SimplyRoxy16 Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 (I posted this in the dating section before finding this section, maybe it belongs here more) I really just need others insight on what to do ... some background. I'm 26, I have a 3 year old son whom I have 50% of the time. He's 22. We met through work, I work with his brother and he worked there over the summer. We hit it off one night out at a bar, talked, danced, drank and made out. I got caught up in having way too much fun and didnt think. But he asked for my number and we instantly hit it off, talking almost every day through text. Hanging out with mutual friends and basically became friends with benefits for the summer which was fine. End of August rolled around and I went away for work for a week with no phone service. We resorted to fb messages and skpying several times during this week. He then said he missed seeing me and talking to me all day and of course now I started to actually think we had something. When I returned he had already moved 2 hours from me to live with his friends while they finished their masters, he decided not to go past his bachelors and we continued to talk every day, all day pretty much. Playing video games together, watching movies via xbox (I know very childish in a sense but I love it, I had to grow up fast when I had my son). About a month ago I asked him what we were, or what it was to him and he said he honestly didnt know. I said I was just curious if we were just into each other and he said he often wondered that too but didn't know. Now I know the age difference is a lot, the fact that I have a son is a lot and I am not at all asking for a commitment, just that maybe we are exploring what could be. Being exclusive I guess. I do like him, very much. We have a lot in common dispite the age difference. We have the same goals and everything. So after that conversation, that next weekend I went up to visit and it was great. He held my hand, we went out with his friends, like we were together and I decided to just let it be what it was for a bit. The next three weeks we were apart were like usual, talking all day, watching movies, joking. He started telling me he missed me and wished I was there when he went out with his friends and I was too. I felt the same way and I said it back. This weekend he came home and again I felt like I just needed some direction as to what to feel, what to expect, if I should pull away and stop falling for him and he said "to be honestly I don't know what to think of this either, I'm not sure where I'm at but I dont want to hold you back if I'm ok with it and you're not". I told him I just needed to know how I should feel and what I should do and then I invited him out Saturday night if he felt like it, because I had made plans with a friend and I said goodnight. He decided to came on his own and we were all couplish. We hung out yesterday in bed for a few hours just talking and being cute. And I just don't know what to do ... do I walk away and just be friends, let him be him or do I just deal with whatever this is and see what it may become, if anything ... I just need advice and I thank anyone who read this entire thing! lol thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 Aw, it sounds like you have a good thing going on and you're a bit nervous for some reason. It's only been a few months, and I believe it helps to know someone through all the seasons before committing to, say, living together. What is it you're nervous about? Would you be happy with a long distant relationship as you have now until next summer? It may help you to balance your life a bit better - to put this relationship in perspective as a positive part of your life but not the be all and end all. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SimplyRoxy16 Posted October 4, 2011 Author Share Posted October 4, 2011 Thank you so much for your incite. I am nervous just mainly because every relationship I have been in has been a mess. Just the wrong people, they always have issues I am trying to fix. They are the ones to say what they think I want to hear. A week into are wanting to spend every moment with me and a month in are in love. I have been with a cheater, a liar, an abusive relationship so I find it hard that this is normal I suppose and I am just trying to find the faults or rush it too much and I need to just chill. So thank you. And you're right, he has been honest and upfront from the beginning and I need to except that and just go with the flow and let be what will be without constantly worrying or questioning everything. I guess I also just think the age, tho maybe not a big deal, 4 years but a lot for a 22 year old to take on a girl with a child is whats holding him back and I would understand that but I also don't want to let my heart get involved if it may never be anything. Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 You'll only know if it will last a long time in, well, a long time, and you might as well enjoy it in the meantime whilst you're finding out. Link to post Share on other sites
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