singlelife Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 The whole waiting around and and saving yourself is overated. It's interesting that the more you sex up women they come out of the woodworks. I guess the word gets around that you're a good lay and a gentleman and others want some. Not really sure why this happens, but ladies, I am learning you like to have fun, and not be stressed out with a bf. Guys, we got to get with it. Link to post Share on other sites
InJest Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 It's really about confidence. The more women you ****, the less pressed you are to get laid, and women notice that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author singlelife Posted October 21, 2011 Author Share Posted October 21, 2011 It's really about confidence. The more women you ****, the less pressed you are to get laid, and women notice that. Maybe that's it. Good point. Because I haven't really been trying to get laid and they just keep coming. They do seem to be more comfortable. Link to post Share on other sites
silvermercy Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 It's really about confidence. The more women you ****, the less pressed you are to get laid, and women notice that. I also agree it's this, and I say that as a female. You may give the vibe that you're not desperate for sex but would rather prefer a relationship, too. This way many females are attracted to you. However, personally once I've learnt about the real number of females before me, I would definitely reconsider continuing the relationship to the next level- because who's to say I'm not another number? LOL In other words, a man may attract lots of women, but he doesn't get to keep anyone since he's deemed undesirable as relationship material. Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGal Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 If I was interested in a man and I heard he sleeps around, I would be immediately turned off. But it depends what you and the women you speak of are looking for. If its purely sex, then you seem to have the right approach. If you want a long term relationship, I'm not sure this way will work. Link to post Share on other sites
InJest Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 (edited) I've had sex with about 30 partners. Whenever a woman asks me how many, I say 7. What's your remedy for that, Inspector Gadget? ScienceGal, just hearing that someone sleeps around is a turn off? Do you just accept statements like that from anyone, or do you make sure they're credible before completely disregarding someone you don't know? Edited October 21, 2011 by InJest Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGal Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 I have been with two men that have had many partners; in fact, my ex didn't even know his number. All I care about is who a man is today and what he wants from me... If he slept around in the past, but doesn't anymore, that's fine by me. I wouldn't want to be judged by past choices. Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGal Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 I've had sex with about 30 partners. Whenever a woman asks me how many, I say 7. What's your remedy for that, Inspector Gadget? ScienceGal, just hearing that someone sleeps around is a turn off? Do you just accept statements like that from anyone, or do you make sure they're credible before completely disregarding someone you don't know? You added to your post Hearing that would make me more cautious. I dated a guy that a lot of people warned me was a 'player' (I hate that term). He was a perfect gentleman, but then I found out he was dating/sleeping with other women. This is after I told him I don't multi-date and I don't sleep around. Point is, I will always make my own judgement, but if multiple people feel the need to warn me, I will pay extra close attention. Link to post Share on other sites
Author singlelife Posted October 21, 2011 Author Share Posted October 21, 2011 I think the fact that guys aren't desperate is a turn on for women. Link to post Share on other sites
grkBoy Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 It's really about confidence. The more women you ****, the less pressed you are to get laid, and women notice that. That's also why some guys become doormats and others become playas. It's amazing how much a man's confidence level at times can be directly attributed to how much acceptance or rejection he gets from women. In most cases though, the guy who bangs a lot of women obviously has many qualities women want in a man. I knew a guy who is a true "ladies man". He had several women all banging him. No dating, nothing. ALL of these women were hot, and all wanted him to be their boyfriend and even future husband. WHY? 1) He was charming and charismatic 2) He had a body like an adonis 3) He had a handsome face and hair...dark-skinned Italian 4) He had a lot of money and was a man about town 5) He was supposedly "amazing" in bed (as one girl told me) I've seen women who honestly want a man who has experience, but not so much that they worry he's got an STD or he'll just "pump and dump". It's why I tell the older virgins not to divulge their lack of experience, and just get over the hump. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrlonelyone Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 Like mama always said. "Your more likely to get a job when you already have one. I don't know why it works that way but it does." A man/woman will get more attention when they aren't available for some reason. While people with little relationship experience send up red flags. That is not unlike employers not wanting to take the long term unemployed back into the work force. The moral is get that job at Burger King before trying for that job at a fortune 1000 company. At least that gets the unemployed stank offa ya. It smells like fear and all mammals hate it. Link to post Share on other sites
mike111 Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 The whole waiting around and and saving yourself is overated. It's interesting that the more you sex up women they come out of the woodworks. I guess the word gets around that you're a good lay and a gentleman and others want some. Not really sure why this happens, but ladies, I am learning you like to have fun, and not be stressed out with a bf. Guys, we got to get with it. I think it has more to do with confidence. Knowing that women are attracted to you really boost one's ego, and you radiate that confidence. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 The rich get richer. That's the way the world has always been. Now what should a guy do when not even Taco Bell will hire you? Link to post Share on other sites
