already showed I didn't say.

 

You can go find another s*cker and waste his time. I'm done with you DY. I don't feel like dissecting the exact same ant over again with you.

[OliveOyl]

The thing is... I don't get along with guys who like sports, and frankly, I'm not really the type sports-liking-guys want. I'm that girl who sits there during the Super Bowl and says," What just happened? What does that hand signal mean? What the hell is first and ten?" It's probably limiting my range of potential boyfriends, but "masculine" men who like sports, or fishing, or camping just... leave me cold.

 

Coming into this a bit late and I see the topic has wandered off from this... but I am NOT into sports (either playing or spectator) but that hasn't been a problem with both my ex (who enjoyed playing a fairly popular sport for many years, as well as watching others) nor my BF (who is a fishing/camping kinda guy). I'm the kind of gal who needs to be frequently reminded who is in the Superbowl this year. And it's not been a problem.

[betterdeal]

*This thread is fresh out of magic lamps.*

 

I know what I want.

[rafallus]

No.

 

If they weren't interest, why would they want to go on dates with you? Think about it...would you go on a date with a guy you weren't attracted to?

 

-To show off to their friends, how they are "ladies men", because they, uh, go on dates,

-To kill some time, because they're bored,

-Because they want to go to specific place anyway, and it doesn't make a difference, if it's alone or with a companion.

 

Three's also the fact that she's dropping guys who don't make moves on her right away.

Been dropped like that myself. After one date, no less.

 

Also, other time, even when I intentionally wanted to wait with "physicallities" and just get her hot with only words, I ended up proving to be completely inept at former, when it was presumably time to kick into higher gear.

 

Basically, girls reject guys like that for a reason, because I essentially wasted both mine and hers time (I ended up "friend-zoning" this specific woman).

 

If by the second date a guy hasn't made a move, start talking about sexy stuff, let him know that it's OK. If he's not a total idiot, he'd start getting more aggressive

Very far-fetched. More likely, he'll bite and start talking about it himself, with great enthusiasm, hoping, that all this talk will make her jump his bones on its own. If you don't establish strong physical contact throughout, it's not happening - never happened to me, anyway, and I don't know anybody, who did. Hollywood lied to you, dude - not the first, not the last, and not even the biggest time. Edited September 19, 2011 by rafallus

[ThsAmericanLife]

This is true. I have seen so many men who thought they had a great marriage only be hit out of the blue with their wife seeking a divorce who then proceeds to completely wreck his life.

 

Men deep down want relationships with women but many are terrified of going through this.

 

Check this out...

 

"Why Women Leave Men"

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8111_leave.html

[ThsAmericanLife]

Nexus, you keep saying that your response is "tailored to help out verhrzn". Okay, then explain how telling her that most men cheat and most men just want to use women and throw them away helps her? This is like the third time I've asked you this. You've ignored it every time I've asked. This should be a relatively easy question for you to answer. Infact, you've ignored every question I've asked you.

 

 

 

You talk a big game about pulling things out of thin air but then you pull this and make up something that were never said. I *never* said you never focus on the positives in men. My focus is less on your ratio of "good man talk"/"bad man talk" and more about a popular cultural negative habit in both men and women of promoting men amounting to only the worst common denominator qualities.

 

I infact said many times now that I don't think you are a bad guy at all. But I do find your ideas about who men are harmful and immature toward men themselves. Promoting these "men are just dog" ideas helps no one. It's a immature mentality and it's sadly a popular one that both men and women cling to in their own immature understanding of one another. It allows for no growth in men when we unjustly say things like "oh this is just how men are." Wrong! This is not all men are. Men today are evolving along with women. And I hope that keeps progressing. The men of today are different then the men from 40 years ago. They engage in their relationships, their families and work differently.

 

I don't know how you've responded to other threads. But I don't really need to in the context of this conversation here. Oxy and I had it out in one thread because we didn't agree but where perfectly fine in other threads where we did agree.

 

In this thread, in the context of this conversation, I want to know how telling women that most men cheat and most men want to treat them like disposable items helps?

 

 

 

My opinion on your thoughts on this subject and the immaturity has nothing to do with our experiences being different.

