abuckeyeleaf Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 So I see a lot of posts from men on here who get dumped by their girlfriend, and then she comes crawling back crying and begging. So I was just wondering, ladies, have you ever had the same experience with a guy who dumped you? Did he come crawling back, begging for a second chance? Link to post Share on other sites
momto3boys Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 My oldest son's father and i broke up multiple times and he was always the one to want to try to get back together. My soon to be ex-husband once kicked me out of our house, i moved 6 hours away and after a month of limited contact (we have a son together) he emailed me telling me he missed me and wanted to work things out. So yeah i have, but it ended up not working out in the end! lol. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 Yes, some do, but IME, historically, the ones who have crawled back did so to what could only be acknowledged as unhealthy relationships. There are a couple who were good friends whom I ended up cutting contact with because I couldn't deal with their drama. Perhaps those relationships later became healthy, IDK. An example of 'non-crawling' would be agreeing to mediation and/or MC and working things out on a mutually agreeable footing. I've seen examples of that, as well; some reconcile, some D. No panacea, IME. Link to post Share on other sites
radiodarcy Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 not for me. once the guy was done he was done. i have seen numerous other male posters on here who do talk about wanting their gfs/wives back. but that hasn't been my experience. i have to say that in a lot of cases on these boards i do so more instances of the male dumpees saying the women who dumped them did contact them wanting to get back together. but more often than not, the reconciliation was fleeting and she wound up dumping him again. Link to post Share on other sites
TheDovic Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 So I see a lot of posts from men on here who get dumped by their girlfriend, and then she comes crawling back crying and begging.QUOTE] I don't see these too often!!! Hope it happens to me though Link to post Share on other sites
danceallday Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 Does it depend on who is the dumper/dumpee? Link to post Share on other sites
Author abuckeyeleaf Posted September 29, 2011 Author Share Posted September 29, 2011 No I'm curious about all situations. In my case, he was the dumper though. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 So I see a lot of posts from men on here who get dumped by their girlfriend, and then she comes crawling back crying and begging. So I was just wondering, ladies, have you ever had the same experience with a guy who dumped you? Did he come crawling back, begging for a second chance? I've seen it in both men and women. Happens all the time. My sister had a bf after her first marriage was over who dumped her because he decided he couldn't deal with the drama of having kids (hers) in their life together. Six months later, he sent an Email trying to get back together and suggesting they meet for coffee, trying very much to bring up fond memories that would entice her to consider taking him back. She realized that if he had so much trouble the first time to deal with kids in the picture (he never had any of his own), then he's not a good candidate for a LTR. She didn't give him another chance, even though she believes he was the most facinating man she had ever met, and she loved him very much. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 Does it depend on who is the dumper/dumpee? I would imagine, generally, as indicated by the tone of the title, 'crawling back', the person doing the crawling would be the person who was/is the 'dumper'. It's problematical for the dumpee to crawl anywhere, as they were dumped. In a mutual breakup where there is no predominate dumping 'force', I could see a more equitable potential for 'crawling', though I don't think it would occur in the same way. Link to post Share on other sites
Feelin Frisky Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 (edited) I've never turned back. I make decisions and then that's that. And no one "dumps" me--they opt out at their own loss. I may forgive a poor decision and take her back but I don't consider it "crawling"--just being dumb and discovering it. Edited September 29, 2011 by Feelin Frisky Link to post Share on other sites
dreamcity Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 Interesting. I can't imagine my ex crawling back... I think as much as anything he'd be too proud. Mind you, I'm still not sure if it was mutual or I was dumped, so who knows. In past experience they haven't come crawling back, and neither have I when I did the dumping. But then I have to really be fed up with someone to dump them in the first place, so maybe I should work on that... Link to post Share on other sites
immitable Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 stupid pride is a love killer. Link to post Share on other sites
TLCbear Posted September 30, 2011 Share Posted September 30, 2011 So I see a lot of posts from men on here who get dumped by their girlfriend, and then she comes crawling back crying and begging. So I was just wondering, ladies, have you ever had the same experience with a guy who dumped you? Did he come crawling back, begging for a second chance? Only had 3 relationships so far and all 3 tried to come back. I did get back with 2 of them, but it didn't work in the end, as someone stated earlier. However, my second ex, I was glad to have another chance with him, but the timing was all wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
aerogurl87 Posted September 30, 2011 Share Posted September 30, 2011 So I see a lot of posts from men on here who get dumped by their girlfriend, and then she comes crawling back crying and begging. So I was just wondering, ladies, have you ever had the same experience with a guy who dumped you? Did he come crawling back, begging for a second chance? My ex did, first it started off with him being all cool about everything and pestering me to come visit him. Then somehow that gave way to him calling me out of the blue, bawling his eyes out, and telling me he missed me and wanted me back. Link to post Share on other sites
Author abuckeyeleaf Posted September 30, 2011 Author Share Posted September 30, 2011 Only had 3 relationships so far and all 3 tried to come back. I did get back with 2 of them, but it didn't work in the end, as someone stated earlier. However, my second ex, I was glad to have another chance with him, but the timing was all wrong. What were the reasons behind your breakups? Who did the dumping? Link to post Share on other sites
M2155 Posted September 30, 2011 Share Posted September 30, 2011 Yes they do. Reasons I think are mainly timing (his career, emotions, what his friends are doing, biological clock etc...) and not finding someone that he has the same connection with, but not realizing that until they've gone out and tried it of course. I guess you could feel the same way if you had a job you liked 80% and went looking for a better one only to end up in a position that makes you realize you didn't appreciate all that you had in that job. I had a guy come back in college after he moved on because "he missed what we had." It didn't work though, we couldn't get "it" back. I've had almost all the others contact me at some point to say they wished they had tried harder with me. My recent ex I agree with the poster who mentioned pride. There is NO WAY he's coming back after the terrible way he left me, hope he is ashamed. However, he left me after almost 2 years to go back to his ex before me so they do back. I don't know about the crawling part but they seem very happy. Link to post Share on other sites
TLCbear Posted October 9, 2011 Share Posted October 9, 2011 What were the reasons behind your breakups? Who did the dumping? Sorry, I missed this one. I did the dumping in 2 of my relationships. The first one, I was with him for 5 years, I guess the relationship just ran it course...and it decided to leave, we were too different. The second one, he broke up with me because he said he was going through alot issues, he contacted me a year later and we started back up but I didn't feel the same way, plus we both wanted different things...when he came back to me, he wanted to get married, I didn't, but did wanted to at the beginning...funny how we switched places. Timing was all wrong on this one. The third one, I ended after 4 years, because the guy was a lier, couldn't communicate, and was very secretive. Got tired of the lies and talking to a brick wall. I still miss him though. Wish he would change or at least improve himself, we could had have a good thing. Link to post Share on other sites
nini Posted October 9, 2011 Share Posted October 9, 2011 Mine just did and am in shock! Only like days after I had completely accepted the breakup and decided to move on without him, he sent me a message on FB asking if we could talk and I unblocked him on MSN and we had a chat which went along the lines of "I love you, I miss you, been dreaming of you every night, just had to say i want you back coz I would regret not saying it" I said I had to focus on me and my exams and don't want to think of anything re past. Hmmmm...this feels weird! Link to post Share on other sites
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