what do you think ?

[tomm]

hiya

i have a dilema going on here that's new to me ,figured i could get some answers/advice on .

I was dummped about 6 months ago after a 4 yr exclusive relationship [ knew her for 2 yrs prior] ,the relationship was good no fighting,arguing etc. didn't live together but when together always kissed good night , said i love you etc.

One night she just leaves me [litterally] walks out of my place as i was running an errand left a box on my counter of jewelery i've givin her over the yrs .of course i call [get no answer] maybe 2 days later i swing by her place see her just ask why / what happend ? i got ''it's not you , it's me, ''i love you but not in love with you'' , ''i'm confused'' , ''you did nothing wrong '' .none make sense to me .K we go low contact for a while,then we go no contact.she said she considers me a ''friend'' i tell her sorry i don't feel that between us now .

I've seen her with a guy,my frinds have seen also .as we talk i ask '' if theirs someone else let me know, you know what i've seen and kind of know'' she says ''i'm not with anyone '' [total lie] .

Her dad dies ,i feel bad [ i knew the guy] i send a card- she calls and thanks me for the card . we start talking some.

NOW yesterday by chance i run into her at a store i say hi , she says hi .i ask ''if i did nothing wrong , why are we apart'' ? that's hard for me to swallow .

SHE says call me later we can talk some ,i do .

i'm getting a-lot of different reasons [ which are minor some down right lame] why we're apart . every ''excuse'' i get i calmly explain to her

[like she felt used for a bit] i didn't have a car ,i'd borrow hers put gas in it , clean it .if i got tickets to an event we took her car sometimes she'd drive , sometimes i would .excuses like that i'm getting . to me it was i'm in a rough spot now am saving for a car ,but sill want to take you out .

THEN she mentioned i've said i'd like things to ''change'' k i didn't mean like change you - i met you this way fell for you , you fell for me .when i mentioned''change'' i was meaning compromise. you go out with the girls fri or sat night fine after that we hook up watch a movie,eat something,talk whatever.

these are the types of ''excuses'' she's giving me ,none which are even valid [ to me] and when i explain myself to her they make sense .

is she fishing for a reason i may believe on why we're apart ? is she trying to validate what she's done in her mind ?

what do you guys [and girls ] make of this type of situation

oh f.y.i. i'm 47 she is 50