fenderjames Posted November 20, 2011 Share Posted November 20, 2011 Ive read quite a few posts lately re: dumper contacted dumpee via text, email, whatever . The posts ask from the dumpee's point of view " how should they respond " . Well, I can tell you this from 100% certainty : do not respond . I was " let go " by her simply ignoring me out of the blue . Its been 3mos NC . Let me tell you, saying nothing at all says more than you could ever say . I used to wonder what she was thinking , why did she do this etc . Now I know , silence is so loud ! It says " I'm indifferent , I don't care , I don't want you around , and I certainly have nothing to say to you . Ever . So , if you want to send a clear message that will not be mis-understood or leave you regretting how you stated things , just ignore their bread crumbs . I would like to state that I would never do this unsolicited . It was done to me and its a terrible , cheap , cowardly thing to do to someone . But if it was done to you ..... then I feel you are justified in doing it right back to the one who felt it was OK to do this . You are not lowering yourself to their level - you are protecting yourself and showing them that you have nothing to say to one so callous and rude . Yes, silence has a sound - and it is louder than you could ever be with words . Link to post Share on other sites
stunned8165 Posted November 20, 2011 Share Posted November 20, 2011 I hope you are right about this. She left me for her boss, taking her two kids with her who have no dad, and me being they only dad they know after 3 years. They are just 4 & 5....She left at the end of May.... But I tried reaching out with low contact up until over 5 weeks ago. I shut her down with an e mail telling her I was tired of being ignored and treated like I was the one that cheated........ So for over 5 weeks, I have said nothing. But now after not seeing a sign of her anywhere for 5 months, she has suddenly coveniently showed up in traffic twice in a week and a half on my what she knows as my usual route home from work... If I know her, both times I bet she was expecting me to say something.. But it's not coming. I hope it drives her crazy. Link to post Share on other sites
J0N Posted November 20, 2011 Share Posted November 20, 2011 I too decided (ages ago) that if she ever reached out to me I would simply not respond. The only exception being if it was something really important or her apologizing for how she treated me. I would take nothing less than a face to face either, if she ever wants to contact me again she will have to learn that you can't hide behind technology. the silence is deafening. Link to post Share on other sites
stunned8165 Posted November 20, 2011 Share Posted November 20, 2011 I'll agree with you. I have always told her that. You have something to say, I deserve a face to face. But they usually don't have the balls to do that after how they have treated us because they are ashamed. Link to post Share on other sites
J0N Posted November 20, 2011 Share Posted November 20, 2011 IF she is human she has to feel guilty about the way she treated me. Honestly if she approached me to apologize I would be so stunned that I wouldn't know how to handle it. I don't have to worry, she will never show her face in front of me again, she is a coward. Link to post Share on other sites
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