Drop Dead Fred Posted May 12, 2004 Share Posted May 12, 2004 I've been trying to date this girl who calls me all the time, but she never calls me when she says she will. I'm not really sure how to tell her, so last night I finally decided to tell her how I felt while I was at work (had my cell phone on me) (she was at work too, different place though). I texted her "I'd like you to know that you're all I ever think about =) (I hope this doesn't scare you away) =)" and she replied with "Why is that?" So I sent "Because you're the most interesting person I've ever met and I'm afraid of doing/saying the wrong things" "And every time you don't call when you said you will I feel like I've done something wrong to scare you..." no reply to that so I sent this about 20 minutes later "Can I call you tonight or did I screw up for real this time?" About 10 minutes later she calls, but I can't answer because I'm at work, so I send "I can't talk, I'm still at work. Don't know when I'll be done. Maybe before 10." and I call about 30 minutes later when I get out of work (she's at work still), no answer. I call again at 5 after 11, when she usually gets out of work, no answer either. Around 11:30 I sent a text saying "Don't leave me hanging please. Tell me what you're feeling" and she replies with "Can't talk call you tomorrow" And I haven't heard a thing since. We've only been on one date... did I screw up? We've known each other for 8 months and we talk like 3 times a week. Link to post Share on other sites
Azaroth Posted May 12, 2004 Share Posted May 12, 2004 I have dated a lot of girls, and it seems once you let the cat out of the bag that you like them, too soon - they will move on... Most of the time you need to give out little information as possible, and let them come to you and make the effort... Did you screw up? I don't know - she could have been busy at work, but she called you... as soon as you asked the last txt msg.. So? Maybe, it was agood or bad... Who knows? But if you messed up, you seem like a nice guy- and you shouldn't get down about it, there are plenty of girls out there... And it sucks being the nice guy, and you put more work into relationships then most... but sooner or later a girl will come around and appreciate it.. You have nothing to loose, if she is not intrested... But for future reference, don't say anything unless spoken to you... and when spoken to about it - don't give straight answers unless it's a no... That's the rule of thumb with girls, once they know they have you majority of the time they will play games with you.. or just loose interest Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted May 13, 2004 Share Posted May 13, 2004 Gee, a fellow named WWDWDDWW or some such thing has a similar problem. We keep telling him to drop this gal and find himself a real relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
SouthernRomeo Posted May 13, 2004 Share Posted May 13, 2004 I agree be the chasee and not the chaser. I've found many times on top of many times, the more you pursue the more they run. The more you ignore them, the quicker they come running. The same goes for both sexes (so the ladies don't think I'm being sexist =P ). Don't get yourself worked up too much. Just let things come. It's hard to just sit back when that person consumes your thoughts. Puppy love or budding love has a strong chemical pull on a person. Good luck to you. You do sound good hearted. If she's gone she's gone. Move on and try the cat and mouse tactic one time, you'll see. Link to post Share on other sites
LILUIL Posted May 13, 2004 Share Posted May 13, 2004 opinions on this.... what if both parties wanna be the mouse and waiting for the cat to come. I procrastinate, you procrastinate and end of the day, like me, i would give in and call. silence is deafening.... we'd never know that the other party might be waiting for us to call as the 'reassurance sign' comments....... Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted May 13, 2004 Share Posted May 13, 2004 what if both parties wanna be the mouse and waiting for the cat to come. I procrastinate, you procrastinate and end of the day, like me, i would give in and call. silence is deafening.... we'd never know that the other party might be waiting for us to call as the 'reassurance sign' EXACTLY!!!!!!! Which is why this 'be the chasee' thing is nutso. There are fellows who need to know that their attentions are wanted before they make a move. If a gal has come across a fellow who seems to be a truly great guy, it is insanity and then some to sit and wait for the guy to make a move to the point where the opportunity passes. There's a huge difference between pursuing someone relentlessly and making it known that you would be pleased if a fellow would make your acquaintance. Link to post Share on other sites
Drop Dead Fred Posted May 13, 2004 Share Posted May 13, 2004 Originally posted by moimeme Gee, a fellow named WWDWDDWW or some such thing has a similar problem. We keep telling him to drop this gal and find himself a real relationship. Got any links? I don't see that name anywhere on the site. Maybe he can offer some insight. Link to post Share on other sites
Drop Dead Fred Posted May 13, 2004 Share Posted May 13, 2004 Anyway, she called while I was at work, so I could only talk to her for 20 seconds; said she would call back either last night if she could (she didn't) or today. So we'll see I guess. I think maybe I'm freaking out over nothing; last month I told her I thought she was beautiful and smart and would love more than anything in the world to date her, and that only made her call even more frequently. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts