Author cracker2011 Posted October 22, 2011 Author Share Posted October 22, 2011 Heavenorhell I replied to your last pm. I hope u got it. I sent on my mobile so not 100% it sent. Link to post Share on other sites
HeavenOrHell Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Got it Will reply to you tomorrow Heavenorhell I replied to your last pm. I hope u got it. I sent on my mobile so not 100% it sent. Link to post Share on other sites
thatone Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 He basically said it was my lack of trust and my constant breaking up with him that drove us apart. And that he misses me alot etc etc.. i just read through your past threads. the above is the most obvious thing in the world. i have nothing against LDRs if one or the other person has the willingness and means to travel regularly, first of all. and i've done LDRs myself. but do you have any idea what it feels like when you put all of that effort into making a LDR work and the response you get is distrust/distance from the other person? nevermind, i'll answer that, you don't. you seem so obsessed with your own feelings that you probably never considered his. it erases everything positive you see in that person, you can't help but become distant yourself when someone does that to you, because you can't think of the good things about them anymore, you can only think of either some scheme to convince them or when you're going to be rid of them. and every time you accuse him after he broke up with you of being with someone else you reinforce the decision in his mind that he did the right thing. this is a pattern. you are destructive, you hurt other people to avoid dealing with your own issues. that's why he's gone. and that's why the next man you meet will be gone too, and the next and the next. you cannot have relationships without both people trusting each other. yeah, sometimes people will break that trust. it will happen, you'll be hurt, then you'll get over it. but that doesn't mean you can distrust everyone and expect them to appease you despite your issues. i find it pretty amazing that he stuck around as long as he did since you tell us that you've broken up with him at the airport multiple times. he must've loved you to put up with that for so long. but it seems you wouldn't let go until you succeeded in destroying the relationship. you need to stop. stop contacting him. stop distrusting people because of your own issues. stop trying to preemptively hurt other people because they 'might' hurt you. stop everything you do or have done and start over. Link to post Share on other sites
wild_urge Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 i just read through your past threads. the above is the most obvious thing in the world. i have nothing against LDRs if one or the other person has the willingness and means to travel regularly, first of all. and i've done LDRs myself. but do you have any idea what it feels like when you put all of that effort into making a LDR work and the response you get is distrust/distance from the other person? nevermind, i'll answer that, you don't. you seem so obsessed with your own feelings that you probably never considered his. it erases everything positive you see in that person, you can't help but become distant yourself when someone does that to you, because you can't think of the good things about them anymore, you can only think of either some scheme to convince them or when you're going to be rid of them. and every time you accuse him after he broke up with you of being with someone else you reinforce the decision in his mind that he did the right thing. this is a pattern. you are destructive, you hurt other people to avoid dealing with your own issues. that's why he's gone. and that's why the next man you meet will be gone too, and the next and the next. you cannot have relationships without both people trusting each other. yeah, sometimes people will break that trust. it will happen, you'll be hurt, then you'll get over it. but that doesn't mean you can distrust everyone and expect them to appease you despite your issues. i find it pretty amazing that he stuck around as long as he did since you tell us that you've broken up with him at the airport multiple times. he must've loved you to put up with that for so long. but it seems you wouldn't let go until you succeeded in destroying the relationship. you need to stop. stop contacting him. stop distrusting people because of your own issues. stop trying to preemptively hurt other people because they 'might' hurt you. stop everything you do or have done and start over. WOULD YOU PLEASE STOP WITH YOUR MEAN COMMENTS? She gets it, alright! Now she wants to change, but your critique is pointless, instead you are making her feel worse, you could actually help by giving some advice on how she can change. Why are you condemning people you don't even know? Why is life so simple for you? Why is it only black and white ? Well, let me tell you this, it is not ! I don't know in what type of LDR you have been, but may be you've never been in one for too long or you've never been in one with someone you love! It's more than hard, it's an everyday struggle and because someone made a few mistakes it doesn't mean that they don't love with all their heart and it doesn't mean that they should give up, because long distance relationships are about NOT GIVING UP! Link to post Share on other sites
thatone Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 the truth isn't mean. this thread is 9 pages long and only one person even suggested WHY this situation happened. Link to post Share on other sites
wild_urge Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 (edited) the truth isn't mean. this thread is 9 pages long and only one person even suggested WHY this situation happened. Well if you have read all 9 pages, you would have seen that I actally stated the two reason and she agreed to them! That was a couple of paгes back. . . and now it's time to discuss how to makes things better, noт to пут blame on her! Edited October 23, 2011 by wild_urge Link to post Share on other sites
Author cracker2011 Posted October 24, 2011 Author Share Posted October 24, 2011 thanks wildurge for your support. x heavenorhell.. i sent you reply to your mail answering your questions last eve..hope you got it! Link to post Share on other sites
HeavenOrHell Posted October 24, 2011 Share Posted October 24, 2011 I got it, will reply tonight thanks wildurge for your support. x heavenorhell.. i sent you reply to your mail answering your questions last eve..hope you got it! Link to post Share on other sites
Author cracker2011 Posted November 1, 2011 Author Share Posted November 1, 2011 was sad this weekend, back at feeling pain from the end of the relationship and back being angry at him :(so broken hearted:( Link to post Share on other sites
Author cracker2011 Posted December 20, 2011 Author Share Posted December 20, 2011 Ex is home for Xmas. He wants to meet me Friday. I'm excited to see him but incredibly nervous too. We have been in touch every week since we broke up. He says he still misses me and loves me. Any suggestions how to handle meeting him... I'm so scared Link to post Share on other sites
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