A7X Posted September 27, 2011 Share Posted September 27, 2011 Alright so I'm closing in on 1 month since my ex dumped me. I had a really hard time at the beggining, thankfully I was able to make a new friend at work that happens to be a pretty hot chick and she helped me threw everything with her friendship and advice. I have good days where the world is there for the taking and other days where I keep asking myself where everything went wrong. I keep thinking back of our good memories and it makes me smile, then I think of everything that happened right after and during the breakup and it tears me apart. So as the title says, she's always on my mind. I've been NC for almost 3 weeks now, I've been tempted to contact her since she unblocked me from FB yet resisted. I deleted her email and phone number so I wouldn't contact her. Now ever since she unblocked me it's like I started from day one of NC and going threw all the emotions again, it's annoying. I keep asking myself why she unblocked me from FB???? It's stupid since it probably has no meaning and she is probably just rubbing in her happiness in my face, yet she broke up with me, why keep hating on me when I did nothing but good for her. In the end, I'm having a real hard time not breaking NC... Link to post Share on other sites
RickFox Posted September 27, 2011 Share Posted September 27, 2011 While not entirely in the same situation as you, I can sympathize. Why don't you block her on your facebook page so the wound can start healing once again. It ain't easy, probably won't ever be, but hold steady on NC. Question is, what will you do when/if she does contact you? Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGal Posted September 27, 2011 Share Posted September 27, 2011 Unblocking you means that you had to accept a new friend request, correct? If so, you shouldn't have. You made the correct choice by deleting her email and phone number... So you need to eliminate the Facebook connection too, or it's not really no contact. In fairness, I have done the same thing as you.. I deleted the phone number but still peek at my ex's FB. Sometimes I feel sad, sometimes I feel nothing, but you know what I NEVER feel when I look? ... happy! I want to be happy though, and these little ways of holding on to him only hurt me and slow my recovery. We all make our own choices though, and the right ones arent always easy. I'm glad you have a new friend to help you a bit. You don't sound too bad off, so give yourself some credit. I am 3.5 months post breakup and I still think of my ex all the time. I don't like it, but all I can do is keep moving on. And you should too. Lastly, stop wondering "why". If she wanted to talk to you, she would. Period. My ex messaged me a few days ago that he has my things ready for me to pick up (after all this time!). So I messaged back that I would send someone by. He immediately called a mutual friend to arrange pick up. I thought "that's weird. He must have expected me to go... I wonder if he WANTED me to go and maybe he has something to say... I wonder if he misses me... What is he thinking about.. hmm". And then I said out loud to myself "stop!". Im not playing the "I wonder" or the "what if" game anymore. You'll get to this point too. Keep doing your best to be true to yourself! Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Author A7X Posted September 27, 2011 Author Share Posted September 27, 2011 Question is, what will you do when/if she does contact you? I don't even know, I'm pissed at her and at the same time I miss her and well as much as I hate saying it, I still love her... It's like what hurts more; Thinking you should hate her or knowing you don't. Link to post Share on other sites
Author A7X Posted September 27, 2011 Author Share Posted September 27, 2011 Unblocking you means that you had to accept a new friend request, correct? If so, you shouldn't have. You made the correct choice by deleting her email and phone number... So you need to eliminate the Facebook connection too, or it's not really no contact. Actually I deleted her as a friend when she broke up with me, then she blocked me from being able to find her on FB. I noticed that she unblocked me because I could see her profile again when I was on a mutual friends profile. I don't see any details or anything just that she has a profile. As for blocking her, I'm playing the I don't even know you unblocked me game, childish, yet I don't want her thinking that I'm still thinking about her and checking up on her. I haven't really searched her much, just a few times and like you I get mad when I do. Link to post Share on other sites
RickFox Posted September 27, 2011 Share Posted September 27, 2011 Hard to hate someone when your feelings are so strong. You find you hate what they've done or that they hurt you, but hating "them" is not productive and merely masks your true emotions which will come out sooner than later. None of it is easy I'm sure. Link to post Share on other sites
GabbyGirl Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 My advice is to not contact her if you really want to move on and heal. I contacted my ex once when his mother passed away. All I got was a thanks and never heard from him again. Its difficult I know but you are only hurting yourself by hanging to hope. I am sorry you are hurting but I believe everything happens for a reason. Only time will reveal the reason. Link to post Share on other sites
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