Sudden no contact

[mtd4249]

I realise this might not be the most appropriate section for this posting but I'm really in need of some insights.

 

I'm a 42 year-old male living in Australia and for about 6 weeks I was in email contact with a 35 year-old female who lives in a small town in the Arctic circle of Canada. We met through eHarmony and our email exchanges were always vibrant and long - sometimes 5 or 6 pages. Last weekend, we decided to talk by voice on Skype .... the conversation lasted 6 hours and it was very natural and comfortable. Two days later, we had another chat for 4 hours and then again on Thursday night for another 4 hours.

 

The conversations seemed to go well ... perhaps the only problem was that she would be awake until 2am or 3am, but I would always email to thank her and let her know it was appreciated, and she would respond by saying she felt it was worth it. Her staying up to talk was especially notable because she is having one of the busiest weeks of the year. Things seemed to be going really well .... we both admitted that we missed talking to each other (that's why we chatted twice during the week because the original intention was to chat this weekend); she sent me a gift this week for my birthday and I sent her a package with a webcam and book she wanted; we emailed each other every other day; and we even started an online journal.

 

The last conversation seemed to go good .... we talked about a whole range of things, including when and where we would meet face to face (which we decided to talk about more next time because of the clashes with work etc). We even joked about where our 2nd and 3rd dates would be. Perhaps the only thing that might be miscontrused was a conversation about eHarmony. She told me how she hadn't had much contact from matches because she was only on there a couple of weeks before I came along. She asked me if I had much contact with matches and I said there were some, but it soon fizzled out. I told her the story of one who came along before this girl and who was always distracted with her work while she talked to me and that she wanted me to visit her in America but could only afford 2 days! I told her that there was some overlap in my contact with this one, but quickly lost interest in the one who was always distracted once the connection with this girl through email became stronger. I told her that several weeks ago (well before me and this girl in Canada spoke on the phone but overlapping with our email exchanges), I told the other one it wasn't going to work out but she continued to email me and even call several times a day. I made it clear I have no interest in this other girl and she suggested I email her and tell her that I'm now interested in someone else. In fact, I did that and emailed the girl in Canada to tell her that I told the other one once and for all to not contact me because I'm interested in someone else. I'm not sure she thought that the overlapping contact I was having was bad - from my perspective, I was losing interest in the one that came first and I was just establishing a connection with the girl in Canada. Maybe she misconstrued things because I'm fairly certain that she was only communicating with me.

 

In any event, she didn't seem to be upset by this at the time - she even joked that she would email this other woman and tell her to back off because she is my wife!! After the conversation, I emailed her to thank her for staying up late etc. and she emailed back to arrange a time to talk on Sunday and said that she was going to be the first person to wish me a happy birthday on that day!

 

Overnight I received a text message from her that said she would be online until midnight and she was letting me know in case I had a chance to call. I came online at about 9.30pm and she wasn't on ... which was out of character because she usually does what she says she will. After a while, I sent her a text message and email to say I would step away a moment but would check every now and then to see if she's on. At about 10.30pm, I noticed the messages I sent on Skype that were pending had gone through (she had logged in around 10.30pm according to Skype and then was appearing offline -- and she always appeared online in previous conversations). I decided to send a message to see if she was online but invisible and it appears she was because that message and another 15 mins later went through. But she didn't respond to the first messages I sent or those ones. At about 11.30pm, I decided to send her a text message to check if she was okay because this seemed so out of character and to ask if she still wanted to talk on Sunday as planned because I wasn't sure what went wrong this time. Again, she didn't respond.

 

I really am confused. It's almost like being stood up and things aren't adding up. She didn't respond to any of my messages; she was online but invisible for a period of time and didn't contact me; she didn't email; and we started an online journal this week and with the first entry she wrote her comments but with the second one (after the call on Thursday) she didn't write anything (although I know she checked from the login information).

 

What could be going on? Why would she tell me she would be online and then ignore me? I feel like she is upset about something .... but really given there has been no commitment (implied or otherwise) until we started talking this week, what could possibly be the issue?

 

I really don't know what to do ... it's playing on my mind and need to know if something is wrong. It's now 8.30am there .. should I call her and see if she is okay?

[TheJiltedGeneration]

hmm, it's its just today and she hasn't been ignoring you constantly, then its probably some sort of difficulty on her end thats keeping her occupied or she's incapacitated somehow, Dont panic.. Just give her time to respond she'll probably txt/msg back when she's ready.. ^_^ for now I would "try" to occupy yourself with something else so you keep fabricating what ifs on your mind, its probably something minor in the end ( Though tbh I cant say much about that XD)..