ryokia123 Posted May 12, 2004 Share Posted May 12, 2004 I have a problem, and I don't know how I should go about this. A guy moved into my street, he introduced himself and we started talking a few times. After knowing him for a few months I start to realize that I have feelings for him. But the problem is we aren't really close friends, we are only neighbours in a way. and everytime I talk to him is only online. I never really got a chance to talk to him in person. Plus, I'm more of a shy person. So eventhough my friends tell me to go over to him and start talking to him, that I know I don't have the courage to. Talking online after realizing that I have feelings for him was not easy either. I feel like I have to force myself to think up topics to chat about. He does message me once or twice initiatively, but if all we do is talk once a while online, I don't see this going anywhere. I feel like I've already fallen into a hole. I don't want to let myself keep falling cuz what if there's no chance at the end? At the same time, I can't get myself back out of the hole. It's too late, once I like someone then I will not give up until I get a direct answer from that guy. Him and I are 3 years apart. Which is alright, and age difference never really matters. He's a very nice guy, easy to talk to. But I found out that he will be leaving for Denmark to study as an exchange student. He'll be gone for 6 weeks! Should I tell him how I feel before he leaves? but I dont' want to rush anything. I'm so lost as you can probably tell. I have no idea on what step to take next. Please, Please give me some advice!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Bobbie Posted May 12, 2004 Share Posted May 12, 2004 I feel like I've already fallen into a hole. I don't want to let myself keep falling cuz what if there's no chance at the end? At the same time, I can't get myself back out of the hole. It's too late, once I like someone then I will not give up until I get a direct answer from that guy. when we obsess about someone until we 'fall in love' before we even properly meet or know them, it's a recipe for pain: firstly, because we're convincing ourselves of reciprocal feelings we don't know are there, we've already lived out a whole relationship scenario in our mind, second because even if they are interested, how can a real person live up to a fantasy one. Fantasy is fine to fill in the gaps in our romantic life, but it's not a substitute for relationships. If you want a direct answer call/ email/ text him and ask. If it seems like too big a deal already, you maybe have some issues to work on? This is a great website for looking at black and white thinking and other self-defeating beliefs http://www.rational.org.nz/public/BeliefsQuestionnaire/bel4.htm Link to post Share on other sites
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