MindAlteration Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 I am a 21 yrold girl who knows right from wrong, but in this case i feel as i have failed myself as a good lover and person. So if someone could please just give me a few words of advice it would be greatly appreciated. A few nights ago, I had been sitting at home while my boyfriend (of six months) is at his house doing his own thing. I get called out to the bar with a few friends later that evening (which included my ex of three years being there). Ive been on medication that prohibits me from drinking, but for some reason that night I felt like I needed to go out. After a few drinks and open conversations, a few friends of mine and I head to my ex's house to hang out. By the end of the night I had started talking to my ex about issues that i havent talked to anyone about in awhile. So i decide to stay. We lay down in his bed (thinking i was just going to fall asleep), and he turns and kisses me. I kiss back but tell him we should just go to sleep. I know it was wrong of me to even stay in the first place, but something inside me didnt feel bad for what i was doing. I have cried and tried talking to my mother about it, but i just need a third party opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 you knew what you were doing by going out to the bar, not to mention with your X there. It was premeditated. So maybe you should come clean with your boyfriend and give him the opportunity to decide if he wants to continue in a relationship that cheats, and that doesn't really feel bad about it. Or just do him the outright favor of breaking it off with him. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 I am a 21 yrold girl who knows right from wrong, but in this case i feel as i have failed myself as a good lover and person. You do know right from wrong. You just didn't give a damn that time. You have failed as a good lover and person, yes. But what is done is done, so how are you going to handle it? Cover up bad behaviour with more bad behaviour, or come clean and be honest? So if someone could please just give me a few words of advice it would be greatly appreciated. Tell your BF you have cheated on him and beg for his forgiveness. Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 Be honest with your boyfriend. If the roles were reversed how would you be feeling? You totally disrespected your boyfriend and your relationship with him. Link to post Share on other sites
mike111 Posted October 21, 2011 Share Posted October 21, 2011 Alcohol and meds may had exasperated the situation. But still, it's no excuse. You should think about coming clean and telling him what happened. Hopefully he can handle it. But let him make up his own mind after that. Link to post Share on other sites
jnj express Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 If you are seriously committed, you should have gone home when your night of barhopping was over You chose to go to your lovers house, and you knew what might happen, yet you still chose to go Tell your BF, so he at least can make an informed decision, about whether he wants to stay with you, and trust you If you don't tell and he finds out another way, it will go a he*l of a lot worse for you Also by telling you will relieve yourself of your guilt One other thing, you need to find out why you DID this thing in the 1st place---something caused this, and you need to find out what that thing is. Link to post Share on other sites
imagine Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 What are you going to do in future? What would you want your b/f to do now to you if he did the same? Link to post Share on other sites
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