**GF with EX 2 days after breakup**

[punkinless]

hi all. this is my first post. i'm on a different forum site all the timebut this one is a lil umm different to me. just lettin u know this is gunna bea loooooooooong post and i hope some of you read it all and can try and help me. . . i'm gunna start at the beginning.

 

i was in highschool, a senior. i had lots of friends. two very best friends.but i never had a girlfriend. never kissed a girl. never been on a officialdate. i wasn't a nerd. i played sports. did ok in school. got out and partied.it just never happened.

 

so i had these 2 best friends (also seniors). i'll call em bob and frank.anyways we always went to bobs house after school. he lived on a farm and wewere outside boys. he has a massive shop/garage and we were always workin onour "toys" (four wheelers, snowmobiles, anything with a motor). andwe did a lot of riding. now bob has a sister who was only a sophmore at thetime. this is the girl i'm head over heels about. i'll call her punkin (longstory). she was 16 and i was 17. she had a boyfriend i'll call ahole (longstory).

 

so i'm livin the senior in highschool life until i'm like crap! senior promis coming up. i CAN NOT go stag to my senior prom. so i was just lookin for adate. not love. had a few girls in mind, but punkin wasn't one of them. like isaw her from time to time but i never thought about tryin to hook up with her.then there was trouble in paradice with punkin and her boyfriend. all him. theywere unofficialy over and i was texting her just as a friend as she startedhangin out with us in the shop more and more.

 

he did things that were horrible. they dated for 2 years without sex. (stillkinda young) one day he said have sex with me or we’re over. wow dick. she did.THE WORST experience of her life she said. she was a virgin he wasn't. he alsocheated on her with her best friend. he was an ahole (hense the name ahole)his family is ***ed up. just nothing good about him really.

 

one day she called me crying. she was at her house alone and she needed togo to aholes house to finalize the breakup. i went to her house and waitedfor her to come back. she came back a mess and crying and i gave her thebiggest longest hug ever. once she was allright i went home cuz it was late andwe started texting regularly.

 

i made her laugh all the time and she got over him pretty fast (so ithought) i started liking her pretty quick and we started hangin out but i knewto take it slow cuz i didn't wan't to be a rebound. we went on four wheelerrides and sruff all the time. i almost killed her a couple times but shetrusted me even tho i felt really bad. (met a truck up on a blind hill on anarrow trail doin like 70. wowsers) about a month later i worked up the courageto ask her to prom. she knew i was gunna ask her. lol. she said yes. we kepthanging out but i took everything really slow. mostly because it was my firsttime with everything and i was nervous. we eventually started snuggling andwatching movies and holding hands stuff like that. but it took me forever tokiss her! the first time we did i remember i could barley stand. legs likejello.

 

for a looooong time after that everything was perfect. a few weeks later atthe end of may 2011 we made it official. we spent a lot of time together. sawher literally everyday. blew off my friends. (bad). bob didn't care i wasdating his sister cuz he knew i was good. lookin bak we did spend too much timetogether but we were happy. went to prom in june. also perfect. very littlefighting ever. did everything together. truley in love, not just lust.

 

not only did i love her to death but i loved the whole package. her brother.my best friend. her older brother. good friends. her dad. i liked him and heliked me a lot and i helped him with farm stuff. her stupid little dog. lovedthat thing. her step-mom. ehhhh no-one liked her. lol. her real mom who livedout of town but we went there and spent the night all the time. shes awsome.moms boyfriend was ok. her baby brother. oh my god the coolest kid. she lovedmy whole family i loved her whole family. just a perfect picture.

 

but i had to eventually go to college. 4 years an hour and a half away. homeevery weekend. it tore her apart. we were too used to spending too much timetogether. problems started to arise when i couldn't get my feeling to her overthe phone like i did in person. we got threw the first year ok. still lots oflove.

 

christmas 2010 was the best one i ever had by far. she got me a top of theline helmet cam (after i just totaled my wheeler and had a freshly broken colorbone, oops). and i was gunna get her a promise ring but too much too quick so igot her a little white gold heart necklace with a dimond on it. she loved it.she never took it off. ever. for many many months. slept with it, showered withit . . . lol.

 

everything was still great. she allways said thank you from rescueing me from "ahole" he was a jerk and ur such a better guy than him onevery level. she was jumping the gun but she always said we were gettin marriedand said she couldn't wait till we could get our own place. what pets shewanted. stuff like that. i agreed. but it wasn't until one week coming homefrom college headed to her house that i realized that it was what i REALLYwanted. sun was setting. good life by one rebublic on the radio. i realizedthat i was still young, and she was my first everything, but i thought aboutbeing with only her my whole life and liked it. i didn't care what else was outthere. i wanted this. i waited, found the perfect girl the first time and thats it.

