Porn & My Boyfrined like Peanut Butter & Jelly

[Going Crazy]

Before me and my bf met, he told me he watched porn religously. He knows every female porn stars name, almost every movie, and actually sickens me that he knows this and watches these movies that much. But, what makes me a hypocrit is that, before I met him and now, I would watch porn too. Not every goddamn minute but I've had my share of it. Now, I am an EXTREMELY JEALOUS person. If he makes one comment on a porn stars body that I know I will never have, it makes me so mad, I don't even want to talk to him. But this is a serious problem. No matter how much he says how good my body is, knowing that he has to get off to those girls instead of getting off with me, pisses me off! He's ask me to watch porn movies with him. He also wants us to copy what they do on the movie... That I'm fine with but, once again, I feel hes getting off to watching those women instead of concentrating on me. I don't mind watching those movies with him, actually for my sake, hes insisted on buying me porn of cute, built, guys masterbating. (?!?) The other day, I commented on this actors georgeous body, and of course, he got pissed! Why is it okay for him to see naked bitches all the time, and when I see one cute guy, I'm a bad girlfriend? Anyway, here are my questions finally!

 

1. How can I learn to deal with my Jealousy?

 

2. Is it possible, he just wants me to watch male porn so that he can watch all the women he wants!!??

 

3. Does it make me a bad person that I like to watch porn, in private and alone, but won't watch it with him?

[Tony T]

It is so very nice when people post with specific questions. Thank you!!!

 

1. How can I learn to deal with my Jealousy?

 

You need to become more secure with yourself, your body, your personality and your importance to your guy. If he doesn not make you feel very special and far more superior than any of these ladies that appear on his tapes, go find a man who will. The biggest part of love is feeling very special to the person who loves us and being able to return that feeling.

 

If you feel loved, feel important, feel special, and are totally convinced that he holds you in far higher regard than these naked ladies from afar, there is absolutely no reason to be jealous.

 

I think his making remarks about porn stars' bodies in front of you is very rude and cheapens the relationship. If he insists on watching this stuff, he should keep his evaluations to himself. If he is to continue watching porn on the level he now does, it needs to be discrete and it needs to cease as a factor in the relationship.

 

2. Is it possible, he just wants me to watch male porn so that he can watch all the women he wants!!??

 

I sort of think that's the idea. Most men like to watch naked ladies, ladies in bikinis, etc. because they enjoy the female anatomy. However, your boyfriend sounds unduly obsessed and I think that's a bit of a problem. Whether you are jealous or not, that is immaterial. The fact that your guy enjoys a constant diet of this stuff indicates some abnormality, in my opionion. Enough is enough.

 

I also think it does the relationship harm because if he watches so much of it, by the time he gets to making love with you his hormones are probably pooped out. I don't blame you for being troubled with his obsession and I think he needs some help for that.

 

To answer your question, yes, I think men who watch a lot of porn want to see a lot of a lot of women.

 

3. Does it make me a bad person that I like to watch porn, in private and alone, but won't watch it with him?

 

Doesn't make you a bad person at all. That is a judgement and nobody on the planet has been appointed to judge your behavior. If you are comfortable with that, it's no problem.

 

There are many couples who, on occasion, watch porn of varying intensity to help them become more aroused or to set the stage for more intense lovemaking. However, too much of anything is not good. I think you should take a lot of these tapes in and trade them for some good children's books and donate them to a charity.

 

Keep a few good tapes around for occasion. Watching these all the time for entertainment purposes, especially the same ones, is a bit wacky. Hey, there are some really good movies coming out of Hollywood with great plots, etc. that aren't porn. Watch one sometime, you may enjoy.

[Deejette]

I don't think this porn watching is a good habit in a serious relationship. I mean, if he is doing this now, while you are young and attractive, what will you feel like when you get older and some of your looks go south? It will only make you more and more insecure about whom he is really making love to.

It is so very nice when people post with specific questions. Thank you!!! 1. How can I learn to deal with my Jealousy?

 

You need to become more secure with yourself, your body, your personality and your importance to your guy. If he doesn not make you feel very special and far more superior than any of these ladies that appear on his tapes, go find a man who will. The biggest part of love is feeling very special to the person who loves us and being able to return that feeling. If you feel loved, feel important, feel special, and are totally convinced that he holds you in far higher regard than these naked ladies from afar, there is absolutely no reason to be jealous.

 

I think his making remarks about porn stars' bodies in front of you is very rude and cheapens the relationship. If he insists on watching this stuff, he should keep his evaluations to himself. If he is to continue watching porn on the level he now does, it needs to be discrete and it needs to cease as a factor in the relationship. 2. Is it possible, he just wants me to watch male porn so that he can watch all the women he wants!!?? I sort of think that's the idea. Most men like to watch naked ladies, ladies in bikinis, etc. because they enjoy the female anatomy. However, your boyfriend sounds unduly obsessed and I think that's a bit of a problem. Whether you are jealous or not, that is immaterial. The fact that your guy enjoys a constant diet of this stuff indicates some abnormality, in my opionion. Enough is enough.

 

I also think it does the relationship harm because if he watches so much of it, by the time he gets to making love with you his hormones are probably pooped out. I don't blame you for being troubled with his obsession and I think he needs some help for that. To answer your question, yes, I think men who watch a lot of porn want to see a lot of a lot of women. 3. Does it make me a bad person that I like to watch porn, in private and alone, but won't watch it with him? Doesn't make you a bad person at all. That is a judgement and nobody on the planet has been appointed to judge your behavior. If you are comfortable with that, it's no problem. There are many couples who, on occasion, watch porn of varying intensity to help them become more aroused or to set the stage for more intense lovemaking. However, too much of anything is not good. I think you should take a lot of these tapes in and trade them for some good children's books and donate them to a charity. Keep a few good tapes around for occasion. Watching these all the time for entertainment purposes, especially the same ones, is a bit wacky. Hey, there are some really good movies coming out of Hollywood with great plots, etc. that aren't porn. Watch one sometime, you may enjoy.