KS11 Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 I posted a few weeks back about whether it was possible to stay friends with someone even though you love them, and i wish i could say things since then have got better and that im all sorted but im not. not even close. Basically i ended up sending a letter to this girl saying, once a for all how i felt, and implied that carrying on as we were, as friends, wouldnt be fair on her as i would always be expecting more. So then we had a big conversation the day after with her explaining that she still confused etc etc. A couple of days later i decided that the best thing to do was to not speak for a while to give her space to figure out what she wants, to which she replied that it wasnt what she wanted to do at all but maybe i was right, and that she wanted me to know that she 'loves me to bits'??? So that was a week ago, and we havent spoken since, and its killing me. All i can keep thinking is that if she had suddenly felt something for me that she would have said already, a week is too long a time...its like now i think shes just trying to stall from telling me that it really isnt going to happen. I dont know what to do, i dont know whether i should just ask her now and say its obvious that its not gona happen, so just tell me. I hate thinking that shes probably barely even thought about me the whole time, whilst all ive wanted to do is speak to her. The worst thing is, i thought the last few months have been hard and now i know its going to get so much worse. Link to post Share on other sites
wilsonx Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 I will tell you something, if its meant to be, she will move mountains to tell you so. She will say "I am so sorry, I made a mistake" in those words. Do not accept anything less then that if she says "I miss you" thats just I miss you as a friend. Trust me, Ive been there and done both parts At the same time dont wait around for her, keep NC and keep focusing on you Link to post Share on other sites
Author KS11 Posted October 12, 2011 Author Share Posted October 12, 2011 Thats what i mean though, dont you think that the fact she hasnt 'moved mountains' already to tell me that shes just trying to build up courage to tell me that she doesnt feel the same? I dont want to bore you all with how much im hurting, but i duno what to do, i miss talking to her so much, and theres part of me that just wants her to tell me now so i can somehow try and handle it?? Link to post Share on other sites
smudge21 Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 A week is nothing - people have holidays longer than that and don't talk to their friends or family during that time. If you expect her in anyway to suddenly come back and realise that she does want to be with you, then first she has to truly miss you. A week is never going to allow her to feel that way. Not even a month. But in reality you can't think like that and instead should realise that what you did was the right thing to do, given the options you had. Could you really have stayed where you were with this girl? Stay strong and stay NC. As Wilson rightly says, if she wants you, she'll come to you. Link to post Share on other sites
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