Els Posted October 19, 2011 Posted October 19, 2011 Paying for a date is fine with me. If it's inexpensive. I meet these women who want me to take them to places that are going to cost me $100 easily for dinner & drinks. They don't want apple-bee's they want $40 a plate & $8 mixed drinks places. You should probably ask yourself why so many women you are interested in have the expectation of being treated to an expensive dinner on the first date, tbh. I don't know a single decent woman who acts like that. Are you by any chance going after the high-maintenance princessy sorts?
zengirl Posted October 19, 2011 Posted October 19, 2011 You should probably ask yourself why so many women you are interested in have the expectation of being treated to an expensive dinner on the first date, tbh. I don't know a single decent woman who acts like that. Are you by any chance going after the high-maintenance princessy sorts? I would echo this. The only gals I know who'd want to go to a $100+ type place on a first date are gals who'd easily pay for themselves OR even pay for the whole meal. (High-powered types. Granted, they don't generally date guys who aren't on that same level, and the guy might buy some dinners but those gals buy dinners too.) Most of the gals I know are like me and can easily find a place with meals that are $10-20. Granted, I don't eat at Applebees, but that's my aversion to chains (I avoid as much as possible and eat at local places) not a price thing. My BF and I ate at a cheapie Thai hole-in-the-wall on our first date. Great place.
oaks Posted October 19, 2011 Posted October 19, 2011 My BF and I ate at a cheapie Thai hole-in-the-wall on our first date. Great place. Mmm. Thai food is yummy!
phineas Posted October 19, 2011 Posted October 19, 2011 You should probably ask yourself why so many women you are interested in have the expectation of being treated to an expensive dinner on the first date, tbh. I don't know a single decent woman who acts like that. Are you by any chance going after the high-maintenance princessy sorts? It's strange really, I hang out with them a few times to get to know them. They don't seem like princesses then I ask them out & their like "oh! I know this great restuarant we can go to!" I look up the menu online & I wonder exactly what this chick is smoking. I do not take them to the restuarant. I take them ice-skating, roller blading, rock climbing or just for a walk or a local winery tour. Something I can actually afford & they "want to be just friends" LOL! It's not all women mind you. Actually now that I think about it it's mostly been never married, no kids, pushing 40 making little money women. I havn't actually met anyone like that in months. I suppose it could be the fact I hang out in mature bar settings instead of party bars. I don't drink much at all so a few beers at happy hr don't hurt me money wise.
Els Posted October 19, 2011 Posted October 19, 2011 Huh, geez. That is so beyond rude, unless they'd intended to pay or go dutch. It could be a 40s syndrome thing, beats me. I admittedly don't have any single friends in their 40s, though I do know a few 20 year olds who act like that. Mainly the stereotypical 'hot' variety who have gotten used to their behaviour actually being encouraged by (usually desperate) men, and thus have come to believe that they are entitled to it.
phineas Posted October 19, 2011 Posted October 19, 2011 Huh, geez. That is so beyond rude, unless they'd intended to pay or go dutch. It could be a 40s syndrome thing, beats me. I admittedly don't have any single friends in their 40s, though I do know a few 20 year olds who act like that. Mainly the stereotypical 'hot' variety who have gotten used to their behaviour actually being encouraged by (usually desperate) men, and thus have come to believe that they are entitled to it. They are the stereotypical "hot" variety. Or were 10yrs ago LOL! Their still very attractive however I have two children to support. I don't need a 3rd.
Els Posted October 20, 2011 Posted October 20, 2011 Perhaps therein lies the reason, then. Not that you should not date whom you are attracted to, but simply understand the causality and make your decisions based on that.
