Why Does my girlfriend look at other guys in front of me?

[JohnnyPiers]

So it all started when we first dated when I went to pick her up at her job ( convenient store ) and a guy said hi to the other girl and she said "Hey what about me!" and the guy said hey beautiful and she smiled.I wasn't that mad but next time I picked her up I saw her look at a guy and get all goggley eyed and looked at him a few times...Than it started by us going out and her checking out other dudes in mall or in restaurants.One day I had it and said "why do you check out other guys in front of me?" and after a arguement she said "So! You look at other woman too!" and I knew I wasnt crazy..We went to an ice cream parlor and everytime this guy went by the cash register she looked over to him ( about 10-15 times ) and eventually I said What are you looking at? Now last week she did it again at her job....She glanced over to this guy around our age about 6 times...Listen I know I am jealous and i've told her numerous times not to do it but she continues to do it over and over.I love the girl and she says she loves me..she doesnt say "oh this guys hot or that guy is hot w/e" But I feel she has a hidden agenda and is a down low Hoe...Probably even cheated on me..But when she looks it makes me feel like ****..like she doesnt respect me at all..Theres going to come a point where I break up with her over it..At this point I won't even marry the girl because of this **** and it bothers me

 

Look ladies and gentlemen,I am a decent looking man and when I am out with my girlfriend I don't have a care in the world for other woman she gives me the utmost confidence but I guess she doesnt Share the same Feeling..her last boyfriend was HIDEOUS and I really mean it and she says she has low self esteem and she thought no one wanted her..What she has done before me is her business fine but now it is running in our relationship..

 

Ive confronted her numerous times..And Im naturally angry at her for it now..should I just break up with her? She doesnt seem to care for my feelings

 

Also its not like she looks at a guy once and I get mad but 5+ times everytime..

 

when I try to talk to her about anything in this topic,She gets VERY VERY defensive and shuts me out. She is not open to me like that at all and I wish she was because it definitely leaves a huge Hole in our relationship..I would feel better maybe if she could discuss it with me but maybe she feels guilty or something I really Don't know.I just want a real discussion with her and she refuses to ever talk about anything like that.It makes her upset that I think she does it but her not being able to talk about it makes me not want to marry her. 42 minutes ago

When are not dating...We are in a serious relationship for 2 and a half years...So I guess if she is looking at other men than we have to breakupp..I dont see any other choice

Edited November 11, 2011 by JohnnyPiers

[seibert253]

First off, checking out other dudes in front of you is very disrespectful IMO. It is also disrespectful of her, if you check out other chicks when you are with her.

 

Another thing that jumps out, is you seem very jealous and insecure about this.

 

In any regards, you say you've addressed your concerns about how she acts, but she continues to do so. Here's a test/way to get your point across:

Next time she's checking out a dude in front of you, here's what you do. Calmly tell her how her checking out that guy is disrespectful and hurts your feelings. Then tell her it appears she would rather be with him than you, and tell her she can have him. Then get up and leave. If she doesn't come chasing after you, then keep on stepping. She can find her own ride home. Don't answer her calls/texts for at least 24hrs. Let her sweat.

If she does chase you down, then have a heart to heart on how this is disrespectful, and you will not be with someone who continues to disrespect you.

 

You've been the nice guy long enough. It's time to put your foot down and stand up for yourself.

 

Peace,

[lostcharm]

She sounds very hungry for attention.

 

Y'all need to work on your communication skills. If she's not willing to talk about this without throwing a hissy fit or try to understand your point of view, maybe she just isn't ready to be in a relationship.

[Negative Nancy]

now you know how us women constantly feel.

[JohnnyPiers]

now you know how us women constantly feel.

 

And hows that? Bored and want to have sex with every guy?

[seibert253]

now you know how us women constantly feel.

 

No, she means that when guys are with their girls, and are checking out other girls. Disrespectful to your girl. Goes both ways.

[Citizen Erased]

But I feel she has a hidden agenda and is a down low Hoe...Probably even cheated on me..

 

You aren't in love with her, or you wouldn't think anything even remotely close to this statement.

[JohnnyPiers]

No, she means that when guys are with their girls, and are checking out other girls. Disrespectful to your girl. Goes both ways.

 

When I am out with my girlfriend I don't look at other girls because I am confident I have a georgious woman by my side..I have high self esteem when I am with her and Im only interested in her..Sadly she doesn't feel the same and she will check out any guy that comes our way...

 

Granted we all check out other men and woman,but to do it in front of your boyfriend/girlfriend is disrespectful

[JohnnyPiers]

You aren't in love with her, or you wouldn't think anything even remotely close to this statement.

 

 

Meh We are both young...Her being only 21 and me 24...Who knows what love is anyway? We have to be sure it is love..I think I am in love with her because she makes me smile and makes me feel warm on the inside and when im not with her nd think of her I snicker and get the fuzzy laugh..But when we don't talk about the things we really need to it makes me think why doesnt she want to talk about this or why won't she be open with me about certain stuff? Out foundation or any relationship foundation is based on simple mutual understandings and without it a relationship will surely fall

[betterdeal]

Ive confronted her numerous times..And Im naturally angry at her for it now..should I just break up with her? She doesnt seem to care for my feelings

 

Might be worth making it clear to her that you find this unacceptable and if it continues you will call it off. If you can maintain composure whilst you do so, so much the better, otherwise she may take to be "just another argument". And then follow through with the consequences you warned about if needs be.

[loversquarrel]

Sounds like you got yourself an attention whore. You don't need to be with someone who is going to make you feel insecure, its not worth it. She's trouble, do yourself a favor and walk away - she's not that into you to be disrespectful this early on.

[wezol]

Meh We are both young...Her being only 21 and me 24...Who knows what love is anyway? We have to be sure it is love..I think I am in love with her because she makes me smile and makes me feel warm on the inside and when im not with her nd think of her I snicker and get the fuzzy laugh..But when we don't talk about the things we really need to it makes me think why doesnt she want to talk about this or why won't she be open with me about certain stuff? Out foundation or any relationship foundation is based on simple mutual understandings and without it a relationship will surely fall

 

Maybe one day you'll grow up and actually begin acting like the adult you are.

[Citizen Erased]

Meh We are both young...Her being only 21 and me 24...Who knows what love is anyway? We have to be sure it is love..I think I am in love with her because she makes me smile and makes me feel warm on the inside and when im not with her nd think of her I snicker and get the fuzzy laugh..But when we don't talk about the things we really need to it makes me think why doesnt she want to talk about this or why won't she be open with me about certain stuff? Out foundation or any relationship foundation is based on simple mutual understandings and without it a relationship will surely fall

I'm 24 and happily married and in love. You're not 18 anymore, you're an adult. Time to grow up a little. Relationships require not just mutual understanding but trust and respect. You have neither of those with this girl.

[nofool4u]

Why Does my girlfriend look at other guys in front of me?

 

Because she is selfish and inconsiderate.