1Dunno Posted September 26, 2011 Share Posted September 26, 2011 I know my breakup is way past the rationalisation and justification phase, but based on the actions of my ex after our breakup, she is definitely a serial monogamist, no questions asked. I’m furious at myself for not recognising the warning signs. In hindsight they were all there, I just chose to ignore them. Telling me that she wasn’t sure if she wanted anything serious. But then leading me on to asking to meet my parents etc. I understand that it changes nothing now. But now I feel worthless, like what we had meant absolutely nothing to her at all. Now I’m just another one on her list of ex’s. Just another number. The way she’s treated me has shown no consideration for my feelings at all. Was it really all just for nothing? Did she waste those few months of my life, just to have me grieving now? Link to post Share on other sites
IfiKnewThen Posted September 26, 2011 Share Posted September 26, 2011 i am sorry you are going through this. i know that worthless feeling. they treat you so cold and indifferently. its enough to make you feel low like that. but tyoure not low. and they should never make it feel like that. i dont care what you did, or didnt do, its just plain wrong of them, when all is said and done. especially if people are genuinely sorry too. if they thought they did wrong....and said so. and then if the dumper still makes you feel bad . it doesnt have to end badly. and people who lead people on are insecure and immature and selfish. we all make mistakes though. but that doesnt make us worthless, we cant measure our worth solely by them. so many others would find worth in us and you have to find worth and value in yourself. i didnt read your back story, i just wanted to respond and tell you....getting dumped makes us feel worthless, but that is false and not a truth. things dont always go our way. they decided to treat us differently. and when its bad it sux royal. but we are not worth that treatment and are worthy of love and have value. Link to post Share on other sites
Thieves Posted September 26, 2011 Share Posted September 26, 2011 But now I feel worthless, like what we had meant absolutely nothing to her at all. Now I’m just another one on her list of ex’s. Just another number. The way she’s treated me has shown no consideration for my feelings at all. I feel like that, too. Not necessarily worthless, but... unimportant. It's not a real cozy feeling to have, believe me I know. I just get the feeling that I might've just been a distraction for the time, mind you a pretty good one, more than anything else. A 'phase'. It hurts to think about that. Was it really all just for nothing? Did she waste those few months of my life, just to have me grieving now? And in retrospect, it wasn't all completely wasted. Now you know to truly look out for those 'red flags', right? Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1Dunno Posted September 26, 2011 Author Share Posted September 26, 2011 we cant measure our worth solely by them. so many others would find worth in us and you have to find worth and value in yourself. i didnt read your back story, i just wanted to respond and tell you....getting dumped makes us feel worthless, but that is false and not a truth. things dont always go our way. they decided to treat us differently. and when its bad it sux royal. but we are not worth that treatment and are worthy of love and have value. Thankyou for your great reply. I guess I would be happier to move on if I just had some confidence that she actually had feelings for me. But I guess the old addage "don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to" applies here. And in retrospect, it wasn't all completely wasted. Now you know to truly look out for those 'red flags', right? Yes, very true. I just really hope that I remember all the hurt that she has caused me in the future so that I'm not destined to be with someone who only intends to use me as a "stop gap". Link to post Share on other sites
Bruised Not Broken Posted September 26, 2011 Share Posted September 26, 2011 The other responses were dead on. I know feeling worthless all too well, but I am refusing to let that feeling suck me down...and you should too. If you are just one in a chain of people she has done this too, you are a victim, just as a rape victim isn't worthless...neither are you. YOu have worth beyond your imagination. And...when we learn to accept and cherish ourselves and our worthiness, only then will we find someone to value us as we should be valued. I hope you start to feel better soon....I hope I start to feel better soon actually Hang in there...each day does get us closer to healing. Link to post Share on other sites
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