Why do I feel so outside the circle? There must be others, right?

[confusedashell]

So, after moving on with my life and 're-finding' myself on a long holiday, i come back invigorated, fresh and upbeat. I find that i no longer want to involve myself in some of my old friends habits. So really, i stop seeing and hanging around with them as much. Now, making friends again with the same kids i used to go school with (a few years ago), i find i don't really have much in common with them.

 

I'm almost 19. I feel emotionally so older. Can you lose senses of humour? When i were younger, i was famed for my humour, and so it'd won me many, many loyal and sincere friends. I had so much to talk about, so much so 'in-tune' with others. SO much to joke about.

 

Yet now, when talking with people, i find i'm talking sociological, warning other people about mistakes they might make, telling people off for doing things - like i'm their mother. I'm just trying to stop them making the same mistaks as i did. But should i?

 

So, as said earlier, i'm a teenager yet i like to steer conversations about the future, employment, business, house prices - basically, anything that has 'real' priority. Though they may not say it, i know none of them have a clue about it. They'd rather talk about t.v. shows, cars, jokes and latterly girls. Don't get me wrong, i am interested in these things, very interested, but i'd prefer it not to be the same all the time.

 

Ok, so i joke around, quite a lot, but it's more like clowning around. Yet, some of their jokes seem so 'immature', only a few understand mine. By now, i know what you're thinking, you're friends with the wrong people, but am i? Is it just me?

 

My friends are great as friends, yet i don't really connect with them as much as i'd like, i think they're oblivious to this. They just seem so shallow and one-dimensional and me, i feel so open. Am i depressed? Is this some sort of illness of mine? Why do i feel so different? Sure, tomorrow, i may forget i even posted this, go out, have a laugh - but that will be tomorrow. That's how i find girls get attracted to me. But then i have moments like i am now, and this, i think drives them off. Do i think too much? I reckon i do, but is it over obsessive? Or is this normal? Does everyone think like this?

 

I go out, on the pull, have a drink and things are normal, and i have a great time. So are my friends. They clearly prefer the more drunker side of me. Is this because i say what i think? Or because i forget about all this "im so much more intellectual than you"? Perhaps i expect too much of them?

 

And then i get moody like i am now, my girlfriends steer clear of me and i don't feel so conversational, more moaning about this and that? What brings it on? Am i dissatisfied with something in my life? I would love if there was anyone reading this who has been (or not been) through these situations, your thought would be well relieved.

 

ps. a little comic relief; i'm not gonna commit suicide.

[moimeme]

As you mature and come into your own, you will find that you grow differently from others in many ways. Your interests may run to things more intellectual. This is not the preference of everyone. Doesn't mean anything is wrong with either you or them; just that you need to learn to enjoy your friends for their good qualities and seek out other friends with whom you'll be more in tune.

[Papillon]

You're becoming a man - it's a frightening journey, as you're going to be reevaluating your role in life, and reinventing yourself, unconsiously.

 

When we're teenagers, we have that strange paradox of being EXTREMELY self-involved, yet not really having our own identity. As we get older, we start defining ourselves, and placing our stamp on the world. When the day comes where we place our stamp on the world, moreso than it places it's stamp on us, that's when we've grown up.

 

We all go through this, and it seems that you are an intelligent guy, so you'll be fine.

 

All the best!

[gypsy_siren]

It sounds to me as if you have simply outgrown your friends. Perhaps you long for a more carefree time in your life, so you try to hang on, but the other side of you realizes that this is a time in your life that is coming to an end.

 

There is nothing wrong with growing and changing. Your friends will do this, too, at their own pace. Some of you may grow in the same direction, and others not, which can be painful and confusing to once-close friends.

 

Instead of fighting this, do what feels right to you. If you want to go out and drink, then do so. But don't do it for anyone but you. No longer doing things simply because the crowd wants you to is the first sign of true maturity, and it seems like you have already realized this.

 

Just be yourself .. this will enable you to meet new people who share your same vision and have the same priorities.

[ashy11]

Well im only 15 and Im already feeling like that. I used to be so layed back, talking to everyone, being myself and always laughing with my friends. Now it's so much harder I just feel like I can't be myself anymore and I miss myself so much but how do I get the old me back? really how do you get your old self back? I just want to be the person I was just not even 1 year ago. Be the person everyone was like she is so nice and fun. The person that was so close with her friends and never got mad or grouchy and was always a good laugh? How do I do this when I all of a sudden feel funny and self-contious about even making a joke? Is it just a faze or am I thinking about it to much and I really am behind this shadow somewhere. How do I stop thinking and obsessing?