sagweee Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 I posted somewhere already on this situation of a guy I was involved with only for a few months last year. He was really getting serious. He was 50 at the time and I was 32, he had already divorced and has a teen-aged daugher and had already been talking about how if I had accidentally gotten pregnant he would have been happy to have another child and would marry me. I kind of got freaked out (cold feet) because he was getting so serious and I wasn't sure I wanted to make the committment last year. During our involvement I went away for two weeks on a business trip to New York and when I came back I was all confused about whether or not I wanted to move there or not because I had fallen in love with the city. I didn't know how to tell him I wanted to take a break, so I kept seeing him, but was kind of cold towards him. I didn't have the courage to actually say "let's break it off for a while," so he did it for me. We had met at this social club where he goes regularly and every time I went there after the break-up he would avoid me, and if I said hello he would be polite, but distant. About ten days ago I saw him there and started talking to him. We went out with some friends for coffee later and he seemed interested in me again and I was just laughing alot and having a good time with friends. He caught me alone when I went to get up to leave and said, "Meet me at my house in ten minutes" as he squeezed my arm in a way that was clear that he wanted to do somthing. I went to his place and saw the new renovations in his house and he fondled and caressed me, but I was not ready to do anything more with him. He asked for a certain sexual favour which I didn't want to do because I was really tired, had to take out my contact lenses and wanted to "sleep on it" before deciding to get physical again. I left his place and he said he'd call. I guess he didn't believe my excuses, even though he said he'd call, because he hasn't callled since. I called him to see a show I was involved with and he was very business like (I called at work on his cell) but said he might be able to come last Wednesday. Well, he never called and when I went to the social club this past Friday I was shocked that he never even showed up because he comes for these dinners regularly if he is not out of town, which I know he isn't. I was sure I would see him there and was preparing to tell him that I was still interested in a "no strings" thing, but he wasn't even there so I coudlnt' even tell him anything! I still went out for coffee afterwards and his friend started coming onto me strongly. We talked a bit about ourselves and it turns out his friend Mark is very nice. He asked me a few questions about the "Dave" and I told him briefly that we had only gone out for a short while and I had been disappointed that he hadn't stayed friends after the break-up. Mark asked who was the one who broke it off and I told him the truth. I mean, geez, I didn't want to start lying because these two probably talk and I only said nice things about Mark to Dave. Anyhow, now Mark wants to date me and has my number, but I am still interested in Dave. Mark hasn't called yet anyhow as he is a very busy man, but I just dont' undertand why Dave went from coming onto me SO STRONG to not even calling me and avoiding the social clul On the way home I drove passed Dave's house and saw the light in his bedroom so I know he was in town. Yesterday there was also an event for our community which I was sure he would show up at, but he didn't. I just dont' get it. Do you think I really insulted him the last time by not giving him the sexual favour he asked for? I mean, he said he respected me for not wanting to do it right away, but I didn't exactly tell him "keep your paws off me" either. I went to this event yesterday with condoms in my purse almost SURE I'd bump into him and all I saw were mainly families and old people! I'm so frustrated now because I really do want to fool around with him again. It took me a few days to realize this, but now I would be willing to "do things" with him. Is it too late to tell him this? How should I proceed? I dont' want to call him becaues that will look like I am desperate which I'm not. So, should I just show up again Friday night and see if he comes? Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted May 18, 2004 Share Posted May 18, 2004 How should I proceed? I dont' want to call him becaues that will look like I am desperate which I'm not. So, should I just show up again Friday night and see if he comes? Seems you've asked and answered your own question. Good luck with it1 Link to post Share on other sites
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