Author Nickster1 Posted January 18, 2012 Author Share Posted January 18, 2012 Update: She came back with the young child. She is acting real cold. The interesting part is that she started using the cell phone to call a man that was in friendship with her family. Seems like there is a new romance story...I think someone had told her to stop using the house phone so she only called him using her cell phone. So far talked to him for couple of hours in the one day that she is here... I wonder if i should confront her on that? tap the cell phone? or simply let her continue this new long distance romance. Just to make it clear, she sleep in another room on the other side of the house. Link to post Share on other sites
RobD70 Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 I wonder if i should confront her on that? tap the cell phone? or simply let her continue this new long distance romance. Don't bother, its over with her so what she does now is irrelevant. Think of it like this: She dead to you. She is a cancer to you so your goal is to get her out of your life as quickly and painlessly as possible. Don't get caught up in any drama about her "love life", just take care of business and plan for your new life without her. She is nothing to you now. You have to be cold to her for the same reasons she is cold to you, your marriage is over. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nickster1 Posted January 20, 2012 Author Share Posted January 20, 2012 So the curiosity killed me (again) and i had to find out...I installed a tap software on her cell phone. As I suspected, she was screwing this new guy. And just consider that she was overseas for 2.5 weeks and it was enough for her to open up her legs for the guy. She told him that she cheated on me before but he corrected her and said that she had a good excuse... Still, listening to one of these sex calls was pretty tough on me. Of course, i asked her when she arrived if she had any sexual contact with any man? she said of course not... She still insists that she would wait for me as she only cares about her boys and is not interested in any relationship with any other man or one night stands, etc. What a liar? wow...It is not that I was considering to come back to her...but still... On another note, when she talked to her friend (girl), she was telling her that all the last 10 years she was only caring about me (her husband) and the kids and never thought about herself...and her friend agreed. My W said that she thinks she should start thinking about herself now... And I'm saying to myself....YEAH RIGHT! She has been doing all these men, leaving sick kids at home to go to a dirty motels just to screw... Link to post Share on other sites
2long Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 Why do you keep tor2ring yourself? The trip overseas was a huge waste of money. Your snooping is a complete waste of time and energy. When are you going 2 make a stand for yourself and your kids? -ol' 2long Link to post Share on other sites
Owl Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 So...when you asked her if she'd been with anyone else...I'm assuming you said "That's not true", and then produced the recorded calls? What was her reaction to that. If you didn't call her out on her lie...why the heck not? It's not like you've got anything less to lose at this point. Might as well enjoy the show. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nickster1 Posted January 23, 2012 Author Share Posted January 23, 2012 The trip overseas was a combination of check the issue with the OM bio father, but also to visit my family (I also have family in that country) So it was not waste of money. I really had fun and enjoyed the vacation. I didn't want to blow it the other day as I had to go out this weekend and decided to "use" her to babysit the kids... I'll probably need to bite the bullet and blow this story out now. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted January 23, 2012 Share Posted January 23, 2012 I said it earlier and I'll repeat. I'm leaving her. She will pack her crap and leave. I have no future with such a person. What happened to this statment? I thought she would be gone by now. You haven't moved any further on this than you did months ago. You are still spying on this woman and worrying about whether she loves you or not. What difference does any of what you are doing matter at this point? You have again awarded her infidelity with another vacation. You are a cuckold and I for one wish you would just admit it and stop acting as if you are gathering information about her for your imaginary divorce. Link to post Share on other sites
eamherst14051 Posted January 27, 2012 Share Posted January 27, 2012 Nickster1, a quick question. Has this board been beneficial? I know you are on at least one other so wanted to know how this one was doing for your welfare. Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nickster1 Posted January 27, 2012 Author Share Posted January 27, 2012 This board has been extremely beneficial. There are some great guys here that I love to hear their opinions. Although they sometimes think that I'm disconnected, unreal, fake, troll, or whatever. I still love what they have to say. And yes, it helps me a lot to handle my situation. The other forum also has some great minds that I like to hear. My decision has already been made; I'm just looking for the timing. Thank you all! Nickster1, a quick question. Has this board been beneficial? I know you are on at least one other so wanted to know how this one was doing for your welfare. Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Kidd Posted January 27, 2012 Share Posted January 27, 2012 When is she going to pack her stuff so you can leave? Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted January 27, 2012 Share Posted January 27, 2012 When is she going to pack her stuff so you can leave? He never answers that question, it's a waste of your time to ask. Link to post Share on other sites
