the wizard Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 Generally speaking here, are women naturally inclined to be more cautious with a handsome guy with personality who's good at making women laugh and a bit flirty? What if he smiles alot in conversation and is physically appealing to a woman's eye? Will women tread cautiously with him, make him "work" more so to speak?
Pierre Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 Some women may hold back sex with a good looking guy with personality.
SomewhatExperienced Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 I consider myself fitting the description above and I think I'm experiencing that with a nice girl I'm seeing right now. She's very sweet, gorgeous and interesting. I think there's enough potential between the two of us to justify continuing to date her, but man she's tough to get to know. Although the fact she keeps seeing me, and all the language she uses with texting is allpositive that she likes me, but when I'm with her she doesn't seem to give off ANY solid cues that she's interested. I'm doing all the work, and I'm getting minimal response back. I don't want to be aggressive because she doesn't seem like one to respond well to that, but she's giving me next to nothing to work with. So either she's being cautious, or maybe just really bad at dating.
Author the wizard Posted November 15, 2011 Author Posted November 15, 2011 Some women may hold back sex with a good looking guy with personality. Hmmm. I wonder why. Would love input from women as well. Trying to further understand the female psyche. Do some not feel secure with a handsome boyfriend? Will this cause a guy to be labeled "too handsome" in her eyes?
Author the wizard Posted November 15, 2011 Author Posted November 15, 2011 Also, are women naturally inclined to have sex sooner with a less attractive guy rather than an attractive one due to security reasons?
Pierre Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 Hmmm. I wonder why. Would love input from women as well. Trying to further understand the female psyche. Do some not feel secure with a handsome boyfriend? Will this cause a guy to be labeled "too handsome" in her eyes? As I understand it. If the man is a keeper the female may move very slowly so not to give the impression she is easy.
Author the wizard Posted November 15, 2011 Author Posted November 15, 2011 As I understand it. If the man is a keeper the female may move very slowly so not to give the impression she is easy. Hmm, but she may have slept with other men and let them have sex with her easy? Isn't that manipulation to some extent?
Pierre Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 Hmm, but she may have slept with other men and let them have sex with her easy? Isn't that manipulation to some extent? Some women only sleep with men they want to have a relationship with. Others are less discriminant but, somehow change their ways when they find a good guy. It is rather confusing to men.
Mme. Chaucer Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 There seems to be a glut of "too handsome" men around here lately. Here's my advice: Forget about how you look.
Pierre Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 There seems to be a glut of "too handsome" men around here lately. Here's my advice: Forget about how you look. Good post;). So called attractive people that are conscious of their looks are not attractive.
Mme. Chaucer Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 So called attractive people that are conscious of their looks are not attractive. Really. Just check yourself in the mirror before you go out, give yourself a quick thumbs up if you like what you see, and then carry on with the important parts of life. If you're a girl, you get some free passes throughout the day to powder your nose and reapply fresh lipstick. That's it, though.
