Tiberius Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 and still expect it to work anyway? If I do everything requierd to advance my career I have a reasonably high probability of success. If I work really hard, but am not on time and rude at the workplace, my chances are lessend. Now in marriage many women will say, no I wont submit to my husband, because it goes against my feminist believes. There it begins that people put something else above marriage. There are probably many other aspects of marriage that people decide to ignore? How can you say you want to be married, when you look at marriage and say, no I wont do that part, I dont like this, scratch the submit part, Iam a feminist. Isnt it unrealistic to expect a marriage to work, if you think you can trim it any way it suits your caprice and put other values, feminist values for example above marriage? If you dont want marriage isnt it better to just shack up? Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 What makes you think that marriage means a woman shoud submit to her husband? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tiberius Posted November 6, 2011 Author Share Posted November 6, 2011 (edited) What makes you think that marriage means a woman shoud submit to her husband? Read the bible. Its right there. Along with the faithfull part. You do think a husband should be faithfull, right? If neither party isnt the probability of a lasting marriage is drastically reduced. Why do you think its any different with everything else? Edited November 6, 2011 by Tiberius Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 Is that your only argument for why a woman should submit to her husband? As for "everything else" - I refer to the submission because that is what you said in your OP. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tiberius Posted November 6, 2011 Author Share Posted November 6, 2011 (edited) Is that your only argument for why a woman should submit to her husband? As for "everything else" - I refer to the submission because that is what you said in your OP. My point is if you want a marriage to work do marriage. The divorce rate is high. How long do you think you can keep a job if you choose to not do everything requierd to keep the job? If you dont want to submit be faithfull or cherish, why get married? You can just cohabit instead. Edited November 6, 2011 by Tiberius Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 My point is if you want a marriage to work do marriage. The divorce rate is high. How long do you think you can keep a job if you choose to not do everything requierd to keep the job? If you dont want to submit be faithfull or cherish, why get married? You can just cohabit instead. You can be faithful and cherish without having to submit to your husband. Why do you think a husband and wife should not be equal partners? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tiberius Posted November 6, 2011 Author Share Posted November 6, 2011 You can be faithful and cherish without having to submit to your husband. Why do you think a husband and wife should not be equal partners? Because its part of marriage that a wife submits to a husband. I dont think you can pick something apart and still expect it to work. My point is if you dont want to be married pursue other options, cohabitation friends with benifits etc.. You can be a feminist and still love and cherish, but thats not marriage and thats why the divorce rate is so high. You should cohabit then. Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 In your view then the only valid marriage is one that follows your interpretation of the Bible. So anybody who is not a practising Chistian is not married in your view? Am I understanding you correctly? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 OP, I honestly don't know your history; I do know it's generally problematical to have a relationship with another person who has markedly different belief systems and relationship style than one's own. The 'feminist' who believes it is unhealthy to 'submit' to a spouse has their own style in the area of relationships. If it doesn't match up, then that. I was socialized into and continue to believe that both spouses should 'submit' to each other, placing the other spouse's needs and wants at a level equal to one's own in an environment of mutual and proactive generosity of spirit and deed. If/when I'm with someone I love, I do my part; if they match up, great. If not, done. There's no natural law which says we must sacrifice ourselves at the altar of another. This is why I believe a healthy marriage is conditional love and commitment. That belief came at high cost and through much pain. TBH, I wouldn't consider cohabiting with someone, or even being in a relationship with someone whose style of love, 'submission' and commitment didn't match up in a healthy way. Why bother? I'd rather be alone. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tiberius Posted November 6, 2011 Author Share Posted November 6, 2011 (edited) In your view then the only valid marriage is one that follows your interpretation of the Bible. So anybody who is not a practising Chistian is not married in your view? Am I understanding you correctly? Of course not everybody marries in a church with a white wedding. They have their own ideas about marriage. If they marry in a mosque they follow moarriage according to the Quran I assume. If they just get a civil marriage they do their own thing since its a legal formality where documents are signed that make the couple husband and wife legally in front of the state. In a legal marriage either party stands to gain at the expense of the other materially. Personally I would not sign those legal papers if I would loose in the matchup, why should I, unless its in addition to a PROPER marriage. But if you are going to be wed by a priest in a christian marriage in front of god whats the point if you say I dont like that part of marriage I wont do this? Edited November 6, 2011 by Tiberius Link to post Share on other sites
stopdropandroll Posted December 25, 2011 Share Posted December 25, 2011 Read the bible. Its right there. Along with the faithfull part. You do think a husband should be faithfull, right? If neither party isnt the probability of a lasting marriage is drastically reduced. Why do you think its any different with everything else? It's sad people discredit the Bible simply based on the fact it's the Bible. God didn't give us guidelines and rules to make us miserable. He gave them to us because it's simply the best and most successful way to live our lives. If we obeyed all the rules God laid out for us our divorce rate would be blasted into oblivion. Sadly we are a rebellious people who don't want to obey God. Tiberius, I completely agree with you on people picking and choosing what parts of marriage they agree with. I believe that if you're not all in then you should be all out. All the feminists have done is work to destroy the sanctity of marriage and undermine the roles of men and women in general (not just in marriage). Flame away. I can take it. Link to post Share on other sites
skywriter Posted December 25, 2011 Share Posted December 25, 2011 (edited) It's sad people discredit the Bible simply based on the fact it's the Bible. God didn't give us guidelines and rules to make us miserable. He gave them to us because it's simply the best and most successful way to live our lives. If we obeyed all the rules God laid out for us our divorce rate would be blasted into oblivion. Sadly we are a rebellious people who don't want to obey God. Tiberius, I completely agree with you on people picking and choosing what parts of marriage they agree with. I believe that if you're not all in then you should be all out. All the feminists have done is work to destroy the sanctity of marriage and undermine the roles of men and women in general (not just in marriage). Flame away. I can take it. I'm more inclined to agree with the perception and interpretations of the Bible being misinterpreted to suit that specific readers needs. I think Carhill explains that well in his post. "Both" spouses submitting to one another and having equal respect for one another. Not one submitting "over" another. I also consider the times we are living in and how men & women are less inclined to marry, yet have children together. Whomever is left with the responsibilties of the children have to step up. You have to do what is necessary in these times, so being submissive may be the last worry on someones mind. If you are being a team, consisting of mutual respect, etc. then what have you got? Edited December 25, 2011 by skywriter Link to post Share on other sites
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