BaileyBoop Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 Last year I had a litter of puppies, the last puppy to go was my favorite.. He ended up going to a gorgeous guy who lives a couple hours away.. A month or so after he took the puppy we began talking to each other on facebook. We would talk for hours. We were talking almost every day, while he was at work or late at night. A month after that we ended up meeting at a dog park. Everything was going smooth, he asked me to go have coffee with him.. Now, i will admit i've been out of the dating scene for sometime now. I didn't mean to turn him down but i did.. After that we were talking regularly, he would give me updates about the puppy.. And I started to like this guy even more.. Over the summer, I went to see the dog he got from me. Our dogs played and we chatted. I couldn't help but check him out and daydream.. After i got home we chatted more than usual. He kept trying to get me to move out there, telling me he would help. All throughout the summer he's been telling me that I should come visit, if i ever need a place to stay don't hesitate to ask.. Well he messages me today asking about some training advice with his dog.. Obviously i tell him what to do.. I'm sure he knows what to do, he just wants to talk.. So midway into the conversation he tells me he really wants to get together soon.. And then tells me what days he has off.. I told him i would come out for a day.. He suggested that i come stay for 3 days and leave before he goes to work.. At this point, i'm screaming with joy!! My dogs are going nuts because i'm so excited!! Okay, so now to the point.. Is this guy interested or is he just being friendly?? I like him a lot, i've never expressed how i felt about him (I don't want to look like an idiot), we both have a lot in common.. And i really could see us getting together !! Link to post Share on other sites
confused kitty Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 Go for it girl!! It sounds like hes interested in being more than friends... If thats all he wanted he wouldnt keep askin you to come visit and certainly wouldnt expect you to move out there - take things slowly if your unsure, but by all means take him up on his offer and see how it goes.... after all it would be rude not to Good luck and keep us all posted on how it goes!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author BaileyBoop Posted October 19, 2011 Author Share Posted October 19, 2011 Go for it girl!! It sounds like hes interested in being more than friends... If thats all he wanted he wouldnt keep askin you to come visit and certainly wouldnt expect you to move out there - take things slowly if your unsure, but by all means take him up on his offer and see how it goes.... after all it would be rude not to Good luck and keep us all posted on how it goes!!! OMG :D , I really hope your right.. As of right now i'll be going to stay with him for 2 nights and 3 days.. I'm really excited and nervous about it.. I don't want anything to ruin it.. Link to post Share on other sites
confused kitty Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 I know exactly how your feeling and im a little jelous if im honest hehe! Best of luck with it and enjoy your trip and as i said keep us all posted Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky_One Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 Which one of you is married? And why in the world would you EVER go stay for so long with a man who is a virtual stranger? Don't you consider that dangerous at all?? Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 What's the catch? Are you dating someone? Or does he have a girlfriend? Just wondering why this is posted in the OW/OM section..Unless it's a mistake and you meant to post it general relationships or dating section. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BaileyBoop Posted October 19, 2011 Author Share Posted October 19, 2011 What's the catch? Are you dating someone? Or does he have a girlfriend? Just wondering why this is posted in the OW/OM section..Unless it's a mistake and you meant to post it general relationships or dating section. I'm new here, its not suppose to be in here... Link to post Share on other sites
Author BaileyBoop Posted October 19, 2011 Author Share Posted October 19, 2011 Which one of you is married? And why in the world would you EVER go stay for so long with a man who is a virtual stranger? Don't you consider that dangerous at all?? Neither one.. Because he isn't a stranger.. I've met him in person twice. I've spoken to him for the past year.. I feel as if i know him.. I don't consider it dangerous. If i thought it was dangerous, i wouldn't do it.. I'm much smarter than that! Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 It is curious that said man, after one meeting on his home turf, was trying to get the OP to move to where he lives and, now, she's again traveling to his location. If I have the timeline right, he came to adopt the dog and that's when they met. Bla, bla, then they meet at a dog park in some neutral location. Then she visits him a month later to see the dog he adopted from her. That's when he starts trying to convince her to move. Odd, they haven't officially dated but he'd like her to move, is willing to help her move and is offering her a room any time she wants to visit. Hmm.... Is there like any chance that he has sensed that you're just completely smitten with him? Would you say this is usual dating behavior for yourself, historically? Welcome to LS Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 Neither one.. Because he isn't a stranger.. I've met him in person twice. I've spoken to him for the past year.. I feel as if i know him.. I don't consider it dangerous. If i thought it was dangerous, i wouldn't do it.. I'm much smarter than that! I wonder how many missing people felt they knew the people that helped them vanish? Anybody got stats on that? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 Well, she has spent time with him at least twice substantially, and one of those times evidently at where he lives so, if he's another Ted Bundy, he's taking his time. OP, have you ever had a LDR (long distance relationship)? Do you know what those entail? What's your goal here, in general? Are you looking for some distraction and fun or a LTR? IMO, it's important to have a plan for yourself and work that plan. If it's fun with a gorgeous guy without any discernible plans for the future, then that. If a LTR, then that. Frankly, if he wasn't trying to get you to move and visit and was instead coming to visit you and staying in a hotel while there, I'd probably be wishing you well. Something just has my spidey sense prickled. