An argument for race and status for dating - white women will NEVER date asian men

[Emilia]

I dated an Asian guy recently (I'm caucasian, European) and I know he thought it was because I was more open minded than most European women, maybe he was right. I used to live in Asia albeit only for a short time. I lived in Africa too but I would never date an African, just lack of attraction more than anything.

 

I found the culture gap was too wide, I think the majority of caucasian men are seen as more masculine and I found that to be true in this case too. He was a bit of a mommy's boy, was talking marriage and kids from day one and ironically he wasn't that open to understanding Western culture even though he had friends here and had very Western sports hobbies. He was also sexually quite inexperienced which turned out to be the deal breaker for me because he was basically clueless.

 

If he had been a British Asian (ie born in the UK) with a more worldly approach to life, I probably would have stayed with him because I found him physically attractive. I found it ironic that he had a more sheltered upbringing than I did.

[counterman]

Most of my Asian friends have no experience dating and are generally passive. Some of my Asian girl friends prefer white guys and are really oppose to Asian guys, for some reason. And it does seem that Asian guys do have it tougher. In saying that, one of my friends who does really well with girls is Asian and what separates him from other men is that he is extremely confident and has a certain charm.

 

I don't see many Asian men with white women... but I think race shouldn't be an issue. If a women does not want to date you because of your race, then it'll just be like if she doesn't want to date you for any other reason; all you do afterwards is move on. Race shouldn't be used an an excuse. I guarantee that if you were the best that you could be, you'll have no trouble. But sometimes its just easy to blame other things. The hardest bit is not only putting in effort, but doing so consistently, especially when you run into a rough patch. If you've asked out 1 million white women and all have rejected you, then you can complain.

[musemaj11]

I dated an Asian guy recently (I'm caucasian, European) and I know he thought it was because I was more open minded than most European women, maybe he was right. I used to live in Asia albeit only for a short time. I lived in Africa too but I would never date an African, just lack of attraction more than anything.

 

I found the culture gap was too wide, I think the majority of caucasian men are seen as more masculine and I found that to be true in this case too. He was a bit of a mommy's boy, was talking marriage and kids from day one and ironically he wasn't that open to understanding Western culture even though he had friends here and had very Western sports hobbies. He was also sexually quite inexperienced which turned out to be the deal breaker for me because he was basically clueless.

By Asian do you mean Indian subcontinent or Chinese, Korean, Japanese, etc?

 

As far as I know Americans and Europeans have different understanding of who constitute as 'Asians'.

 

I found it ironic that he had a more sheltered upbringing than I did.

How so? Did you expect that everyone outside Europe live in a hut?

[Emilia]

By Asian do you mean Indian subcontinent or Chinese, Korean, Japanese, etc?

 

As far as I know Americans and Europeans have different understanding of who constitute as 'Asians'.

 

 

I referred to an Indian.

 

 

How so? Did you expect that everyone outside Europe live in a hut?

 

Maybe you missed my comment about my living in Asia and Africa for a while ... Perhaps you want to read it again

[musemaj11]

I referred to an Indian.

Thats what I thought when I saw you were from the UK.

 

If the OP is an American, the Asians he is talking about are the yellow kind, not the brown kind to put it racistly.

[Emilia]

Thats what I thought when I saw you were from the UK.

 

If the OP is an American, the Asians he is talking about are the yellow kind, not the brown kind to put it racistly.

 

You can't be this thick. The thread is about the perceived social status of non-white races.

[musemaj11]

You can't be this thick. The thread is about the perceived social status of non-white races.

The unattractiveness of non-whites have little to do with social status. It all has to do with the fact that non-whites tend to be less attractive in terms of body size and bone structure (nasal, cheek, etc). Its not really about skin color.

[jobaba]

The unattractiveness of non-whites have little to do with social status. It all has to do with the fact that non-whites tend to be less attractive in terms of body size and bone structure (nasal, cheek, etc). Its not really about skin color.

 

Yo. That's just your opinion man.

 

I prefer Asian women to white women when it comes to pure looks.

[Mrlonelyone]

I don't know about non-whites being less attractive in any objective sense.

 

The standards of beauty in the USA and UK are set by the majority which is white.

 

Besides when an Emprical study is undertaken why mixed race people are found to be prettiest of all.

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1265949/Mixed-race-people-attractive-finds-British-study.html

 

The British regard people of mixed race as the most attractive and successful, say psychologists.

Celebrities such as formula one champion Lewis Hamilton, footballer Ryan Giggs and X Factor star Leona Lewis have helped boost the image of mixed race people, according to a new study.

Psychological testing found they outstrip people who are white or black in terms of perceived attractiveness, with a rating that far exceeds their representation in British society.

[stillafool]

He is bitter because he wants to date white girls and he's not getting as much play as he thinks he should.

 

Yes why does OP only want to date white girls? WTF?

[Mrlonelyone]

Well statistically speaking... most of the women one will chance into are white. If you rule them out then that's 75% of the women in the USA off limits.

[Spices]

It's not that Asian guys can't get girls, it's more that they lack confidence & game.

 

Just look at the youtube star TimothyDeLaGhetto2. He's Asian & he get's a lot of beautiful woman because he has game (have you seen his ex?!). He even openly admits that he has a small penis & he still get's woman. He has a lot of confidence & a great personality.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Seriously, learn a few lessons from him.