Emilia Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 As I understand it. If the man is a keeper the female may move very slowly so not to give the impression she is easy. Not quite. I move (not very) slowly with someone I really like and see as good potential because I don't want to get hurt if we are not compatible
Emilia Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 I would never date nor be nor give attention to a very handsome man. Handsome men are more likely to cheat and have many options. Who wants to deal with that? We all know most men are only as faithful as their options. I do not feel comfortable at all around good looking men and prefer not to associate with them to be honest; they don't make me feel comfortable. Handsome men are very likely to cheat and take you for granted. They know they can get "better" than you and chances are they probably can get better. When they get sick of you (which they will) then they will upgrade you for someone hotter. Good looking men are nothing but trouble. Avoid at all costs. Same for wealthy men; they have too many options and are more likely to cheat. I would not consider either. Why deal with a man that all women want? Do you know how competitive and aggressive women can be around good looking guys? They are not afraid to start taking his clothes off and giving him a bj right on the spot. Good luck keeping a man in demand like that faithful. He won't ever be. You have to learn how to judge character better, that has nothing to do with looks
Pierre Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 (edited) Men are only as faithful as their options. You are very naive. Men who can get more snatch always WILL because it is ingrained in their nature. You never know if your SO is faithful; you may "think" he is being faithful but you may be getting played. If guys could get away with it; most would cheat. Studies have confirmed this. You are just naive. Most "good" and "upstanding" men would cheat if they could get away with it with their dream girl. You are judging from your perspective and people that surround you. Emilia is correct. Edited November 15, 2011 by Pierre
Emilia Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 Men are only as faithful as their options. You are very naive. Men who can get more snatch always WILL because it is ingrained in their nature. You never know if your SO is faithful; you may "think" he is being faithful but you may be getting played. If guys could get away with it; most would cheat. Studies have confirmed this. You are just naive. Most "good" and "upstanding" men would cheat if they could get away with it with their dream girl. What Pierre said. There are plenty of very fine men out there that don't cheat, I'm sorry that you have so little faith in humanity that you don't see that. By the way, not so attractive men can have the opportunity to cheat too, anyone in the whole wide world is able to if they really want to
Mme. Chaucer Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 I would never date nor be nor give attention to a very handsome man. Handsome men are more likely to cheat and have many options. Who wants to deal with that? We all know most men are only as faithful as their options. You are projecting. From your posting history, I understand that you believe your own value comes strictly from how you look and what you have, so you are judging the world by those standards. Yes, you aren't alone in your world view, but it certainly is nowhere near universal. Many people can deal with being blessed with an attractive appearance or the ability to earn big bucks with inherent grace. Many people deal with attractive people or those who can earn the big bucks with grace as well.
Pierre Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 Deceitful behavior (cheating) is not related to the physical appearance of a man or woman. However, I have heard about women that prefer uglier men so they can feel more at ease. This is simply a manifestation of personal insecurity. In fact, sometimes less attractive insecure men and women cheat to prove to themselves they are still attractive.
Mme. Chaucer Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 Well, anyway, welcome to the new "member." I'd like to suggest you form a support group, Mr. the wizard. There are a few other guys here who have exactly the same terrible problem that you do. They have the same posting style, too. You could have a smashing mutual admiration society together.
monkey00 Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 I wouldn't be surprised if this is true. If I see an attractive or model-type woman, I will automatically assume she has more mate choices over the average girl. And that she has lots of guys chasing her, which equals more competition. Now if it were switched genders, I can see how women would have this immediate stereotype when meeting a guy with looks. I mean even if someone thinks this or judges a book by its cover, it isn't necessarily true. Nor does it indicate that the person judging is insecure either. I think it's more of a defense mechanism to avoid getting involved + hurt at the same time. Given that the judger is a relationship type person and likes to move slowly.
Emilia Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 On the subject at hand, i was told by most women i've talked to, that they don't want that much of a good looking man. They will lust over one, but they would prefer if their guy is not that good looking because : 1 - a good looking guy is not naturally good looking. Maintenance factors in it and some are very narcissistic. 2 - a good looking guy has more options, more power in a relationship so the girl he is with might have some issues with it, if she doesn't have a high self-esteem. 3 - a good looking guy might be a huge player ... kinda funny seeing as how women are the best players (they don't want competition maybe ?) Then those women are very insecure or they have no idea how to choose a man based on factors beyond looks. You are basically saying what J200 said before you. I have dated some very decent looking guys, naturally good looking ones (I'm not into high maintenance because I find too much vanity a little laughable) but it really depends on the person, you can't generalise like this.
Ruby Slippers Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 My last boyfriend and my recent FWB are both very good-looking guys. But the most attractive quality about them is that they didn't act like they were above anything because of their looks. They dated and were friends with all kinds of people. Being so cool and down-to-earth just made them all the sexier.