 

july 2011, **** hit the fan. she had been saying for awile that she wasn'tvery happy. and it was hard to help from college. she said when she was upsetthat i didn't know how to make her feel better. and this was at the same timeshe was in highschool and working 2 jobs after school. like she put in a hard15hr day many times a week. i told her she was stressed and she needed to pickone job but she didn't. she also got mad at me for no reason sometimes andcomplained i didn't really "talk" to her when i was at college.

 

so she said she needed a break. i was devistated but respected it. i thoughtwe would take a couple weeks no contact and then miss each other like crazy andBAM, get back together. almost worked. she came to my house a couple weekslater saying she wanted to get back together. BUT she had to tell me somethin.at first shes like i rode in a tractor with "ahole" and we talked.i was pissed but ok. then she like we might have accidently kissed . . . twice.well i flew off the handle. yelled, tore her a new one. "ahole?! u kissed ahole?! the same ahole who you hate and i saved you from?! she was reallyupset and really tried to show she was sorry. she even told me that somehow sheknew for sure that she never wanted to be with him ever again. she was gunna gobut i told her to stay. i cooled down and gave her a big hug. then afterthinkin about it i grabbed her head and planted one on her. i loved her. andshe came back. me over him. how could i refuse? She insisted we continuecounting months like nothing happened. even tho she kissed another guy. shedidn't cheat tho. idk. it bothered me for a awile but i never made anything ofit.

 

i let stuff go back to normal (STUPID STUPID). we were happy again for awilebut she went back to being unhappy. looking back i know everything i did wrong.all stupid little things that added to one big problem. we went to a weddingout of state for one of her family friends one weekend. we fought or sat insilence the whole way there. once there we slept on the same couch and snuggledthe whole night. mini fix. the next night she slept on the other couch cuz shesaid it wasn't comfortable. we were at the wedding reception and she wouldn'tdance with me. i'm not a dancer myself but i had to of asked her a half dozentimes. then i was like next slow song and she said yea but was nowhere to befound when it was on. then her dad asked her to dance and she got right up andwent. so there i was. sittin at this table all bymyself watchin her on thedancefloor thinkin about our relationship. i couldn't hold the tears back. iwent outside and found this bench far away and just bawled my eyes out. ididn't want to lose her but i knew i was. about 10 min later she came outsideand found me still crying. she sat on my lap and we hugged and cryed for like15 min and i kept telling her i loved her and didn't want to lose her and thati was sorry for everything. i was a complete mess. i held her the whole tripback home.

 

STILL she was unhappy. (my fault) she said stuff like loving her wasn'tenough and i didn't know how to be her boyfriend.

 

she broke up with me on september 29th 2011. the second i got home fromcollege. after 16 months. no break. broken up.

 

i lost it. bad. couldn't even function. got in my truck and just drove. wentup on some old dirt roads and poundin the **** out of my truck. punched thesteering wheel about 100 times. bruised my hand. found some booze and went towhere one of my friends was killed on snowmobile and sat down. called my bestfriends. couldn't help me. finally got home and went to bed at almost daylight.

 

october 2nd. "ahole" is at her house! wow am i ***in livid. hestarts postin wink faces and stuff on her facebook wall. like wow. back off ahole. its only been 3 days.

 

oct 8. its facebook official. shes in a relationship with ahole. you thinki lost it before? well u should picture me this time. i try talkin to her. saidsome things i shouldn't. she got mad at me. i said stuff like you told me overand over and over NEVER AGAIN with him. LIES. hes an ahole and you saw itfirst hand! I SAVED YOU FROM HIM NOW YOU'RE JUST GUNNA THROW ALL OF THAT AWAY?!turns out yes.

 

she has not tried to contact me once sense the break up. i have her a fewtimes. its never good. i see her every weekend with ahole cuz i have to see my best friend. she never makes eye contact with me or even acknowledges i'mstill alive. she deleted every picture of us off facebook. i don't sleep. idon't fall asleep till 4 or 5am and i wake up at noon or even later. i miss ALOT of classes at college. even if i make a point to go i can't concentrate.still. and its been almost 2 months. i'm failing most classes. shes all i thinkabout. she is really happy right now tho. at least she acts it. i try to behappy and the life of the party when she around (all the time) havn't talked toher in person yet. i kept the helmet cam and she kept her necklace. obviouslyshe dosn't wear it. she gave me back my senior sweatshirt i gave her.

