Samantha16 Posted May 19, 2004 Share Posted May 19, 2004 I keep having dreams that my bf fools around with another girl. Why can't I get over that past and my fears and just trust him. He never cheated, but we broke up a few times and he did stuff with other girls. It's still hard to deal with, regardless of the fact that we were broken up. It makes me feel so disgusted and upset and jelous. time to move on from these emotions right? He's with me now. Link to post Share on other sites
2ndConfusedfemale Posted May 19, 2004 Share Posted May 19, 2004 Well, you need to do something because your behavior could push him into the arms of another woman...If you are being distant, and accusing him of things, nagging, etc. (making the relationship worse instead of better) he COULD get sick of your behavior and break up, and while it's over he'll go to another woman which is exactly what you don't want. You need to buy a journal and write down why you are thinking the way that you are (write what you THINK) and when you are able to identify it you'll be more prepared to get rid of it. In the meantime PLEASE do not be a horrible girlfriend. Link to post Share on other sites
CutiePy Posted May 19, 2004 Share Posted May 19, 2004 I agree with 2ndconfusedfemale You have to keep your jealousy in check or else you will push this guy away. Could you be having these dreams because you're insecure and maybe you think he still thinks about these girls or something. He is with you because he chooses to be but no one wants to be with a nag or someone who can't trust them. Take it easy and things will get better, try being loving and caring, not untrusting and suspicious. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Samantha16 Posted May 20, 2004 Author Share Posted May 20, 2004 No, i don't nag him or anything. Everythings good. It's just unfortunate that these things had to have happened in our relationship. Are there any couples out there that didn't have to go through rough patches? I know every relationship confronts conflict, but I just wish there wasn't anything I had to get over. I wish I didn't have to see or think of these girls and know that he liked them at one point and kissed them and thought of them and not me. When someone tells you for three years that they love you, it's sad to know that at one point or another, then didn't love you, and they were thinking of someone else. It just puts a nautious feeling in my stomache and it makes me jealous. But everything between us is great. I don't put him on a guilt trip. We had a conversation last week about what happened when we broke up. But we were both on the same page and he understands that I was deeply affected by it and I'm scared for what might happen in the future. I don't expect him to say, "I'll never leave you again." because stuff happens, and you can't predict the future. But he's not a scum bag, and we're really good to each other. It's just sad that bad things had to happen in our relationship to put that feeling in the pit of my stomach and put those thoughts in the back of my mind. It feels like the relationship isn't as PURE as it used to be. There's a piece of something that was taken from us. It's one thing to think about ex's that he had (because that's in his past), but it's another to think of the girls he had while broken up with me. (Because that's in OUR past and OUR history together). and it's even harder because we live in a small town, and I see all these girls all the time. Link to post Share on other sites
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