missed_theboat Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 I have known people who have dated for years upon years with no intentions of getting married. I have a German "sister" (she was our exchange student when I was 8, so I think of her as family), who has been dating her boyfriend for years and they live together with no intentions of matrimony. I also know people who get married 6 months in, just for the hell of it. Then, there's the people who get pregnancy and get married either immediately (before the baby is born) or raise their child together for a few years before tying the knot. I'm just wondering about your experiences. How long did you wait--what motivated you to take the plunge? Was there a time it just felt right? Link to post Share on other sites
Linda9999 Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 We met in December, didn't start dating till May, didn't have sex till October, and didn't get married for another 5 years. We lived together for 3 years before getting married. He was the one who took it so slow. I was a single mom with 3 small kids so he wanted to be very sure. I also wasn't going to jump into anything, considering the kids. I was sure before he was, though, by maybe a year. Link to post Share on other sites
make me believe Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 We were engaged after a year, and married about 7 months after that. Neither of us wanted to wait any longer. We started talking about our future after three months, but we weren't crazy enough to get married that soon! Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 We had dated for a year, and were engaged for six months after that before we were married. Still married and going strong after many years. I think it takes at least a year to really get to know someone before you can make that kind of permanent, life-long decision. Link to post Share on other sites
Author missed_theboat Posted September 23, 2011 Author Share Posted September 23, 2011 My guy and I have been together a year and talked about our future for a while now. We are moving in together this weekend. He just made a comment in the car the other day, saying he thinks that in a year from now, we'll probably be married, or at least headed towards that. It makes me happy to think--but wow! I've never thought it'd be so soon! I'm only 22 (going on 23). Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 My guy and I have been together a year and talked about our future for a while now. We are moving in together this weekend. He just made a comment in the car the other day, saying he thinks that in a year from now, we'll probably be married, or at least headed towards that. It makes me happy to think--but wow! I've never thought it'd be so soon! I'm only 22 (going on 23). I was 19 when I got married. My husband was 26. It's more a matter of maturity level than age that determines when you are old enough to get married. My nephew was 21 when he married his high school sweetheart. After seven years of marriage, they are going strong. My oldest son was 23 and his wife was 23 when they married. They are now 26 and have a great relationship. Some people are marriage material, and are stable, and are emotionally mature enough for a serious commitment at that age. When you meet the right one, you often don't want to wait, and are ready to make that kind of commitment. Link to post Share on other sites
Author missed_theboat Posted September 23, 2011 Author Share Posted September 23, 2011 My guy is 25 (going on 26); we're exactly three years and three days apart. He's very mature for his age; most people think he's older. My parents got married when my mom was 18 and my dad 23. But, then again, they were pregnant, so... hehe. But, they're still going strong (which is rare for any marriage, let alone one spurred by a pregnancy)! I wouldn't mind getting married young--at the same time, most of the people I talk with are of the mindset to get married in your late 20s, early 30s, so it's just interesting. Who knows what may happen. I'm just happy to date right now and see how it goes. I'm in no real hurry. Just wondered about other experiences, and what people think. Link to post Share on other sites
Avihenda Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 (edited) We were together four years before the engagement and five when we married. We knew in the third year that it was meant to be and had discussed marriage at that point. For the first two (great as they were) we were just getting used to one another and enjoying our time together. Time line wise, I don't think it's a good idea to set expectations really. The time is right when it is. No clock or calendar is going to make that change. I don't really say it's a "maturity" issue as some others do. I say it's a person issue; when you meet that person; you know. It could happen at 18 or 42. You are ready when you are ready. lol. Best wishes! Edited September 23, 2011 by Avihenda Link to post Share on other sites
bosunmate Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 My wife and i moved in together three weeks after meeting. Then two and a half months later we married. We just celebrated our 39th year together and for anyone wondering she wasn't pregnant, we waited three years to have children.... Link to post Share on other sites
Eve Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 Met in September, intimacy began in December. Moved in with him shortly afterwards, married in July of the next year. No babies involved. Take care, Eve x Link to post Share on other sites
Citizen Erased Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 We met March 2010, married June 2011. I'm 23, he is 30. Link to post Share on other sites
Author missed_theboat Posted September 23, 2011 Author Share Posted September 23, 2011 I didn't mean to assume people only married early if babies were involved. Clearly, people are in love and ready to begin their lives together! My parents may have taken the plunge to get married because a baby was involved, BUT they are very dedicated and loved each other anyway--regardless. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 Well, we waited a few years to have children. We were both college students at the time we married, living on my husband's part-time income. We wanted to both establish careers and have a stable income before starting a family. I also think a couple needs a few years in a marriage before they bring children into it. Link to post Share on other sites
bosunmate Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 I didn't mean to assume people only married early if babies were involved. Clearly, people are in love and ready to begin their lives together! My parents may have taken the plunge to get married because a baby was involved, BUT they are very dedicated and loved each other anyway--regardless. I only added the baby statement because when my wife and i got married in 1972 after being together only 3 months alot of people thought that. Having just spent 5 years in the Navy i was more then ready to settle down.... Link to post Share on other sites
denise_xo Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 About five months. We rushed it for cultural reasons. Link to post Share on other sites
sunshinegirl Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 Met in June '09, started dating Oct '09, engaged May '10, married Oct '10. We're a bit older (35 and 37 when we met) and we knew pretty quickly that we wanted to be together. Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 Met in September '06, starting dating right away. Got engaged in May '09, married in September '10. We just celebrated our 1 year anniversary. We were together 4 years before getting married. I was in graduate school for 2 years and we lived together for 3 years before getting married. Link to post Share on other sites
allina Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 We started dating when we were 23 and 26, moved in after 6 month of dating, got engaged after close to 3 years of dating, got married after 4 years of dating, just celebrated 1 year of marriage and now trying for a baby. Link to post Share on other sites
MoreRedemption Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 Got married 1 year after meeting in a nightclub. I know of a woman who married a husband 2 weeks after meeting him. Fast forward 15 and they are still happily married! Link to post Share on other sites
sunshinegirl Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 Got married 1 year after meeting in a nightclub. I know of a woman who married a husband 2 weeks after meeting him. Fast forward 15 and they are still happily married! Nice! How long have you been married, MR? You beat H and I - we were married 1 year 5 months after meeting @ a BBQ. We're coming up on our first anniversary with baby #1 on the way! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts