YaOldBuckaroo Posted November 13, 2011 Posted November 13, 2011 Hey Sugarkane, There's really no telling whether or not you'll get cheated on again in the future. One way to overcome this kind of paranoia is to just go out there in meet new girls. Don't invest too much emotion if you're scared to get hurt. If you do, learn from it, and move on to another girl. Also, you might find this article helpful: http://www.mikelee.org/dealing-with-paranoia.html Max
ksmit Posted November 13, 2011 Posted November 13, 2011 This has always been my biggest concern Sugarkane. All you can do is try to be more trusting.
TheJiltedGeneration Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 (edited) heya sugarkane its been awhile since we last chat... anyho I can totally relate to this feeling, as after what seems like succession of messy break ups, and strings attached I am starting to pull the reigns back alittle when it comes to falling for people.. paranoid especially is hard to break out of as the relativity to how many times your trust has been broken seems to solidify this feeling of paranoia and fear that your future relationships will follow suit as well..... for me.. we'll I guess you have to take your feelings for what they are ( as I've started to do).. it's going to be hard to break out of this spell ( believe it really has a grip on me) so rather than being devout to being "paranoid" maybe go a few steps down and just show caution in others you might be attracted to... (I've started to see a pattern to why I get hurt by certain types of women all the time, and thats because I seem to go for the quiet self-contained types,.. so maybe reflect on any cues to why those relationships wouldn't have worked even from the beginning... if that makes sense..) I've learned to pick up a few red flags in people now, and try to not meander on my feelings for a person when the evidence is stark and clear as a azure sky that they will as you say "screw you over".. so basically my advice is to ground your feelings and try to pick up cues that a person is genuine or not.. even though its harder than it sounds.. not all people are absolute "ba****rds but alot of them are, and sometimes you have to wade through the ba***rds till you find a person who's definately genuine.. the best think is to not fall head over heels for a person, be fond but not blindly enarmoured.. if your with someone who might be a potential lover, yes give some attention, but dont put your eggs in one basket and devout yourself to them, just reserve some time for them but also enjoy your own company and be self-efficent. this is so that if they do pull the same ****, emotionally your be more ready and able to move on quicker... ( as no offence but as people you could potentially be involved with are also young too, they probably don't know much better than to walk away when problems arise in a relationship so.. don't feel too disheartened if they do.. eventually someone will be mature enough to stick with it.. just people are still learning I guess...) just remember!!!!, if they see your too enarmored with them.. they may potentially see that as exploitable and even become very jaded easily with your valor...... which develops the mindset that they are in control of the relationship.. which leaves some very unpleasant options for them to choose.. Edited November 15, 2011 by TheJiltedGeneration
sunflower11 Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 This might be helpful.. http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/youll-learn-to-trust-again-when-you-learn-to-trust-you/
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