 

i've written letter upon letter that i've never sent. it would just makee itworse right now. everyone tells me to move on. theres plenty of others. butthere really isn't. not even at college. even if there were i couldn't. i crydamn near every night. i drink a lot now. i never did before. every minute ofeveryday was about her and now i got nuthin. its such a big change that i can'thandle it. my friends are sick of hearing about it so they tell me to shut up.my parents know i'm miserable. i get pissed very easy.

 

but i know this "ahole" and hes no good. i'm just like no bigdeal, when he messes up i'll be nearby bein myself. i'll win her heart all overagain. but they lasted 2 years b4 . . . idk. i'm truely in love her, not justher company, her. i'd do anything for her to this day. hell i had to have bobchange the oil in her car cuz i knew it needed it...

 

but i think about ahole as my replacment and i'm like wow. how degrading.cuz thats wat he was, a replacment. its physically impossible to go from"i hate you ahole" to "i love you" in a week. she justneeded someone to fill the hole i left. i know they are having sex and stuff and its like KILL ME NOW!

 

thats where i get my hope. she'll realize i'm so much better and comerunning back. not that i would let her so quick. but i would.

 

please read this book and help me. i don't want to move on. i love her very much. and i know we can make each other very very happy if given another chance.

Edited November 22, 2011 by punkinless

[punkinless]

this is the letter i wish to hand write and send to her but it isn't a good time and idk if there ever will be a good time . .

 

Dearest"punkin",

 

I know now that something had to change in our relationship.And it was the best for both of us at the time. I loved you and you loved mebut I just wasn’t being a good boyfriend and we were smothering each other. Youwere unhappy and I knew it. I’m not sure what I was thinking . . . maybe I justthought it would work itself out, but one way or another I let you, the love ofmy life, the one girl I had been waiting for, get away. I kick myself every dayand every time I think about it. I may have let you down, but I loved you fromthe start.

 

I know it wasn’t easy for you to do,and I took it pretty hard. You were the biggest part of my life, and meant theworld to me, and I loved you to death. But I started taking you for granted,among other things. I want to apologize to you too. Right after the breakup Iwas sour and was like, “How could she do this to me?” But I was being selfishand I know you only did it because you felt like you only had one way out. But,I don’t blame you anymore. I unintentionally pushed you to do it. I also,wanted to say sorry for everything I said about him. I only know him for thebad, and maybe he really has changed.

 

After lying in bed awake for a long time I realized whatwent wrong. I don’t know why it took me so long, because you were basicallytelling me the whole time. I smothered you. I never got mad at you. I was ajerk sometimes. Like at college when I didn’t talk to you like I did when I washome. I didn’t know how to make you feel better when you were upset, but Icared so much, you have no idea. My reason for loving you was very selfish. Iremember one time I told you I loved you because, “I would go insane withoutyou.” Now how selfish was that? I was so taking you for granted. I wish youwould just ask me that question one more time. I never ditched you for "bob" and"frank". Just a bunch of little things I did that turned into one big problem.It’s kind of ironic because if we would have just fought more we would probablystill be together. Weird.

 

Now I know "punkin". I knowher quite well, and when I was no longer in the picture I left a huge hole inher life. Think about how much of your time I took up. You were unhappy and nowlonely, so you went to someone that would make you not lonely. "ahole". I don’tblame you one bit. I basically pushed you into his arms. Again, kicking myself.I know you’re happy now, I can see it in your eyes, but for how long?

 

"Punkin", I know you more than anybody else in this entireworld. Right now you’re probably thinking I’m happy with him, so I’ll just staywith him. But he already proved to you that he can’t handle a seriousrelationship. If you can forgive all the things he did to you then you’re abigger person than I am. (No, that is that a fat joke.) Let me take a wildguess . . . you let him back into your life a couple weeks ago and he’sprobably already spouting off “I love you” every chance he gets. That’s notlove. That’s blind affection. He needs you instead of the other way around andthat’s not right. Seriously, I’m taking a stand right now and telling you thatI KNOW I can make you MUCH happier and that I know EXACTLY how to do it. And Iwould do it all for YOU. You may see us breaking up as the end, but I see it asa new beginning and a chance for us to prove ourselves we can make it throughanything. You have no idea how many hours and days I have spent analyzing ourrelationship from every angle. After fixing the little things that I was doingwrong everything points to us being one. On top of that I know I can make youthat happy FOREVER. I’m not like most guys, I don’t want to be with a bunch ofdifferent girls and play the field. I waited for the perfect woman and thatwoman is YOU. I want the whole shi-bang, love, living together, rings, pets (evenfaint goats), and kids. Yes, I’ve even thought of you as a parent of mychildren. I mean you are excellent with your baby brother, you wanted to be ateacher at one point, and you work at an after school program. I was like shewould be the best mom in the world!

