searching4ans Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 It's been approx. 4 months of No Contact since her breaking it off, other then her trying to get an update on my life through a mutual friend online. But the question I pose is this, is it more so relapsing to the once familiar "drug of her" by sending a friendly, civil message saying "i'm happy your happy and i know we'll be able to talk more come the future" or a step in the right direction of getting the nagging pain of her off my mind, which is causing me to lose concentration and focus in day to day things, especially when tired. any guidance would be appreciated. Link to post Share on other sites
light_vader Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 or a step in the right direction of getting the nagging pain of her off my mind No it's not. No contact is good and should always be. Yo be honest I don't believe in that "we can be friends" afterwards... it's just too weird and too "other dimension" thing to do. 4 months no contact is great, I've been 3 months I think. And for me it's really though as I work with her and have to see her with the guy she cheated on me with, and all the other guys that would laugh with "us" and now just hit on her like there's no tomorrow. So trust me, if you're in a position where you don't even have to see her, that is great, and you should be thankful for it. For others like me, the struggle is tougher but somehow we manage to make it through the day. So, no contact forever is the best thing to do and after a while you won't even think about it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author searching4ans Posted October 25, 2011 Author Share Posted October 25, 2011 ahah well said. for some reason i thought i was strong enough to say "i'm just happy you;re happy and know that there's no ill will" as i thought it was the necessary closure step but as soon as she replied over facebook with: " life's going great, its been killing me to talk to you and update you on how good **** is going and i just realized how much you did for me and you were a great guy... but let me crawl back into bed with the guy who caught me on the rebound" speech you;re right, it just built up more resentment and made me want to send the msot hateful, spiteful dark reply ever but i let logic win over emotion and jsut ignored it and am moving on you're right, the "friends" after thing is weird and until its been years and you have something solid, it'll only bring bout more resentment, which it has aha power to you though bro. to have to see her everyday is a whole nother ball game. i think 500 days of summer is such a class movie too for dudes likes us you know Link to post Share on other sites
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