Fishhunter_00 Posted May 12, 2004 Share Posted May 12, 2004 My wife left me 2 months ago. She told me that she was unhappy in our marriage and needed some time apart to sort her feelings. We have a 2.5 year old child that she has taken with her. Her family has contacted me and told me that they think that she is making a HUGE mistake and to try and wait for her. I talked to her today and she told me that reconcillation was out of the question and that I should move on with my life. She is young (21), and I just think that she feels that trapped as being a mother and a wife. She is staying with her mom and dad, so I am not worried about the childs safety. I feel as if I am at a crossroads here. Her family is telling me to give her time, but she is saying that I should move on. I want my family back, and I know what I did to cause her unhappiness. Should I wait for her, or move on? Sorry for the rambling thread, but I have alot on my mind.. Link to post Share on other sites
sportsloving Posted May 12, 2004 Share Posted May 12, 2004 Take care of yourself. Move forward with your life, and if in the future she decides or makes up her mind about what she really wants, perhaps it will be you. But you must keep in mind that you are going to have to build your life without her in the event that she doesn't ever want to get back together. Devote yourself to your child and may you be granted all of lifes blessings. Good Luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Crazy_Beautiful Posted May 12, 2004 Share Posted May 12, 2004 You need to give her all the time and space she needs to sort through her feelings. If you meet someone you would like to hang out with, don't be afraid to. Try, key word, try to live as normally as you can. If or when she is ready, she will come back to you. There are still wonderful opportunities for your life out there, and if she was the one you were meant to be with, you will be together once again. Link to post Share on other sites
jimmz Posted May 12, 2004 Share Posted May 12, 2004 sportslover hit it right on. you need to lessen her impact in your life. do everything else you have going on in your life. maybe she'll come around, maybe she won't. when she says it's time to move on, it is time to move on. so, move on, maybe she'll catch up to you. Link to post Share on other sites
KirkCamp Posted May 16, 2004 Share Posted May 16, 2004 I agree in moving on but at the same time, be a good man and let her know you're there for her if she needs it as a friend and realize you still might be rejected. Easier said then done but realistically, don't close yourself off from the world because you don't deserve that form the sound of things. Maybe she is telling you to move on because she doesn't think she can sort out her problems, maybe she is just not sure about anything at the moment with being a young mother and all. I think it's unfair for her to tell you "there's no chance", though - I think if you look at it, a marriage where someone makes up both your minds about something this important is someone who clearly doesn't understand what marriage should be all about in the first place. Just my opinion but I was divorced after my ex wife went to a therapist who told her divorce would solve all her problems (that's what she's said anyway) so I tend to not like it when one person makes a decision for two Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted May 16, 2004 Share Posted May 16, 2004 Definitely give it time. Things were rushed, it seems, married with a kid and she's only 21. That's never easy on anyone. But, don't sit around moping, waiting for the phone to ring. The fact that she thinks you should move on isn't really good news, but she COULD come around. Don't expect it to happen, but don't shut out the possibility. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fishhunter_00 Posted May 28, 2004 Author Share Posted May 28, 2004 I was thinking last night....I have been reading all these post here and there seems to be a lot of people in the same situation as I. I think we all have a lot in common. The only problem is that I never see any success(spouse coming back home) stories. Is this a hopeless struggle that we are engaged in? Shouldn't I just give up on my wife and move on with my life? I know that God hates divorce, but I also know that I can't make my wife feel a certain way. I have been praying every night for God to bring my family back to me, and to also give me peace in my heart. Every time I talk to her about us, she tells me the same thing, she isn't even considering coming back home. I guess my question is this, do they ever come back home? If so, do they stay? Your responses will be welcomed.. Link to post Share on other sites
Wolvesbaned Posted May 29, 2004 Share Posted May 29, 2004 Fishhunter_00, I was thinking the exact same thing - has anyone actually come back home? Perhaps if they did they wouldn't be posting here anymore but on the Marriage forums? Anyway, I'm curious and I'll start a new post on both ... we shall see. Link to post Share on other sites
zoomer Posted May 29, 2004 Share Posted May 29, 2004 From what she is saying right now, she will not come home. If you move on....Find someone else...THEN she will want to come back ! Maybe not....but if she will WANT to come back, that's when it will be. It just may be too late for her though. Unfortunate for your child. Just be there for your child and keep him/her priority in your life. Good Luck and I wish you the best. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts