Abuse or not?

[lyeex]

I had been seeing a guy for about a year and a half. We started out as casual, not wanting anything serious for the first few months. Earlier this year I let him know that I had feelings for him and wanted a relationship or this causal thing had to end. He told me he wanted a relationship with me as well, but to take it slow. From that point on he continually led me on, started talking/seeing/sleeping with other women. I ended it with him countless times only for him to come back.

 

He had a way of making me feel good, like he cared about me, but he also was very cold and distant at times. Some days he'd spend all day texting me, then there would be days and days that I wouldnt even hear from him. It was one big rollercoaster ride, and I'm not sure why I put up with it for as long as I did. He wanted me to be around but he also didnt want to stop looking for other women. I guess I wasn't the one for him.

 

One night, we had been drinking and got into an argument. I started to hit him, which I know I shouldn't have, but I was just tired of him playing games with me. He responded by punching me in the nose, breaking it. We havent spoken since (5 weeks ago) except for him texting me a few times and calling me once, saying we need to talk, but I chose to ignore it. Havent heard from him in over a week.

 

Is this a form of abuse? He obviously knew that I wanted more with him, but he kept me around for his own selfish needs, giving me false hope, saying it was "going somewhere". I knew deep down he was playing me, and I allowed it to get to this point.

 

I know people say that when it becomes physical, it will get worse if you stay in the relationship. But I started it. He had never hurt me in any way other than emotionally over the past year, never raised his hand or anything. I feel like it was my fault that he punched me. We were both drunk, not thinking clearly, and he responded to a woman repeatedly hitting him in the face. I dont however think it is okay that he responded in this way, or think it's okay that I hit him. He's a lot bigger than I am, and could've restrained me or anything else before having to hit me. I just dont know what to think of this.

[betterdeal]

You both physically abused each other. It sounds like a toxic relationship and, whatever his motives, you guys are not good for each other. Lose contact with him and move on in your life.