 

I know at one point you were thinking the EXACT same thing.I remember us snuggling one time and you asking me “are we gunna get married?”in that cute little voice you always used. And I remember in my head being like“WHAAAAAAAAAAAATT?!?” but I said “of course!” Not long after that I thoughtabout it again and I was 100% sure that’s what I wanted. I also remember youwanting nothing more than to move out of your house and live with me. Well I happento have a friend with a huge house and he already said I was more than welcometo move in with him. And I might just do that this summer.

 

How do I know I love only YOU and not just anybody else? Letme paint a picture for you . . . I was driving home from college one week, onmy way to see my punkin seed (boy it feels good to say that again). I wasalmost there and I was just cresting a big hill as the sun was on its way down.Over the hill I could see a lot of the good ol’ LC and the huge line ofwindmills and the sunset made for a remarkable view. The song “Good Life” byOne Republic was playing and I had it blaring and I was singing along just likeme and you used to do to “my love is your drug” lol. At that very moment Irealized something. I realized that even though we were young, and you were myfirst everything, that it didn’t scare me at all if you were the only one I waswith my entire life. I actually liked how perfect it was. That’s when Irealized I was truly in love with you, and that you were the only for me.

 

Now I’m not writing this to you in hopes that you’llimmediately break up with "ahole" and come running into my arms. I’m not a homewrecker. I know he hurt you in more ways than one, I was there. But if youthink he has changed, and you are happy, and can see yourself being with him forever,then I have no intentions of stopping you. As long as I know you are happy thatwould be more than okay with me. It’s just that I would feel like complete crapif we missed out on something special.

 

I guess I’m kind of thanking you too. This was a lifechanging wake up call for me and now I know not to make these mistakes againand really work at a relationship. And that spending a lot of time togetherdoesn’t necessarily make a relationship stronger. I know I should have realizedall of this the first time we had problems and went on a break. But I guess Ijust needed to be completely withdrawn from you for a few weeks and reallystudy what went wrong before I could fix it. Now this is all I’m asking you todo . . . "Punkin", just take a step back, from everything, forget about me, andforget about clayton. Now picture how you want your life to be, and make allyour decisions based on that goal, and what will make you the happiest thelongest.

 

Just remember that I’m never too far away and if you everneed someone to talk to I’m here for you. I don’t think there is a single otherperson out there that wants the best for you more than I do. This letter isn’tintended to make you feel bad, or guilty, or upset. I don’t have any cheesysongs to send you, and I’m not going to get on my knees and beg you to comeback. I just have all of these feelings about you and I’m not completely sureyou know them. Nothing I’ve said here is anything shy of the truth, and it allcame from the heart. It took me over 17 years to find you, and I’ll be damnedif I let you get away without a fight. It’s your move.

 

“There is one moment in your life when you are with someone& you feel like the world has stopped & your life seems so perfect,Make sure you never lose that person . . .”

 

- AuthorUnknown

 

Love,

"Punkinless"

Edited November 22, 2011 by punkinless

[punkinless]

really need some help here :/ sorry its so long . . . but i'm gunna try and catch some sleep.

[chados]

really need some help here :/ sorry its so long . . . but i'm gunna try and catch some sleep.

 

 

well it might be a long message, but i found it interesting to read, because it defines how lovelife can be both good and bad. you just dont know how bad you can feel until you've lost someone you love, and its your first love, most times thats even harder. dont send her any letter apologizing because you've done nothing wrong, and trust me you will get over her, since you haven't been with another person you might not realize this yet, but i promise you that. i also know that you didn't ask about this advice so im gonna try to help you out.

 

 

even though i think she has acted bad against you, you still insist taking her back. there's a chance that you miss having her around more then you actually miss her. and this is extremely hard for you to know because she was your first "its not just because shes your first, i feel the same as you right now" but it makes it more difficult for you to admit. i dont think she deserves any respect from you, but thats what you have to give her to win her back.

 

you dont wanna disrespect her by saying, "I" dont think you got the right/should be together with that guy. because in 99% of the cases the dumpee will loose this battle. as far as i can see, there's two ways to do this.

either you go NC and wait until she replies.