Edited November 9, 2011 by Spices

[RiverRunning]

I'm a white woman - and I totally have a thing for Asian men. When I'm out with friends and they see an Asian guy, they'll nudge me and give a nod so I pay attention.

 

But I was surprised to hear that on many dating sites like OKCupid, apparently Asian men are at the bottom of the barrel.

 

I have been doing this all wrong only dating white men. Time to go give some lovin' to those poor neglected Asian guys!

 

Edit: But I am in a relationship, albeit a struggling one. But still - what kind of sane single woman would pass up an Asian man?

Edited November 9, 2011 by RiverRunning

[USMCHokie]

But still - what kind of sane single woman would pass up an Asian man?

 

Eh, more than you would think. But I feel it's much more prevalent in the online dating world than it is in real life. To women, it's just another stat to filter men out, just like height or body type. I honestly don't think it's anything personal..just a tool to make selection easier.

[fishtaco]

Eh, more than you would think. But I feel it's much more prevalent in the online dating world than it is in real life. To women, it's just another stat to filter men out, just like height or body type. I honestly don't think it's anything personal..just a tool to make selection easier.

 

Yup. That's why Asian men should not use online dating.

 

I run into women that don't want to date me because I'm Asian all the time. But then again, I also run into women that don't want to date me for other reasons all the time too. So I don't see why ethnicity is any more or less valid reason to not date a person than "there's no spark". It is what it is. Men are generally running at 10-20% success ratio. Ethnicity, although it could be a factor, is buried in there some place amongst myriad of other tangible and intangible reasons.

 

I'm not offended if the woman I'm hitting on isn't interested, and in fact, I don't even care why she's not interested. I just need to know she's not. Then I'll save both of us time and effort and go hit on someone else.

 

The world is a big place with all kind of different people. There are always options.

[Sanman]

Yup. That's why Asian men should not use online dating.

 

I run into women that don't want to date me because I'm Asian all the time. But then again, I also run into women that don't want to date me for other reasons all the time too. So I don't see why ethnicity is any more or less valid reason to not date a person than "there's no spark". It is what it is. Men are generally running at 10-20% success ratio. Ethnicity, although it could be a factor, is buried in there some place amongst myriad of other tangible and intangible reasons.

 

I'm not offended if the woman I'm hitting on isn't interested, and in fact, I don't even care why she's not interested. I just need to know she's not. Then I'll save both of us time and effort and go hit on someone else.

 

The world is a big place with all kind of different people. There are always options.

 

Great attitude. It has always worked for me. It is just like getting a job. No one cares how many you didn't get, just that you get one.

[jobaba]

Great attitude. It has always worked for me. It is just like getting a job. No one cares how many you didn't get, just that you get one.

 

Well, yeah. Unless you really get to know and like one. Then it hurts.

 

Then again, I have friends who are so calm and never get frazzled when it comes to women and relationships. I should learn to be more like that.

[USMCHokie]

Then again, I have friends who are so calm and never get frazzled when it comes to women and relationships. I should learn to be more like that.

 

Because they understand that women and relationships have absolutely no bearing on their value as a person. If a girl isn't interested in them, it doesn't change a damn thing about them. All they say is,"I'm still awesome, and thanks for playing. Now what's for dinner?"

 

I'm working on this myself...

[Sanman]

Well, yeah. Unless you really get to know and like one. Then it hurts.

 

Then again, I have friends who are so calm and never get frazzled when it comes to women and relationships. I should learn to be more like that.

 

 

Sure, just like it sucks to lose a job that you like and have had for a while. However, that does not mean you stop working forever. You take the time to heal, dust yourself off, and find the next job.

[musemaj11]

I don't know about non-whites being less attractive in any objective sense.

 

The standards of beauty in the USA and UK are set by the majority which is white.

Everywhere in the world, European look is considered the standard of beauty.

 

Besides when an Emprical study is undertaken why mixed race people are found to be prettiest of all.

Yeah, mixed race people who are HALF-WHITE!

[oaks]

Yeah, mixed race people who are HALF-WHITE!

 

um. Nope. Think a little more broadly.

[RiverRunning]

All of this still shocks me - of course, considering how into it I am, I guess I would find it puzzling that others would rule that out.

 

I think too many women have strict standards about who they will or won't date. I couldn't imagine ruling out a guy because he's too short, too fat, too thin, etc. My partner is 2 - 3 inches shorter than I am. It has never bothered me. But for the first few months I slouched because I was terrified that it would bother him. It's not even an issue. Sometimes we joke about it, but his masculinity isn't impeded on because I'm tall and I don't feel less feminine because he's shorter than I am.

 

Same with an Asian guy. It is very sad to see they get dumped on on dating sites. I would say in that case an Asian guy's best bet probably is to take it offline and do it old school. Get to know girls at work, by volunteering, at school, etc. You're just going to have to be bold, go up to her, introduce yourself, etc.

 

But in any case, I hope this gives the Asian guys (and girls, although they probably have much more success among white men) out there hope that there are still girls out there that find you totally and irresistably hot. Keep looking and keep your chin up. There is -someone- out there for you.