Imageiko Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 I would never date nor be nor give attention to a very handsome man. Handsome men are more likely to cheat and have many options. Who wants to deal with that? We all know most men are only as faithful as their options. I do not feel comfortable at all around good looking men and prefer not to associate with them to be honest; they don't make me feel comfortable. Handsome men are very likely to cheat and take you for granted. They know they can get "better" than you and chances are they probably can get better. When they get sick of you (which they will) then they will upgrade you for someone hotter. Good looking men are nothing but trouble. Avoid at all costs. Same for wealthy men; they have too many options and are more likely to cheat. I would not consider either. Why deal with a man that all women want? Do you know how competitive and aggressive women can be around good looking guys? They are not afraid to start taking his clothes off and giving him a bj right on the spot. Good luck keeping a man in demand like that faithful. He won't ever be. Don't worry, with that attitude you won't be attracting any good looking men with a personality anytime soon!
Lil1 Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 Generally speaking here, are women naturally inclined to be more cautious with a handsome guy with personality who's good at making women laugh and a bit flirty? What if he smiles alot in conversation and is physically appealing to a woman's eye? Will women tread cautiously with him, make him "work" more so to speak? I think everyone is a little intimidated by beautiful people whether male or female. For me it really depends on how 'charming' and flirtatious the handsome man in question is. There is a fine line... and I have to say it's also somewhat of a blurry line because he could be a genuinely nice man and some women could misinterpret his politeness for something more. Personally I try not to judge people based on looks alone (though there are some instances when you can't help but judge... i.e. if I see a skin- head all tatted with scwhastikas I'm going to assume he/she is a racist person). If a handsome man's actions are those of a player then I won't give him the time of day - at least I won't take him seriously, no matter how gorgeous he is (a ons could be possible... though not likely cos it's not really how I roll ) Also, are women naturally inclined to have sex sooner with a less attractive guy rather than an attractive one due to security reasons? No. Well at least not this woman. Hehe.. if anything I would be more 'naturally' inclined to have sex sooner with a gorgeous guy than a not so good looking one. It's just 'nature' I think, I mean how often do you look at a fugly person and say oooh yeah I want some of that! - I know it sounds terribly shallow. But it's the truth... we all covet beauty to some extent. Then again, I wouldn't get into a relationship with a handsome man if he was a player, looks are always arbitrary when it comes to what truly matters to me - the heart and mind.
Author the wizard Posted November 15, 2011 Author Posted November 15, 2011 I think everyone is a little intimidated by beautiful people whether male or female. For me it really depends on how 'charming' and flirtatious the handsome man in question is. There is a fine line... and I have to say it's also somewhat of a blurry line because he could be a genuinely nice man and some women could misinterpret his politeness for something more. Personally I try not to judge people based on looks alone (though there are some instances when you can't help but judge... i.e. if I see a skin- head all tatted with scwhastikas I'm going to assume he/she is a racist person). If a handsome man's actions are those of a player then I won't give him the time of day - at least I won't take him seriously, no matter how gorgeous he is (a ons could be possible... though not likely cos it's not really how I roll ) No. Well at least not this woman. Hehe.. if anything I would be more 'naturally' inclined to have sex sooner with a gorgeous guy than a not so good looking one. It's just 'nature' I think, I mean how often do you look at a fugly person and say oooh yeah I want some of that! - I know it sounds terribly shallow. But it's the truth... we all covet beauty to some extent. Then again, I wouldn't get into a relationship with a handsome man if he was a player, looks are always arbitrary when it comes to what truly matters to me - the heart and mind. How do you gauge if he's a player or not?
smokey bear Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 im female my point of view is yes i would be weary that he is a player because of his looks. It wouldnt stop me dating him though, i would go on a few dates to see if he showed any signs, if he checked out ok, i would still proceed slowly, i wouldnt have sex without being officially girlfriend/boyfriend but i would engage in some sexual acts before this point eg, kissin, feeling bums etc but nothing classed as intimate, until in a relationshp. So in summary, yes id be weary no wouldnt put me off would show some sexual signs but not do the full deed. reading your post, this girl does come across as not interested, id be weary of her
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