dicky_fish Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 Not long ago I posted this thread http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=296853 on here about knowing what I'm running from in regards to healing because it is gonna hurt even more. Well today I think I've moved slightly more towards that but in the wrong way. I had quite a stressful job interview today and really wanted to either talk or hang out with a friend to take my mind off it. Rang round loads of people and not a single answer, apart from a scathing text message from the friend I mentioned in the other thread about how I know she doesn't want to talk to me about my feelings over my break up, or compare battlescars from our break-ups. I messaged her back telling her I wasn't wanting to go down that route but ended my conversation with her abruptly by telling her I got the message. I am so f*cking sick and tired of friends bailing out on me! I've spent years being there for people if they've needed me, been a shoulder to cry on or administering tough love if required. Now for once I'm in a situation where I thought that level of friendship was equal and I am getting nothing in return. This friend in particular I'm really f*cked off with now because she broke up with me 10 years ago but we remained friends through that time (we were 13 when we split so it was childish to do the stuff suggested on this board) and we grew to be best friends around the age of 17. During all that time I was always around for her when she went through break-ups. Emotional tampon I believe is the phrase used, but I took it on the chin cause I thought I could count on her when I needed. Thing is I know exactly why she doesn't want to talk to me because she's in exactly the same position as my ex being the dumper, so anything I could talk to her about has probably been levelled at her by her current ex, but I thought things ran a little deeper between us than that. The insane part in all this is I know I should be furious with my ex about this because it's her fault I've got wedged so far apart from my closest friends. But guess what: I'm NOT! Seriously starting to wonder why I should invest my time and energy into anyone because it always gets thrown back in my face. Link to post Share on other sites
LostInTurn Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 Speaking from experience, I distanced myself from everyone. I felt as though no one would hear me out and talk it out with me. Now, I find myself very distant from basically everyone. Somedays I think I'm better off, but the days when the old me wants to emerge, I have nowhere to emerge to. Don't shut yourself off from the world. Your friends are probably frustrated that you're so upset and would like to see you start pulling yourself back up again. I'm not going to give you the basic speech because I've been in your shoes. It's not easy. You probably feel as though you have no one to vent to and nowhere to turn. Well, just because you feel like that today doesn't mean that if it were to occur you'd be better off tomorrow. Take the process in small steps. I will say, try not to dwell. Keep posting. Link to post Share on other sites
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