DenumChkn Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 In my opinion, if you constantly need to be up in some puss just to have self confidence that is some deep seeded insecurity and personality flaw. People on the break up forums are always stressing how you should become comfortable and happy within your own skin before moving on to a new relationship. I think the same applies when you are single. You should not need any validation from the opposite sex in order to believe that you are the ****. Your validation should come from within yourself and your level of happiness with where you currently are in life. Obviously getting laid feels great and can be a nice confidence booster, but I no longer view it as a necessary one. Just like Adam Carolla always used to say on Loveline, "Sex is great, but it's not the real thing" Link to post Share on other sites
The Tiger Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 The rich get richer. That's the way the world has always been. Now what should a guy do when not even Taco Bell will hire you? Go to school. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 In my opinion, if you constantly need to be up in some puss just to have self confidence that is some deep seeded insecurity and personality flaw. People on the break up forums are always stressing how you should become comfortable and happy within your own skin before moving on to a new relationship. I think the same applies when you are single. You should not need any validation from the opposite sex in order to believe that you are the ****. Your validation should come from within yourself and your level of happiness with where you currently are in life. Obviously getting laid feels great and can be a nice confidence booster, but I no longer view it as a necessary one. Just like Adam Carolla always used to say on Loveline, "Sex is great, but it's not the real thing" Try having self-validation when you never get laid. Link to post Share on other sites
Author singlelife Posted October 21, 2011 Author Share Posted October 21, 2011 Women just crave confident dudes. It's an emotional/psychological thing. Go get laid then they will come. I'm telling you. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 Women just crave confident dudes. It's an emotional/psychological thing. Go get laid then they will come. I'm telling you. Want to pass some strange my way? Link to post Share on other sites
InJest Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 Passing girls off doesn't work, unless they're whores. You can do a lot to build confidence. Find something you're good at, focus on that, and it will build from there. Link to post Share on other sites
Author singlelife Posted October 21, 2011 Author Share Posted October 21, 2011 Tag! lol. you're it. Link to post Share on other sites
AHardDaysNight Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 As an older virgin, this does not help me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author singlelife Posted October 21, 2011 Author Share Posted October 21, 2011 Passing girls off doesn't work, unless they're whores. You can do a lot to build confidence. Find something you're good at, focus on that, and it will build from there. Yup!!! It sounds hard but women love it when guys have a life. Link to post Share on other sites
grkBoy Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 Dam I wanna f*ck him and I'm a hetero guy. Yeah...he was seen as the dream alpha male women wanted...but his major catch: a) He could not be faithful, nor did he want to be b) He never wanted to be married or in a monogamous RL Yet many women all tried like crazy to "change his mind". One even somehow got knocked up with his baby, but he still won't commit to a RL with her, despite that he gives good child support and is a good father to the kid. I look at him as the cosmic joke many men and women play on themselves in life. A real-life "Mr. Big" with a line of "Carrie Bradshaws" chasing him. I like to use him as an example of many things...of what women REALLY want in a man, but also as the poster-boy for the "impossible-to-get" men women crave and wish they could tame into a marriage. I still think a lot of his confidence is that he's really never had trouble getting women in his life. When one isn't rejected for years and gone through hell to get women to like him, then of course the guy will be confident. I've known a few others who always got the women since high school...and they were insanely confident because of that worship. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 Yeah...he was seen as the dream alpha male women wanted...but his major catch: a) He could not be faithful, nor did he want to be b) He never wanted to be married or in a monogamous RL Yet many women all tried like crazy to "change his mind". One even somehow got knocked up with his baby, but he still won't commit to a RL with her, despite that he gives good child support and is a good father to the kid. I look at him as the cosmic joke many men and women play on themselves in life. A real-life "Mr. Big" with a line of "Carrie Bradshaws" chasing him. I like to use him as an example of many things...of what women REALLY want in a man, but also as the poster-boy for the "impossible-to-get" men women crave and wish they could tame into a marriage. I still think a lot of his confidence is that he's really never had trouble getting women in his life. When one isn't rejected for years and gone through hell to get women to like him, then of course the guy will be confident. I've known a few others who always got the women since high school...and they were insanely confident because of that worship. This reminds me of Jon Hamm's character in the movie Bridesmaids...that movie and the main character kinda pissed me off... Link to post Share on other sites
DenumChkn Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 I know what you are saying somedude. Trust me I have gone extended periods of my life (re: years) without sex or a relationship and it nagged and nagged at me. All that inner nagging dwindled my own self confidence. I recently got dumped in the longest relationship I had ever had (6 months) and am seeing things much more clearly now. The relationship was never what I needed for validation, it was getting my own ass in gear and taking action in my own life. However it is a bit of a catch 22.. Had I not had the relationship and the experience of heart break and loss, I probably wouldn't have ruminated on it and come to the conclusion I am at now. It is kind of one of those things where you have to experience the highs and lows of it first hand in order to get to a point where you stop giving a crap. I have not been with a girl since she dumped me and it has been probably a little over 2 months since I got laid and I really could care less. I'm talking to other girls now and going out and having fun, but I'm no longer emotionally invested in the whole 'I must get laid tonight in order to validate my continued existence on this earth' game. If it happens, sweet, if not, nothing really changes and I'll continue going about my business and living life to my fullest capabilities. Link to post Share on other sites
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