A note to my ex

[perfectlyflawed459]

I am having a really bad today....like I just got done crying because I miss him sooooo freaking much. It usually helps to kind of talk about it, but I don't want to bother any of my friends with it so I just figured I would write a note to him here to kind of get this off my chest

 

Dear C.

 

Wow I can't believe it has only been a month since I have seen or spoken to you, it feels like it has been years. Do you ever think about me, wonder about me, miss me? When I look up at the starry sky and full moon, are you looking at them too? Because not a day goes by where you don't enter my head, where I don't wonder about you, and not a second goes by where I don't miss you and all the wonderful moments we have shared together. How is your life? Are you happy? Does she really make you happy? Have you noticed I am gone? Am I nothing but a memory to you? Or in between those smiles do you ache just like I do. There is so much I wish I could say and do with you. I wish I could hug you, smile with you, laugh with you, BE with you. I wish I could be your kowalawala bear again, listen to classical music like we use to, go on our Sunday walks with your goofy dogs Sarge and Lucy. I wish I could cheer you on loudly instead of doing it from the shadows. I wish I could express to you how proud I am of you, despite our downfalls. I wish I could find the words to tell you that truly reflect how much you really mean to me and how much I love you. I wish you would realize that she, or any other girl, will NEVER be able to give you the same love I have for you, and that you would finally appreciate the sacrifices I have made for you. If only you knew how hard it was to say goodbye to you on that night a month ago. Doing the right thing has never hurt so much, and I know the right thing to do is to let you go, even if it hurts me. I will always love you, even through the bad, forever and always. If you ever decide to find your way home, my heart will still be open.

 

Ugh here come the waterworks...But I do feel better. I am so grateful for this website, it truly has helped me a lot. If anyone wants to post their own note feel free to do so

[IfiKnewThen]

hi : )

 

sorry youre grieving. it sounds like you broke it off with him. is this correct? if so it might be why you havent heard from him.

 

its hard for a dumpee to know what to do and say to the person that ended it with them.

 

if you think you made a mistake or realize you really love this person you left, it may not be too late to tell them that.

 

if you thought it was best and just miss them or feel bad about breaking it off..

i am sure they still think of you. why did you break it off? the reason might be beyond valid , i get that : )

 

you can hurt as the dumper. but you kinda sound like you want to go back with them or want them to come back after you? i am a bit confused .

 

it is late maybe i just misread this. it good to vent. this is a letter for him. you didnt ask for advise , so please forgive me here. there is an awesome thread where people write things ..they feel they cant tell their exes. its in the coping section called something like write here instead of contacting your ex. take care and God speed your healing.

[perfectlyflawed459]

hi : )

 

sorry youre grieving. it sounds like you broke it off with him. is this correct? if so it might be why you havent heard from him.

 

its hard for a dumpee to know what to do and say to the person that ended it with them.

 

if you think you made a mistake or realize you really love this person you left, it may not be too late to tell them that.

 

if you thought it was best and just miss them or feel bad about breaking it off..

i am sure they still think of you. why did you break it off? the reason might be beyond valid , i get that : )

 

you can hurt as the dumper. but you kinda sound like you want to go back with them or want them to come back after you? i am a bit confused .

 

it is late maybe i just misread this. it good to vent. this is a letter for him. you didnt ask for advise , so please forgive me here. there is an awesome thread where people write things ..they feel they cant tell their exes. its in the coping section called something like write here instead of contacting your ex. take care and God speed your healing.

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t301193/

 

That is my story if you are interested...He dumped me back in December and things have been up and down since. We have a very complicated situation and things such as timing, age difference, college, etc. are pretty much what tore us apart. Sometimes I don't know if it is worth fighting for anymore because it hurts too much at times, but yet he means the world to me and I haven't met a guy that could even potentially top him. I have tried though, so in the meantime I have given up on dating, am letting him go, forgiving him, and am trying to focus on bettering myself and making something of my life. I have been able to be happy and accomplish things, but that doesn't take away the fact that there is still an empty hole there where he use to be. I miss him so much, but I know separation is best for both of us right now.

[IfiKnewThen]

i read your story. this is tough b/c you will be going to 2 separate schools. when we are young we date, to find out who is best for us and to get familiar with life in general.

 

you 2 are young. him in particular. there is such thing as childhood sweet hearts, who meet and fall in love marry and stay together. however, there is such a things as GIGS syndrome. please look it up here on love shack, in the search, for the definition and explanation. i think he has GIGS.

 

the best bet is to go to college...sighs...let him date. and if you get together again and can forgive and understand fine. but of course i would NOT have intimate contact with him, aka sex. people young and experimenting are vulnerable to STD that can be deadly. aka aids. so please dont take a chance. i know youre broken up now...but if ever you reunite and have a moment........stop. before you do a thing...think twice. have him checked out. aka tested with papers to prove things and all. get into your studies. you sound VERY smart. build yourself up more and leave your mind and heart open to a mature relationship. but still dont trust any guy and make certain you are safe. life is precious. dont be careless. sorry if i sound like a mom. i am a mom . BUT, this is common sense for anyone in this world of dating. at any age. you dont know who they have been with and who was with the ones they were with. i am sure you get my drift.

 

yopu have to protect your heart and well as you body. you seem to fully understand this is for the best. the empty hole will be replaced someday. i promise you. please trust that. maybe there will be room for friendsip with him, which does strengthen relationships too. just give it time. get into school stuff and make new friends and keep going. youre doing great. trust yourself.