 

or you send her a email telling her, you know what, im glad you brought this up, i saw this coming and i think this is the best for us both "yes i really insist you should tell her your happy with the decision". and then NC, and i really mean NC.

 

i also wanna say that i think you should go dating. this will not "in this case" push her further away, it will probably do the opposite. hope this will help you, wish you the best

[punkinless]

well it might be a long message, but i found it interesting to read, because it defines how lovelife can be both good and bad. you just dont know how bad you can feel until you've lost someone you love, and its your first love, most times thats even harder. dont send her any letter apologizing because you've done nothing wrong, and trust me you will get over her, since you haven't been with another person you might not realize this yet, but i promise you that. i also know that you didn't ask about this advice so im gonna try to help you out.

 

 

even though i think she has acted bad against you, you still insist taking her back. there's a chance that you miss having her around more then you actually miss her. and this is extremely hard for you to know because she was your first "its not just because shes your first, i feel the same as you right now" but it makes it more difficult for you to admit. i dont think she deserves any respect from you, but thats what you have to give her to win her back.

 

you dont wanna disrespect her by saying, "I" dont think you got the right/should be together with that guy. because in 99% of the cases the dumpee will loose this battle. as far as i can see, there's two ways to do this.

either you go NC and wait until she replies.

 

or you send her a email telling her, you know what, im glad you brought this up, i saw this coming and i think this is the best for us both "yes i really insist you should tell her your happy with the decision". and then NC, and i really mean NC.

 

i also wanna say that i think you should go dating. this will not "in this case" push her further away, it will probably do the opposite. hope this will help you, wish you the best

 

glad u find it interesting. cuz lookin bak it is looooong. that part about not knowing what u had till its gone. hit the nail on the head with that one. she even told me this herself one of the few times i contacted her . . .

 

AND she IS my first love, which makes it hard, but i really convinced myself that shes all i want in a girl. like we're so alike its scary. both love the outdoors. stuff like that.

 

and u are right, i miss her company a TON. like not goin straight to her house from college kills me. not having someone to really talk to while at college, especially when i'm bored, killer. but i also love HER not just her company. like everything about her. i won't even start listing stuff cuz it would turn into my first post length wise.

 

the only situation i'm holding near my heart right now is she was unhappy. ok. instead of breaking up and stayin alone and pissed she got with someone who would give her attention, a rebound. ahole. the "i love yous" started pouring out of them within literally 3 or 4 days. (even tho she hated his guts weeks before.) so wat i want to believe is he is a temporary replacement for me but once the shine of a new relationship wears off she will miss me and what we had back and the first time ahole messes up she comes runnin to me. of course i would play it cool and be like i don't need you but eventually let her back in.

 

i have tried NC. sense a couple weeks after the break. i caved once or twice. but for most part NC. last 4 weeks or so i havn't talked to her at all. not long i know but it seems like forever. it hurts me that she hasn't tried to contact me at all. and when i did contact her she only gave very very short responses and never asked about me. ouch. no contact is aslo very hard when your at the same house she is every weekend. i go to bobs house (his own house with his girlfriend just down the road from punkins house.) to party and be his best friend and she is always there with ahole. sometime just for a minute, or hours. we never talk. i look but she dosn't look back.

 

in my opinion she dosn't "deserve" me back. i messed up durring the relationship, she messed up after. but i'm all about her and if she is smiling i'm smiling. but i just know ahole is gunna hurt her and most guys in my spot would be like YAY. but i don't want her upset. she stressed with life as it is. i know i can make her happy, and it dosn't take much to make me happy honestly. she was doin a dam fine job for most of the relationship except for the very end . . . i can see my self with her in the future. no problem. at least another shot. i know they won't last. its a fact. and she dosn't know how to be alone anymore . . . the question is when? next month? 4 months? a year? 2 years? prolly right about the time i get over her according to murphys law . . . my awsome plan was to somehow win her bak and take her to HER prom like i took her to mine. symbolizing a do-over. start from scratch. i got many things i would different . . . just dreams as of right. speakin of dreams i can count 3 time that i have dreamed getting back together with her. the last two times i woke up with a goofy ass grin on my face and actually believed it happened for a few minutes. then i'm like oh, bitch slap by reality . . . i love reading responses tho!

[chados]

glad u find it interesting. cuz lookin bak it is looooong. that part about not knowing what u had till its gone. hit the nail on the head with that one. she even told me this herself one of the few times i contacted her . . .

