AlexisMacabre Posted November 7, 2011 Share Posted November 7, 2011 my ex which is still my husband only were separated has always been my best friends even all the other times we've separated we would talk about all these things. i very much miss being his friend and not only that but being his wife but id rather much be friends then not be friends at all i mean this guy knows everything about me inside and out. hes my best friends, we've been on NC for about 2 weeks now and im doing fine but i wanna initiate being friends at least for the sake of our son. i dont wanna be this bitter ex wife someday i wanna be ok to hang out with him and our son somedays and just catch up. but i dont know how to initiate this. im scared he will reject me. should i do it or not? what are your opinions, right now im not hurting anymore just kinda want my friend back even if there will be nothing more and im fine with it. Link to post Share on other sites
Phateless Posted November 7, 2011 Share Posted November 7, 2011 my ex which is still my husband only were separated has always been my best friends even all the other times we've separated we would talk about all these things. i very much miss being his friend and not only that but being his wife but id rather much be friends then not be friends at all i mean this guy knows everything about me inside and out. hes my best friends, we've been on NC for about 2 weeks now and im doing fine but i wanna initiate being friends at least for the sake of our son. i dont wanna be this bitter ex wife someday i wanna be ok to hang out with him and our son somedays and just catch up. but i dont know how to initiate this. im scared he will reject me. should i do it or not? what are your opinions, right now im not hurting anymore just kinda want my friend back even if there will be nothing more and im fine with it. It's been two weeks. Waaaay too soon. Give him at least a few months to get over you. If you care about him, give him space. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AlexisMacabre Posted November 7, 2011 Author Share Posted November 7, 2011 thank you for the feed back, he seems completely over me tho. i guess your right as he had told one of his friends he was "ecstatic" that our relationship was over. thank you, i need to take advice before doing something i may regret. im glad you responded i might have done it right away. Link to post Share on other sites
IfiKnewThen Posted November 7, 2011 Share Posted November 7, 2011 i think it would be healthy for you and your son if you could be friends. you need to heal first. but i dont necessarily think n/c is the way to go here. dont know the back story on this one...but i would say minimal contact when neccessary Link to post Share on other sites
HeavenOrHell Posted November 7, 2011 Share Posted November 7, 2011 Did you only split up 2 weeks ago? If so, I would give it longer before seeing if you can be friends. I only needed about a month NC (we were together 18 years) before being friends, but this was 7 months after we split, I wanted him back for 7 months, so friendship just kept me hanging on, then finally going NC for about 4 weeks after that was all I needed. We are close friends still, (split July '09). I don't know what your circumstances are, but if neither of you want to reconcile then maybe you could be friends soon, but if either of you (from what you've said, he doesn't) have even the tiniest hope of reconciliation then leave it longer. Always such a shame if 2 people who still get on so well can't be friends. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AlexisMacabre Posted November 7, 2011 Author Share Posted November 7, 2011 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t304083/ the link above is the thread with the background info on the relationship. we split up almost a month ago but we were still contacting eachother for about 2 weeks but we were mostly fighting and he was saying very hurtful things to me so i initiated NC because i couldnt stand the way he was treating me when we did talk. i seem to kinda agree now that staying NC could be good for right now because im sure he doesnt really wanna speak to me. so im sticking to NC for now, last night i was just thinking if we could maybe possibly be friends but i wasnt sure and i didnt wanna contact him and get shot down so im very happy i asked for some advice here, it made me get my head on straight. im pretty sure down the line maybe we can be friends but for right now i agree its not a very good idea. Link to post Share on other sites
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