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19 days NC and urge to break


brokenheartedinaz

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brokenheartedinaz

It's been 19 days and each day is getting harder and harder. I feel like texting him today and saying I miss you but I realize you aren't coming back. I came to Vegas last night with my friend to get away and have fun but all I do is think of him. It's driving me insane! Someone please talk me out of reaching out to him!

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It's been 19 days and each day is getting harder and harder. I feel like texting him today and saying I miss you but I realize you aren't coming back. I came to Vegas last night with my friend to get away and have fun but all I do is think of him. It's driving me insane! Someone please talk me out of reaching out to him!

 

Don't text, call him, email him. Don't do anything him.

 

19 days is not enough time to get well. It may take longer. Along the way there are going to be a lot of ups and downs. But.....................it WILL get better.

 

 

mike

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Also, I still feel like calling too. Almost sent her an email the other night, but didn't. I woke up the next day saying to myself, "thank goodness I didn't do that!"

 

Ups and down, ya know :)

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brokenheartedinaz

Thanks Mike it just sucks. I know if I didn't tell him not to text me he would but I still wish he would say something to me. I miss him so much and I just want to tell him that so he doesn't think I forgot about him or don't care anymore.

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Thanks Mike it just sucks. I know if I didn't tell him not to text me he would but I still wish he would say something to me. I miss him so much and I just want to tell him that so he doesn't think I forgot about him or don't care anymore.

 

 

Hey, brokenheartedinaz. I can only say in my situation that I know the reason she has not called me is that she cares about my feelings so much and she knows that if she were to contact me, it would only prolong the healing process. So maybe this is a good reason not to contact him, and maybe this is why he has not contacted you.

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brokenheartedinaz

Yes mike I know you are right. He is respecting my wishes since I asked him not to cause it hurt too much. Even still a how are you text sounds good right now. I almost text him I miss u right now, my friend told me maybe I should and I typed it up and everything but I just realized no good will come from it. I would be back to square one.

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I'm in the same position, except I'm more like 10 days in....

 

The one thing that stops me from reaching out to her is when I remind myself that it won't do me any good.

 

What can they possibly say that would make me feel better? Until she's ready to admit she ****ed up and wants to work things out. There is NO point in talking, and NOTHING else she can say to make things any better.

 

Just remember, you're also stroking their ego by reaching out. Even if their intentions are to just respect your wishes etc.. It would make them feel kind of good knowing you're still thinking about them.

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brokenheartedinaz

Yes R32 that's what I've been telling myself...no good will come out of it.he already knows how hard this is on me..reminding him won't do anything.if he wanted me back he knows he can and obviously he hasn't. Ill just look more needy. Thank you guys for helping me with this..I was so close to relapsing and glad I didn't cause I would feel worse.

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brokenheartedinaz

Yes R32 that's what I've been telling myself...no good will come out of it.he already knows how hard this is on me..reminding him won't do anything.if he wanted me back he knows he can and obviously he hasn't. Ill just look more needy. Thank you guys for helping me with this..I was so close to relapsing and glad I didn't cause I would feel worse.

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Yes R32 that's what I've been telling myself...no good will come out of it.he already knows how hard this is on me..reminding him won't do anything.if he wanted me back he knows he can and obviously he hasn't. Ill just look more needy. Thank you guys for helping me with this..I was so close to relapsing and glad I didn't cause I would feel worse.

 

 

 

Yep. And if you feel like texting again, just give it another hour and wait. Or maybe sleep on it over night and see how you feel in the morning. Sometimes we reach out in all the wrong directions when we are tired and/or feeling down. A night's sleep often does wonders with fresh, clear thoughts in the morning.

 

You also said "I would be back to square one". That's a good way to look at it. Especially when we have already traversed over 5 big squares and maybe only have 5 more to go to make it to the end of our journey. Being back at the start again, could be a bummer, ya know?

 

Be well :)

 

mike

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brokenheartedinaz

Broke NC

 

I was going to my brothers to pick up my car and the ex lives down the street so i figured he could drop off the remainder of my things before i got there. I text him hey you busy....no response so when i got home i just told him i would be in the area tomorrow if he wants to drop it off or leave it in front of his house. He text me back last night when I was sleeping that he wasnt feeling well and that he was going to be working late this whole week but could leave it outside. I said that was fine and told him he could also give me back the things I returned that I asked him to hold on for me til I was ready for them back like, cards, pics, gifts. He then called me right now and said he was sorry but he wasnt able to get all my stuff together and that he could meet up with me later on this week to give it back and that he wasn't sure of all the stuff I wanted back. He also told me he returned the earrings I gave him back that he bought me for my bday. So after we hung up I stupidly texted him, I'm sad you returned the earrings but I understand.He then replied,

 

I told you to keep them, it was within 60 days so I returned them cause it was stupid to pay interest on a $500 pair of earrings that are sitting in a box when it was pretty clear the person I gave them to didn't want them.

 

 

Ugh! So i replied, I asked you to hold on to the things but it,s okay , no worries, I understand and I shouldn't have even said anything about it.

 

 

Now I feel crummy again. :*(

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Now I feel crummy again. :*(

 

 

Yeah, you and me both. I wanted to break NC today as well. I feel like I am such a terrible rut over this whole thing. I just feel as though I am having such a tough time of picking myself up and going on. Blah.......... :sick:

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brokenheartedinaz

So he text me this morning out of the blue....said Hey I just want to say hope you have a good day. I replied that was nice of you , hope you are feeling better and have a non stressful day at work. He then replied thanks for the nice thought and proceeded to tell me how stressful his new job is and thanks for the concern. I didn't reply back. Still my heart is beating so fast just from hearing his ringtone come in when I least expected it. ERRRR why does something so minute make your blood just rush and filled with all these emotions. Why did he even text me?Maybe he wants to be friends? I know I'm over analyzing all this im just all caught up in the moment I guess.

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