 

AND she IS my first love, which makes it hard, but i really convinced myself that shes all i want in a girl. like we're so alike its scary. both love the outdoors. stuff like that.

 

and u are right, i miss her company a TON. like not goin straight to her house from college kills me. not having someone to really talk to while at college, especially when i'm bored, killer. but i also love HER not just her company. like everything about her. i won't even start listing stuff cuz it would turn into my first post length wise.

 

the only situation i'm holding near my heart right now is she was unhappy. ok. instead of breaking up and stayin alone and pissed she got with someone who would give her attention, a rebound. ahole. the "i love yous" started pouring out of them within literally 3 or 4 days. (even tho she hated his guts weeks before.) so wat i want to believe is he is a temporary replacement for me but once the shine of a new relationship wears off she will miss me and what we had back and the first time ahole messes up she comes runnin to me. of course i would play it cool and be like i don't need you but eventually let her back in.

 

i have tried NC. sense a couple weeks after the break. i caved once or twice. but for most part NC. last 4 weeks or so i havn't talked to her at all. not long i know but it seems like forever. it hurts me that she hasn't tried to contact me at all. and when i did contact her she only gave very very short responses and never asked about me. ouch. no contact is aslo very hard when your at the same house she is every weekend. i go to bobs house (his own house with his girlfriend just down the road from punkins house.) to party and be his best friend and she is always there with ahole. sometime just for a minute, or hours. we never talk. i look but she dosn't look back.

 

in my opinion she dosn't "deserve" me back. i messed up durring the relationship, she messed up after. but i'm all about her and if she is smiling i'm smiling. but i just know ahole is gunna hurt her and most guys in my spot would be like YAY. but i don't want her upset. she stressed with life as it is. i know i can make her happy, and it dosn't take much to make me happy honestly. she was doin a dam fine job for most of the relationship except for the very end . . . i can see my self with her in the future. no problem. at least another shot. i know they won't last. its a fact. and she dosn't know how to be alone anymore . . . the question is when? next month? 4 months? a year? 2 years? prolly right about the time i get over her according to murphys law . . . my awsome plan was to somehow win her bak and take her to HER prom like i took her to mine. symbolizing a do-over. start from scratch. i got many things i would different . . . just dreams as of right. speakin of dreams i can count 3 time that i have dreamed getting back together with her. the last two times i woke up with a goofy ass grin on my face and actually believed it happened for a few minutes. then i'm like oh, bitch slap by reality . . . i love reading responses tho!

 

 

i know how youre feeling man, he might be a rebound, no doubt about that, but never ever talk to her when she's with a new guy, that will only mess things up, be strong, if you have to talk to her, tell her that you agree with the breakup, i can see now that this was the best thing for us both, after that NO CONTACT,

 

if there's any chance thats she's missing you right now you have to use it. if you want something that could really help you out give me your email/you could make a new one so you dont have to post it here where everyone can see it. and i could send you some stuff that really made me understand my situation better. and no she doesn't deserve you. i mean if she dumps you she should respect you before dating, at least before showing you that she is. its a weak behavior to smash it into your face like that.

 

remember to keep your dignity, you will be happy with or without her, just a matter of time. and when i say that i mean, dont give her your attention because you will not get anything back, not right now.

[punkinless]

i'm understand this is gunna be hard . . . sucks. i don't want to say i know whats better for her more than she does but i honestly think i do . . . lol. i know her backwards and front.

i don't want to make her out like a complete bitch after the breakup. cuz she isn't. i'm friends with one of her girlfriends and she has told me stuff such as "she said shes not gunna kiss and stuff when your around cuz she dosn't want to be a bitch."

 

will her seeing me all the time (no talking tho) affect no contact?

 

and i've been kinda manipulating my facebook trying to make her jealous. like little things.

 

any chance you can post some links or sumthin instead of email? i was gunna PM u bbut this forum dosn't have the option?

[chados]

i'm understand this is gunna be hard . . . sucks. i don't want to say i know whats better for her more than she does but i honestly think i do . . . lol. i know her backwards and front.

i don't want to make her out like a complete bitch after the breakup. cuz she isn't. i'm friends with one of her girlfriends and she has told me stuff such as "she said shes not gunna kiss and stuff when your around cuz she dosn't want to be a bitch."

 

will her seeing me all the time (no talking tho) affect no contact?

 

and i've been kinda manipulating my facebook trying to make her jealous. like little things.

 

any chance you can post some links or sumthin instead of email? i was gunna PM u bbut this forum dosn't have the option?

