I have feelings for a guy, but I don't know what step to take next.

[ryokia123]

I have a problem, and I don't know how I should go about this. A guy moved into my street, he introduced himself and we started talking a few times. After knowing him for a few months I start to realize that I have feelings for him. But the problem is we aren't really close friends, we are only neighbours in a way. and everytime I talk to him is only online. I never really got a chance to talk to him in person. Plus, I'm more of a shy person. So eventhough my friends tell me to go over to him and start talking to him, that I know I don't have the courage to. Talking online after realizing that I have feelings for him was not easy either. I feel like I have to force myself to think up topics to chat about. He does message me once or twice initiatively, but if all we do is talk once a while online, I don't see this going anywhere.

 

I feel like I've already fallen into a hole. I don't want to let myself keep falling cuz what if there's no chance at the end? At the same time, I can't get myself back out of the hole. It's too late, once I like someone then I will not give up until I get a direct answer from that guy.

 

Him and I are 3 years apart. Which is alright, and age difference never really matters. He's a very nice guy, easy to talk to. But I found out that he will be leaving for Denmark to study as an exchange student. He'll be gone for 6 weeks!

Should I tell him how I feel before he leaves? but I dont' want to rush anything. I'm so lost as you can probably tell. I have no idea on what step to take next.

 

Please, Please give me some advice!!!

[Bobbie]

I feel like I've already fallen into a hole. I don't want to let myself keep falling cuz what if there's no chance at the end? At the same time, I can't get myself back out of the hole. It's too late, once I like someone then I will not give up until I get a direct answer from that guy.

 

when we obsess about someone until we 'fall in love' before we even properly meet or know them, it's a recipe for pain: firstly, because we're convincing ourselves of reciprocal feelings we don't know are there, we've already lived out a whole relationship scenario in our mind, second because even if they are interested, how can a real person live up to a fantasy one.

 

Fantasy is fine to fill in the gaps in our romantic life, but it's not a substitute for relationships.

 

If you want a direct answer call/ email/ text him and ask.

 

If it seems like too big a deal already, you maybe have some issues to work on? This is a great website for looking at black and white thinking and other self-defeating beliefs http://www.rational.org.nz/public/BeliefsQuestionnaire/bel4.htm