Author musemaj11 Posted October 21, 2011 Author Posted October 21, 2011 They are the stereotypical "hot" variety. Or were 10yrs ago LOL! Their still very attractive however I have two children to support. I don't need a 3rd. Well dude, every woman has a price tag. Women are like cars. The shiny and new ones are a lot more expensive than the beat up ones. You get what you are willing to pay for.
joystickd Posted October 21, 2011 Posted October 21, 2011 It's strange really, I hang out with them a few times to get to know them. They don't seem like princesses then I ask them out & their like "oh! I know this great restuarant we can go to!" I look up the menu online & I wonder exactly what this chick is smoking. I do not take them to the restuarant. I take them ice-skating, roller blading, rock climbing or just for a walk or a local winery tour. Something I can actually afford & they "want to be just friends" LOL! It's not all women mind you. Actually now that I think about it it's mostly been never married, no kids, pushing 40 making little money women. I havn't actually met anyone like that in months. I suppose it could be the fact I hang out in mature bar settings instead of party bars. I don't drink much at all so a few beers at happy hr don't hurt me money wise. Time to get some younger women better a turnout than a burnout lol
Sanman Posted October 21, 2011 Posted October 21, 2011 Phineas, I know the feeling. I dated plenty of women like this a few years ago. They are mostly the young, broke, and fabulous women living in brooklyn or manhattan. I would take the above advice and think about who you want to date. Those women will always think they are fabulous and want the best that they cannot afford. My advice, give up a little in looks and gain a lot in personality. Elswyth and Zengirl, I was just stating in the other thread how I respected you two. Reading the comments on this page, I am reminded why that is true.
Author musemaj11 Posted October 21, 2011 Author Posted October 21, 2011 (edited) I was just stating in the other thread how I respected you two. Reading the comments on this page, I am reminded why that is true. I dont mean any offense to anyone but from my own real life experience, women with the most likable personality are also 'coincidentally' not the shiniest wheels on the road. I wonder if there is correlation between the two. I mean hot women won't have the time to learn to develop generous personality when they never run out of stupid men who line up to offer them everything they want and need. Edited October 21, 2011 by musemaj11
Els Posted October 21, 2011 Posted October 21, 2011 Well dude, every woman has a price tag. Women are like cars. The shiny and new ones are a lot more expensive than the beat up ones. You get what you are willing to pay for. *shrugs* Well, with this mentality, who can wonder why you end up with the users? Phineas, I know the feeling. I dated plenty of women like this a few years ago. They are mostly the young, broke, and fabulous women living in brooklyn or manhattan. I would take the above advice and think about who you want to date. Those women will always think they are fabulous and want the best that they cannot afford. My advice, give up a little in looks and gain a lot in personality. Elswyth and Zengirl, I was just stating in the other thread how I respected you two. Reading the comments on this page, I am reminded why that is true. Aww, thanks.
zengirl Posted October 21, 2011 Posted October 21, 2011 Phineas, I know the feeling. I dated plenty of women like this a few years ago. They are mostly the young, broke, and fabulous women living in brooklyn or manhattan. I would take the above advice and think about who you want to date. Those women will always think they are fabulous and want the best that they cannot afford. My advice, give up a little in looks and gain a lot in personality. Elswyth and Zengirl, I was just stating in the other thread how I respected you two. Reading the comments on this page, I am reminded why that is true. Aw, thanks, Sanman! I didn't see it in the other thread, but I appreciate it.
Author musemaj11 Posted October 22, 2011 Author Posted October 22, 2011 *shrugs* Well, with this mentality, who can wonder why you end up with the users? Im only wondering if good personality is nature or merely a product of situation.
Els Posted October 24, 2011 Posted October 24, 2011 Uh-huh, which explains why you said 'with women, you get what you are willing to pay for', yeah? If you yourself find the high-maintenance sorts the 'best', it isn't really anyone's fault but your own.
CarrieInNYC Posted October 24, 2011 Posted October 24, 2011 Speaking for myself and pretty much all of my female friends, there is no dinner nice enough that I'd be willing to put up with the company of a guy I didn't like in order to eat it. Where are these women who go out with guys they aren't into just for free food? I never meet them! Anyway, I always offer to split. If a guy takes me up on it, it doesn't alter my feelings for him one way or the other. Some guys won't, and I don't usually insist unless I have no intention of seeing him again. (If we're going to see each other again, I figure I can pay the next time or further on down the road when we're more comfortable). I really do not understand why this paying etiquette thing is such a big deal.
oldguy Posted October 24, 2011 Posted October 24, 2011 I really do not understand why this paying etiquette thing is such a big deal. Hmmm, I still hold the door for women but I do it as much for me I think. as for these, 'rules' that started this whole thing; I've never heard of such silly things & if they exist what does it say about your date, especially if dinner is fast food? LOL. That's just silly.
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