 

well thats a healthy relationship for her. not being able to kiss her boyfriend when youre there. seeing you all the time might affect her, either she feels uncomfortable or she starts to miss you, but it will affect YOU. you are suppose to move on with your life, even if you want her back you have to be the guy she fell inlove with,

 

not the miserable guy you are now. you have to be confident, dont show her that you care, and thats hard when you see her every day. you can PM her, but you need 1 month time here i think. i dont remember the link, its a mp3file. but just make a new email for this one time.

[punkinless]

i hold it together when shes around . . . life of the party, attention on me. while her new boy lays on the couch and watches tv.lol. it is very hard to do this. like i'm exhausted and pissed off once i'm away from her. but its worth it.

 

holidays suck major balls. her family celebrates thanksgiving a day early. i was there last year. i love her family. there is actually 3 ppl that are going to be there that i really want to see. (not her). this meant she could have thanksgiving with my family too. you know, just som dam memories . . . don't even get me started on christmas . . . thats gunna be baaaad.

 

anyways i'll post bak when i get around to making another email later tonight.it feels good to talked to someone un biased. or just talk in general.

[chados]

i hold it together when shes around . . . life of the party, attention on me. while her new boy lays on the couch and watches tv.lol. it is very hard to do this. like i'm exhausted and pissed off once i'm away from her. but its worth it.

 

holidays suck major balls. her family celebrates thanksgiving a day early. i was there last year. i love her family. there is actually 3 ppl that are going to be there that i really want to see. (not her). this meant she could have thanksgiving with my family too. you know, just som dam memories . . . don't even get me started on christmas . . . thats gunna be baaaad.

 

anyways i'll post bak when i get around to making another email later tonight.it feels good to talked to someone un biased. or just talk in general.

 

 

alright, yeah maybe it is, if youre talking with friend you might only hear the good things. ill se if im awake. its 2.30 here:) if im sleeping ill do it tomorrow.

[punkinless]

bestfriend "bob" just got outta work. so i call him up and asked what the plan is and hes like goin to dinner with my girlfriend and "punkin" and "ahole" wowwwww do i ever feel replaced this happened like 5 min ago . . .

[chados]

bestfriend "bob" just got outta work. so i call him up and asked what the plan is and hes like goin to dinner with my girlfriend and "punkin" and "ahole" wowwwww do i ever feel replaced this happened like 5 min ago . . .

 

 

 

im sorry man, but you know this doesn't change anything, do not care about this. his still your friend. its just a dinner.

[punkinless]

oh don't get me wrong. we're best friends for life. its just stuuuuuuuuupid and i'm pissed.

 

usually (before punkin) they would invite me to dinner and i would go stag. obviously can't do that now . . .

 

and now that i think about it i hope my bestfriend isn't being two faced. me being his best friend . . . her being his sister . . . he prolly has to be. prolly sucks for him too, dam, sorry bud

[chados]

oh don't get me wrong. we're best friends for life. its just stuuuuuuuuupid and i'm pissed.

 

usually (before punkin) they would invite me to dinner and i would go stag. obviously can't do that now . . .

 

and now that i think about it i hope my bestfriend isn't being two faced. me being his best friend . . . her being his sister . . . he prolly has to be. prolly sucks for him too, dam, sorry bud

 

 

her sister? thats a problem, no but seriously. what i mean is.. even if you know nothing will change, theres still things that are spinning in your head. for instance lets say your ex is typing "out shopping" on facebook, you want to make it like this, and correct me if im wrong. "out shopping with my boyfriend" or out shopping and tonight im going to a party". see what i mean? you are blind by the fact that you cant think straight.

 

you see stuff that your mind is making up. i do this all the time. and it sucks. thats why you dont want to know everything. btw what did you do to make her jealous on facebook?

[punkinless]

never really have done that . . .

 

i "attempted" on facebook and stil do sometimes to make her jealous. or try to just make her remember things. like i'll say "watching afv" one of her fav shows. or "going hunting but i can't spot deer to save my life" shes good at spotting deer. or i posted sumthin about how i can't wait to break out the helmet cam this winter. (the one she bought me) another one was using one of her quotes on how life is too short to be unhappy. but she dosn't know that i know she likes the quote. haha. just sneaky stuff.

[punkinless]

recovered old email address. i have 8000 messages, lol. [email protected]

[chados]

never really have done that . . .