 

 

 

 

Yeah, I never said that. What I did say is that there is this wrongly huge cultural fallacy that men are just "dogs". Telling women that most men cheat and want to use them and that's "just how it is" falls under the "men are just dogs" mentality. This belief system is immature. And it's also actually very anti-male. Because men are so much more then just that. Because there are good men. Premoting the idea that men are no better then "dogs" allows women to wallow in their hurt and not push through to understand men and make justifications on not giving men a real chance. It allows men to wallow in their personal self gratification and to not push through and be so much more then society tells them they can be with cultural attitudes like "most men cheat".

 

 

 

The discussion is turning petty because your more focused on yourself then you are the actual topic.

 

 

 

You should really take your own advice about saying things like "you said" when no such things were uttered. You just pulled a lot of nonsense with your "As" and "Bs" and "you saids" that had absolutely nothing with what I said.

 

You don't want people to judge you based on what you say. Further, you did say many men/most men are going to treat women badly. So I am baffled and don't see how you set anything "straight".

 

This dialogue is getting old.

[ThsAmericanLife]

Perhaps that's how my current FWB hooked me. On top of making it clear he found me physically attractive, he always asks about my day, remembers things I've mentioned, and texts or calls me every day. Maybe these other guys are "relationship-minded," but when my FWB is out-relationshipping them, it says something.

 

Good point...

[thatone]

Check this out...

 

"Why Women Leave Men"

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8111_leave.html

 

and from a man's perspective, i picture every one of those complaints coming from women who have put zero effort into attaining those things, but rather just sit around expecting them and then pout when they don't happen.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Nexus

They want p*ssy. (I don't care if you find that offensive, that's how those guys think about it, they want sex and not a relationship

)

 

All you need to say is that certain men want sex and not a relationship. You don't have to keep calling women "p*ssy" and justifying it because of what "other men" do or think. It's hypocrtical. You justify your dialogue about women on the backs of other men. At least own your own personal contribution to keeping certain dialogue of women alive and well.

 

 

 

"Sure you didn't.

 

Almost all questions in your last post I already answered and I explained that you misinterpreted what I said and I quoted the text that demonstrated that. Yet you keep rehashing the exact same points again and you keep pulling the same sh*t out of thin air that I already showed I didn't say.

 

You can go find another s*cker and waste his time. I'm done with you DY. I don't feel like dissecting the exact same ant over again with you.

 

This response, coupled with several others you've made is what have lead me to my conclusions about you.

[ThsAmericanLife]

Whoa whoa whoa, how the heck am I dating him?? I didn't realize having dinner (which I paid for, natch) and/or seeing a movie meant I was dating someone. Otherwise, WOW, I've been dating my friends without even realizing it! I said I found him attractive, and we went and saw a movie.

 

I really don't see how it's hypocritical to date around (again, not quite sure what you qualify as "dating") when I'm not committed to a guy. A guy doesn't just automatically get my loyalty and respect just for asking me to a movie, and he doesn't earn exclusive rights to my lady parts just because he utters the phrase "looking for a serious relationship."

 

If a guy wants me to stop seeing/sleeping with other people, then he better be prepared to offer me a commitment. Someone who is at best a casual stranger does not get to dictate what I do in my personal life. If a guy is just so very offended that he's not my only option when he hasn't even asked me to be his girlfriend, he can go find himself a innocent co-dependent who will happily latch onto him just because he presents himself to her.

 

Your logic just doesn't make sense. The whole point of dating before getting into a serious relationship is to get to know if you even want to enter into a serious relationship. If I know that about a guy right off the bat (I'd have to, to be willing to cut out all other prospects) then why the heck am I wasting time with the dating, let's just get straight to the relationship! But then, how can I possibly tell if a guy is worth a relationship if I never go on a few dates with him?

 

Sorry, that attitude just smacks of slut-shaming, and the idea that a woman should make a man (apparently even a man who hasn't agreed to be serious with her yet) the center of her world before he actually demonstrates he's worth it.

 

It might sound like 'slut-shaming' because it is coming from a man...

 

But I would not go on a date with a man I knew was boning other women. I would not date a man who had a FWB either... because to ME that means he is ok just using women for sex... and (poor him) can't find a way to enjoy his time alone. Not all men (or women) with 'options' feel the need to exercise them.

 

I'm going to take back what I said before...

 

I think you enjoy having a FWB or being a FWB just a bit too much... once you are ready to kick that 'habit'... then I'll take you seriously about wanting a relationship.