[perfectlyflawed459]

i read your story. this is tough b/c you will be going to 2 separate schools. when we are young we date, to find out who is best for us and to get familiar with life in general.

 

you 2 are young. him in particular. there is such thing as childhood sweet hearts, who meet and fall in love marry and stay together. however, there is such a things as GIGS syndrome. please look it up here on love shack, in the search, for the definition and explanation. i think he has GIGS.

 

the best bet is to go to college...sighs...let him date. and if you get together again and can forgive and understand fine. but of course i would NOT have intimate contact with him, aka sex. people young and experimenting are vulnerable to STD that can be deadly. aka aids. so please dont take a chance. i know youre broken up now...but if ever you reunite and have a moment........stop. before you do a thing...think twice. have him checked out. aka tested with papers to prove things and all. get into your studies. you sound VERY smart. build yourself up more and leave your mind and heart open to a mature relationship. but still dont trust any guy and make certain you are safe. life is precious. dont be careless. sorry if i sound like a mom. i am a mom . BUT, this is common sense for anyone in this world of dating. at any age. you dont know who they have been with and who was with the ones they were with. i am sure you get my drift.

 

yopu have to protect your heart and well as you body. you seem to fully understand this is for the best. the empty hole will be replaced someday. i promise you. please trust that. maybe there will be room for friendsip with him, which does strengthen relationships too. just give it time. get into school stuff and make new friends and keep going. youre doing great. trust yourself.

 

Thank you so much for the advice It was hard for awhile but I have found it in myself to forgive him for everything that has happened between us, and that has helped me in moving on from all this and letting go. Definitely feel much better than when I was holding a grudge and such. I read somewhere that if you ever wanted to rebuild a relationship, you have to let the old one completely die first. I think this separation will be good for both of us because it will finally allow the past to truly die away and leave all the good memories. I agree, I read about GIGS and I think he has it too...unfortunately I know I have to let him be a boy and love him enough to let him go if I ever want things to be better between us. I know it isn't guarenteed that we will be together again, but it will help matters that is for sure. He and I always seem to find our way back to each other, but I realized that right now the timing is waaaaay off between us. So I am livin' my life, making myself happy, and making something amazing out of my life. I appreciate everything going right and always find a reason to smile I will keep your advice in mind if we ever cross paths again, because you are right about the whole experiementing thing and such. I will continue to push on and trust myself in this decision, it can only get better from here with or without him

[reimeivn]

please dont send the thing to your ex. me i know that once i dont care about somebody i just dont care i wouldnt even read the thing. if he wants to know how you feel or anything he would have asked.

[perfectlyflawed459]

please dont send the thing to your ex. me i know that once i dont care about somebody i just dont care i wouldnt even read the thing. if he wants to know how you feel or anything he would have asked.

 

No no don't worry I have no intention of talking to him anytime soon. That was just how I was feeling yesterday and it helps to write how I feel because I don't wanna tell people that I am regressing when everyone is getting the idea that I am happy again. Which I am happy with my life quite honestly, I have been improving myself and such, but I still miss him with every ounce of my being. It will be okay though, I am remaining positive and moving forward:)

[IfiKnewThen]

i am really proud of you. youre doing great. you have a good head on your shoulders

 

and i like what you said here, because i read this too in johns grays book, mars and venus starting over:

 

quote perfectlyflawed459: I read somewhere that if you ever wanted to rebuild a relationship, you have to let the old one completely die first.

 

 

this is so true. in the book i read where they say this...he always adds seeing loving things in the past relationship and forgiving ultimately. this takes time. first you have to go through all the stages of the healing process. which do include grief, sometimes anger, then you get to the acceptance part. but it will be MUCH better to let this relationship heal and let go and get rid of any left over feelings before entering into a healthy relationship.

 

so kudos to you : ) God bless.

[IfiKnewThen]

oh also. yes to REBUILD a relationship, you have to let go of the old one. yes. youi have to forgive, forget and really REBUILD.

 

you rock. you are so smart. knowledge is power : )

[perfectlyflawed459]

i am really proud of you. youre doing great. you have a good head on your shoulders

 

and i like what you said here, because i read this too in johns grays book, mars and venus starting over:

 

quote perfectlyflawed459: I read somewhere that if you ever wanted to rebuild a relationship, you have to let the old one completely die first.

 

 

this is so true. in the book i read where they say this...he always adds seeing loving things in the past relationship and forgiving ultimately. this takes time. first you have to go through all the stages of the healing process. which do include grief, sometimes anger, then you get to the acceptance part. but it will be MUCH better to let this relationship heal and let go and get rid of any left over feelings before entering into a healthy relationship.

 

so kudos to you : ) God bless.

 

Thank you When times get a little rough, I always remind myself of this and the fact that you may lose someone now, but that doesn't mean they are gone forever. It helps me keep my chin up and move forward towards the future and has helped me in letting go. I know it will take a lot of time before things fade away, but it will be okay and I am remaining positive.

[perfectlyflawed459]

i

quote perfectlyflawed459: I read somewhere that if you ever wanted to rebuild a relationship, you have to let the old one completely die first.

 

 

QUOTE]

 

love that, hope it will ring true for me

 

I am glad you like it and that it can help you out. It isn't a bad thing to have a little hope So long as your main focus is yourself and allowing yourself to move forward and let go. You may lose someone right now, but that doesn't mean you lose them forever.