How to reedeem myself?

[Joe]

About 2 months ago my ex dumped me because she was cheating on me many times for the roommate, uggg!! Anyway for the last 2 months I've been moping around feeling sorry for myself and hurt. Slowly I've been getting better but today something inside really changed. I saw my high school crush who I have always had eyes for and the same with her but we never got together. She's happily married and has kids but seeing her even just to say "hi" "how are u" just changed my feeling on this whole break up. I started feeling angry and used by my ex. I don't want anything to do with her, she is welcome to call me but I'm not wasting my time or energy contacting her. My question is this. Me and my ex's final talk she said our relationship was fake and she feels guilty and ashamed. I feel like I got played and I am so embarrassed. But I think she has problems she can just jump from one man to the other, we were together for three years!! I want nothing to do with girls right now. But I am now recooperating in my hometown and working out. I want to know how to make her (if I ever see her) feel like she made the biggest mistake of her life. I let her walk all over me, and I want her to feel like crap for a change. I know I should probably just forget I ever knew her, etc. but I feel so embarrassed this would kind do myself justice. Any advice would be welcome.

 

Joe

[Tony T]

This girl sounds like the type that would just wallow in any pain she may have caused you. She is what is known as a sociopath, someone who can walk into someone's life, create havoc and walk out without conscience or remorse.

 

You don't have to do a thing to get back at her. Nature will do the job just fine. She has a lot of serious problems which she will have to face for years ahead. She is an insincere, cheap, confused, phoney, scuzzbag and she will get what she deserves.

 

Why you want to let her continue to affect you is beyond my wildest imagination. She has done enough damage to you. You should honor her for the seriously valuable lesson she taught you. But more than that, you should honor your valued days of life on this planet by not wasting them trying to get back at this mental case...but rather in using your time to make your own life better from here forward.

[Jenna]

Joe- revenge will not get you anywhere. It's funny how as we get older- we come to believe that "what goes around -comes around"- and this will be the case for your ex-girlfriend. One day she will truly fall for someone- let herself become totally in love with this person- and then she will get hurt- she will feel used- she will find herself with the same feelings that you are having. She will understand what she did to you was wrong- and then have to live with it for the rest of her life. THIS is the sweetest kind of revenge- the kind we have no hand in.

 

You are hanging on to your anger- which allows her to still be in control of you- wouldn't you rather be in control of your own feelings?? Of course you would- but revenge won't do it for you- I promise.

 

Redirect the energy that you are puting into your anger into something more productive- something that will make YOU a better person. YOU be the one who can step up to the plate and say- "I am a stronger more wiser person for this experience- and I will learn from it."

 

About the high-school sweetie- leave her alone. She is married with children- whatever you were thinking there- forget it. That is not the kind of lesson you want to learn from this bad experience- "how to break-up a happy home while on the rebound-101"

 

Never be embarrassed by your experiences- this is how we learn- look at your mistakes- and take steps not to repeat them in the future.

 

Time with friends is a good way to get your mind off of your anger - you are still in the healing process and need support from people who care about you. You can't skip this part- nor can you make it less painful by seeking revenge. Be a man and move on from this with your head up high- looking forward to better days.

 

Good Luck. Jenna

About 2 months ago my ex dumped me because she was cheating on me many times for the roommate, uggg!! Anyway for the last 2 months I've been moping around feeling sorry for myself and hurt. Slowly I've been getting better but today something inside really changed. I saw my high school crush who I have always had eyes for and the same with her but we never got together. She's happily married and has kids but seeing her even just to say "hi" "how are u" just changed my feeling on this whole break up. I started feeling angry and used by my ex. I don't want anything to do with her, she is welcome to call me but I'm not wasting my time or energy contacting her. My question is this. Me and my ex's final talk she said our relationship was fake and she feels guilty and ashamed. I feel like I got played and I am so embarrassed. But I think she has problems she can just jump from one man to the other, we were together for three years!! I want nothing to do with girls right now. But I am now recooperating in my hometown and working out. I want to know how to make her (if I ever see her) feel like she made the biggest mistake of her life. I let her walk all over me, and I want her to feel like crap for a change. I know I should probably just forget I ever knew her, etc. but I feel so embarrassed this would kind do myself justice. Any advice would be welcome. Joe