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BaileyBoop Posted October 20, 2011 Author Share Posted October 20, 2011 It is curious that said man, after one meeting on his home turf, was trying to get the OP to move to where he lives and, now, she's again traveling to his location. If I have the timeline right, he came to adopt the dog and that's when they met. Bla, bla, then they meet at a dog park in some neutral location. Then she visits him a month later to see the dog he adopted from her. That's when he starts trying to convince her to move. Odd, they haven't officially dated but he'd like her to move, is willing to help her move and is offering her a room any time she wants to visit. Hmm.... Is there like any chance that he has sensed that you're just completely smitten with him? Would you say this is usual dating behavior for yourself, historically? Welcome to LS Wrong, I met up with him the winter of 2010.. Then we met up again the summer of 2011.. The only time he's came here is to pick the puppy up. We did meet up in the neutral dog park.. I'm sure he has sensed i like him.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BaileyBoop Posted October 20, 2011 Author Share Posted October 20, 2011 Well, she has spent time with him at least twice substantially, and one of those times evidently at where he lives so, if he's another Ted Bundy, he's taking his time. OP, have you ever had a LDR (long distance relationship)? Do you know what those entail? What's your goal here, in general? Are you looking for some distraction and fun or a LTR? IMO, it's important to have a plan for yourself and work that plan. If it's fun with a gorgeous guy without any discernible plans for the future, then that. If a LTR, then that. Frankly, if he wasn't trying to get you to move and visit and was instead coming to visit you and staying in a hotel while there, I'd probably be wishing you well. Something just has my spidey sense prickled. Wow, if that isn't rude!! He isn't Ted Bundy.. I've had a long distance relationship.. For a year or so & then i moved to be with him.. I'm looking for a relationship with this guy, i like him a lot.. I wasn't asking for relationship advice when posting this, i was just asking if he was being friendly or if he was interested.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BaileyBoop Posted October 20, 2011 Author Share Posted October 20, 2011 I wonder how many missing people felt they knew the people that helped them vanish? Anybody got stats on that? Wow, if you aren't rude!! Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 OP, you post on a public forum and you get what you get. Up to you what you do with it. If he was interested in dating you he'd have asked you out on a date in your locale and would travel two hours to take you on that date. That's my assessment . If you want rude, we can go there. So far, the responses have been respectful and on-topic. Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky_One Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 Wow, if you aren't rude!! No one has been rude here. People are giving you honest opinions/assessments of something that you posted on a public message board. I agree with Carhill. Yes he is interested, but what exactly is he interested in? He is interested in making you do all the work/travel and is interested in having sex with you. This guy IS almost a stranger. You have only spent a few hours with him in public. You have FB'd with him for a year. You ONLY live two hours apart, and it has taken him 12 months to make concrete plans. I know you believe that you know him as well as his mama does, but I would guess that there's a whole lot you DON'T know about him. So yes, to answer your question, he is interested. But IMHO he's not necessarily interested in anything but having a woman drive 2 hours to come stay with him for some convenient sex. Link to post Share on other sites
alexandria35 Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 I agree that nobody here as been rude to you. People are simply posting their opinions based on what you have said. This guy may be interested, he may even be serious about you moving there. Sounds like you are planning to visit him which is ok I guess but something is off here. First of all there is the whole wanting you to move there. Why? He hasn't even properly dated you yet, but he is wanting you to pack up and move there. That's doing things out of order don't you think? You may have been talking to him for a year but it doesn't sound like a relationship or like he has put much effort into it. Personally I know of a few people in my real life who have taken off to go be with people they barely know. Oh they say they know them because of the hours they have spent together on the phone, but once they got to know them in real life they realize they didn't really know them as well as they thought they did. To date all these relationships have been castastrophe's and the people I know who were involved regret throwing caution to wind. You say you have already moved before for a long distance relationship and it sounds like you are considering doing so again. Why do you always have to do all the work? Your life is important too and there is more to live than looking for mr right Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky_One Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 OP, go read on the Dating forum, and look for a thread by a poster called Torn Curtain. Enlightening, to say the least. Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 Wow, if you aren't rude!! I ditto carhill. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 OP, go read on the Dating forum, and look for a thread by a poster called Torn Curtain. Enlightening, to say the least. Here's the thread Search the poster's past threads for the backstory. IIRC, this 'relationship' had gone on for about a year, online and over the phone. One anecdote does not make a rule of thumb, but anecdotes do lend insight into commonalities in interpersonal relationships. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BaileyBoop Posted October 21, 2011 Author Share Posted October 21, 2011 Sorry for accusing Carhill & bentnotbroken of being rude.. After posting this thread yesterday my day started to get crappy and reading those 2 comments was the last thing i needed.. I really do like this guy.. So after reading some stuff online and on here, i'm considering going and staying with him.. Not sure if its true, but most guys expect something in return for you staying there. I'm definitely not that kind of girl.. After going and visiting him, i told him that i like it out where he lives. Where i live at the moment jobs are very limited.. I currently don't have a job, i'm living off savings.. So i'm sure he just wants the best for me and for me to move out there and get a good job.. alexandria35- idk why i do all of the work, i guess i don't mind it.. when i like someone i really jump in.. Link to post Share on other sites
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