rowell2024 Posted January 30, 2012 Share Posted January 30, 2012 My decision has already been made; I'm just looking for the timing. Thank you all! The timing's never good enough isn't it? Just admit it already. You just can't do it, can you? She has your balls in her purse. Why could she EVER respect you or the marriage? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nickster1 Posted January 30, 2012 Author Share Posted January 30, 2012 I confronted her during the weekend. It took me some time till she admitted that she had sex with the new guy over the 2.5 weeks she was overseas. I told her that i put her to a test to see if she could be loyal for two weeks. She did tell me prior to the trip that she would wait for me as long as needed...and that she doesn't want any relationship. Her only concern is her kids and family... Well, so i told her, "guess what, you failed". She was saying that she thought we are no longer together and all that nonsense. Then was telling me how a big mistake it was and how she wants us to fix it. I told her that i don't want her! (This really was the 1st time i actually said that to her...- for real!) I told her that i want a loyal woman, that i don't want to "share" my woman with another man. Told her she doesn't respect me and was shocked how she could not hold her pants/skirt up from a man that was nice to her, gave her couple of compliments, and she jumped to his bed... I told her that no man would respect her for that. But i wished her good luck with the new boyfriend. She was crying and asked me not to say that... "that" means me telling her that we are over. like O.V.E.R. I told her that i will help her find a place...she said she doesn't want nothing except me...then she started acting as she wants half of everything...probably to scare me. Although she is not on the house papers, and we were not officially married in the city records and all...she want me to sell the house. The time now is not right to do that. The market is not good and the house is not in a shape to sell it. I offered her an amount of money that i think is half of the equity...and she thinks I’m just fooling with her and that it is worth a lot more... She only looks at assets and doesn't care/know about the loans/liabilities/credit cards that back all that... Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted January 30, 2012 Share Posted January 30, 2012 If you really did tell her to leave, your FIRST STEP has to be to a lawyer. Do not agree to give her ANYTHING that your lawyer doesn't first agree to. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nickster1 Posted January 30, 2012 Author Share Posted January 30, 2012 I already talked to a lawyer about 3 months ago... I know that they all want to make money (this is their job). That way i will spend the money on lawyers instead of giving it to the kids. Still, i can call him any second and schedule appointment to get him on the case... maybe maybe we can settle this in nice way. Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted January 30, 2012 Share Posted January 30, 2012 I already talked to a lawyer about 3 months ago... I know that they all want to make money (this is their job). That way i will spend the money on lawyers instead of giving it to the kids. Still, i can call him any second and schedule appointment to get him on the case... maybe maybe we can settle this in nice way.Now you're just being ignorant. Lawyers do NOT just take your money that should have gone to your kids. Lawyers protect people like you, doormats, from being taken to the cleaners. Paying a lawyer 5% or 10% is chump change to what she is going to walk away with if you try to pretend she'll be nice. You already admitted that she changed her tune - in less than a day - from "don't leave me" to "I'm taking half your money." Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nickster1 Posted January 30, 2012 Author Share Posted January 30, 2012 But then she changed again to say that she wants nothing from me. Wants to be on her own, and want me. I know i'm not trusting anything that comes from her mouth, but on the other hand, a dog that barks aloud,doesn't usually bite. Now you're just being ignorant. Lawyers do NOT just take your money that should have gone to your kids. Lawyers protect people like you, doormats, from being taken to the cleaners. Paying a lawyer 5% or 10% is chump change to what she is going to walk away with if you try to pretend she'll be nice. You already admitted that she changed her tune - in less than a day - from "don't leave me" to "I'm taking half your money." Link to post Share on other sites
2long Posted January 30, 2012 Share Posted January 30, 2012 But then she changed again to say that she wants nothing from me. Wants to be on her own, and want me. I know i'm not trusting anything that comes from her mouth, but on the other hand, a dog that barks aloud,doesn't usually bite. Are you willing 2 gamble your and your kids financial fu2re on that? I wouldn't. -ol' 2long Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted January 30, 2012 Share Posted January 30, 2012 (edited) I told her that i will help her find a place... Why? So you can plant spy equipment in her new place? So basically she has done the same thing she did before and she hasn't been kicked out of the house yet. Why is it your place to help her find a new home? Isn't that her new boyfriend's job? Nickster nothing new is happening here and you know it. I'll bet you anything that she will still be there next month this time (if she chooses to be) and you will be seeking new proof of her infidelity. It's as if you are getting 'off' on it. Edited January 30, 2012 by stillafool Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nickster1 Posted January 31, 2012 Author Share Posted January 31, 2012 Ladygrey, You can relax, I'm past that already. Yes, I acknowledge that it took me some time to get to this point. But that's it, she is out of my life, I told her that explicitly. She understands that. As soon as she moves out, i will not spy on her, i do not care anymore. Her issues will be somebody else's problems. I gave up on her. There are people who do get off on being a masochist and who enjoy the attention they get because of the pity factor. It's difficult to understand how someone could be in denial for such a long period of time when the act itself (the bj he caught her giving to the om) happened and he saw it with his own eyes and what's worse is that she continues to lie and still is screwing around on him and Nick KNOWS it. Maybe spying and snooping gives Nick an illusion of control. Link to post Share on other sites
oren ish Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 i sure hope your not a troll man because its pretty sic what ur doing if you are in light of the sensitive topic we deal with here... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nickster1 Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 i sure hope your not a troll man because its pretty sic what ur doing if you are in light of the sensitive topic we deal with here... What are you talking about? btw: There's been a lot of movement, she is moving out in 1-2 weeks I'm pretty happy. Details soon. Link to post Share on other sites
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