StoneCold Posted October 18, 2011 Share Posted October 18, 2011 I wonder the same.... I wonder where the interest in "the other side" of the story is coming from all of a sudden....I thought most here werent interested in that Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted October 18, 2011 Share Posted October 18, 2011 I wonder where the interest in "the other side" of the story is coming from all of a sudden....I thought most here werent interested in that You thought wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
Quiet Storm Posted October 18, 2011 Share Posted October 18, 2011 there are two sides here, and it's unfortuneate that we don't know hers. You are right. We don't know her side. However, in a marriage I believe that both spouses should strive to meet the others needs, as long as they are reasonable needs. It shouldn't be a tally of who is doing what. Both partners should be willing to give, without keeping score. If his wife came on Loveshack and said "He keeps bugging me for sex and I'm not feeling it. I need help around the house, help with the kids.", I would expect him to try to meet her needs. I would advise him to help her. However, his wife is saying "Get over it", and it's a natural need that he has. She won't even try. He is looking for ways to suppress what is natural to him. That's wrong, IMO. Marriage is a partnership, it shouldn't be two selfish people sharing space. She has had a miscarriage and is now pregnant, so I think he should wait until a few months after the birth to address this issue. During this time, he should pay attention to his wife and learn what stresses her out. He should do his best to step up and help her. He should try to meet her needs, as best he can. Sex is not a trivial need, though. It is a very important part of marriage. He isn't asking for daily sex (he went without for two months after his wedding). He's not asking for kink. He just wants to connect with his wife, to please her, to show her he loves her in HIS way. Life isn't easy. In down times, it can be boring, stressful, painful, sad, crazy. It can suck. Regular sex keeps you content through the rough times. I'm so sleepy in the mornings, and rushing home after work, going to soccer games, helping with homework...it's nice to know that I have that alone time with my husband at the end of the day. It recharges our batteries, so to speak. I think if women looked at it less as a chore, and more as a time to connect, relax and be yourself...sex could be something to look forward to, and not something to dread. Link to post Share on other sites
StoneCold Posted October 18, 2011 Share Posted October 18, 2011 (edited) You thought wrong. Really? I guess I need to sift better through the one sidedness around this board Edited October 18, 2011 by StoneCold Link to post Share on other sites
giotto Posted October 18, 2011 Share Posted October 18, 2011 what I have learned for a mismatched libido marriage: if you put your wife under pressure, she'll avoid you even more. If you get angry, she will be put off sex forever. If you beg, she'll think you are a doormat. If you ignore her, she'll think you don't love anymore. If you avoid her, she'll never have sex with you again - mission accomplished! If you try and strike a deal, she'll do it for you, out of obligation. If you threaten divorce, she'll tell you to go. If you two can't meet in the middle, it is indeed time to go. If you don't want to go, because of your kid(s), then suck it up and shut up... Link to post Share on other sites
aerogurl87 Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Question is your wife on hormonal birth control cause that crap can change a woman's sex drive quick, not to mention her overall mood. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bigguy02 Posted November 22, 2011 Author Share Posted November 22, 2011 Im pretty sure we are now at the point of it just being over. Link to post Share on other sites
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