Re: he thinks i'm a slob!

[Tony T]

First of all, don't let this get out of hand.

 

Simply tell him in a kind, loving way that this is the way you have lived all your life and you simply will not tolerate a timekeeper in the house setting deadlines for cleaning. If he continues this behavior after you have told him it is not acceptable, then kick him out.

 

If he chooses to clean things himself, tell him that's fine but to keep his complaints to himself. You did not say whether or not you were charging him for staying with you but if you aren't he has no right to say a word.

 

Now if he is paying half of the living expenses, this is a gray area and he should move if the place is not to his liking.

 

Sounds like a romance made in heaven, you lovebirds you!!!

[Jenna]

You are sooo angry about this- I could almost hear your voice getting louder and louder as I read your post.

 

Are there other issues here? I mean- I guess it's possible to have a great relationship- other than this one little peeve of yours- although its not likely.

 

Could your man need a little recognition for what he does around the house?? If so- then you deserve the same recognition for the things you do. It seems like if you have a desire to work this out (and I really couldn't tell one way or the other)- you both could come to a calm and rational solution and eliminate this petty fighting. Maybe showing a little appreciation for each other and the efforts you make in the home and in the relationship would help. You have to present your concerns about this in a calm manner if you expect him to respond calmly. (Did I mention "calm and rational?")

 

Now, if he is just being a horses ass - and acting like everyone owes him something- even after you have "calmly" and "rationally" voiced your feelings- tell him the next time he takes the trash out -to keep on walking.

 

Good Luck, Jenna

First of all, don't let this get out of hand.

 

Simply tell him in a kind, loving way that this is the way you have lived all your life and you simply will not tolerate a timekeeper in the house setting deadlines for cleaning. If he continues this behavior after you have told him it is not acceptable, then kick him out. If he chooses to clean things himself, tell him that's fine but to keep his complaints to himself. You did not say whether or not you were charging him for staying with you but if you aren't he has no right to say a word. Now if he is paying half of the living expenses, this is a gray area and he should move if the place is not to his liking. Sounds like a romance made in heaven, you lovebirds you!!!

[Jenna]

Are you the same BJ that posted "short people" ??

 

I just noticed the names- and in one of them you were Julie?? That could get rather confusing- especially to the people that are trying to help you. Try to stick with one name so we will recognize you. (If you are all the same that is) Thanks, Jenna

You are sooo angry about this- I could almost hear your voice getting louder and louder as I read your post. Are there other issues here? I mean- I guess it's possible to have a great relationship- other than this one little peeve of yours- although its not likely. Could your man need a little recognition for what he does around the house?? If so- then you deserve the same recognition for the things you do. It seems like if you have a desire to work this out (and I really couldn't tell one way or the other)- you both could come to a calm and rational solution and eliminate this petty fighting. Maybe showing a little appreciation for each other and the efforts you make in the home and in the relationship would help. You have to present your concerns about this in a calm manner if you expect him to respond calmly. (Did I mention "calm and rational?") Now, if he is just being a horses ass - and acting like everyone owes him something- even after you have "calmly" and "rationally" voiced your feelings- tell him the next time he takes the trash out -to keep on walking. Good Luck, Jenna