 

i "attempted" on facebook and stil do sometimes to make her jealous. or try to just make her remember things. like i'll say "watching afv" one of her fav shows. or "going hunting but i can't spot deer to save my life" shes good at spotting deer. or i posted sumthin about how i can't wait to break out the helmet cam this winter. (the one she bought me) another one was using one of her quotes on how life is too short to be unhappy. but she dosn't know that i know she likes the quote. haha. just sneaky stuff.

 

 

youre doing this wrong. how do you make her jealous? well by moving on and dating other woman, you dont wanna throw this in her face, but just letting her now that there's other girls interested in you. thats how you do it. and since she's with another guy you absolutely dont need to feel bad about it, sure you could fake this to.

 

but it would be even better to actually go on a real date to make "you" feel better. you see, even if your not going to be together with this girl, theres nothing wrong with dating. and if your starting to like this girl, thats great!.

 

i said you dont wanna throw it in her face. if you want to make her jealous, well either youre faking it or not. if your gonna use facebook, do it like this. im out with jennifer, or "at the cinema with jennifer". thats how you make her jealous. because then there's "another" person in your life, and she's not on your mind

[punkinless]

i would go on a few dates with another girl. deff would not fake it. laaaame.

[chados]

i would go on a few dates with another girl. deff would not fake it. laaaame.

 

 

i did send you a link where to download, its taking forever to get it into my email and send it to you:)

[punkinless]

thankyou. i would also enjoy someone elses view on this. not that ur not doing an excellent job. lol

[ChelseaLS]

Okay I read your first post, and started your letter to punkin (which is funny because I used to call my ex punkin butt... lol I like to add the butt part) but I stopped at "I just wasn't being a good boyfriend"... really? You are dropping to her level to make her feel better?

From what you wrote and I am going to trust its honestly how you saw it... you don't have anything to be sorry about.

I am sorry to say, but you were her rebound and probably comfortable because you were someone she knew. This is very "high school" in a lot of ways.. although this kind of thing happens to people way on in age. This girl has a lot of groaning up to do.

As for BOB hanging out with PUNKIN and AHOLE... he is PUNKIN's brother. My brother would be there for me in a second regardless if he approved of who I was with or not. So don't take that personally.

As for FB it's the devil (yes I do have an account), but do yourself a favour and block her or her updates. When you see her in person be polite, don't be awkward, hold your head high say your hellos and move on.

[chados]

Okay I read your first post, and started your letter to punkin (which is funny because I used to call my ex punkin butt... lol I like to add the butt part) but I stopped at "I just wasn't being a good boyfriend"... really? You are dropping to her level to make her feel better?

From what you wrote and I am going to trust its honestly how you saw it... you don't have anything to be sorry about.

I am sorry to say, but you were her rebound and probably comfortable because you were someone she knew. This is very "high school" in a lot of ways.. although this kind of thing happens to people way on in age. This girl has a lot of groaning up to do.

As for BOB hanging out with PUNKIN and AHOLE... he is PUNKIN's brother. My brother would be there for me in a second regardless if he approved of who I was with or not. So don't take that personally.

As for FB it's the devil (yes I do have an account), but do yourself a favour and block her or her updates. When you see her in person be polite, don't be awkward, hold your head high say your hellos and move on.

 

 

 

 

you always make some good points, rebounds in high school, i haven't even thought about that ever in my whole life. pure genius . but i have to say i doubt that her new relationship will last long

[punkinless]

so you think i was the rebound? i thought i avoided that by waiting a month or so and we lasted 16 months. kinda long for a rebound if you ask me . . . but what do i know.

 

our reason for breaking up was something that i had control over but i didn't realize that she was getting ready to leave and it was too late to fix it. idk. i really don't know why i waited but when it happened it hit me like a bombshell. didn't realize how much i loved her until she didn't love me back...

 

i do agree she has some growing up to do. but she IS only a senior in highschool. if she looked at the big picture, or how i see it, the kid thats nice as hell and is on year 2 of his 4 year degree in a promising field? or the kid who trreated me like dirt and is a farmer? haha. but shes young, and happy, thats all you really need in a relationship when ur young . . .

[ChelseaLS]

so you think i was the rebound? i thought i avoided that by waiting a month or so and we lasted 16 months. kinda long for a rebound if you ask me . . . but what do i know.

 

our reason for breaking up was something that i had control over but i didn't realize that she was getting ready to leave and it was too late to fix it. idk. i really don't know why i waited but when it happened it hit me like a bombshell. didn't realize how much i loved her until she didn't love me back...

 

i do agree she has some growing up to do. but she IS only a senior in highschool. if she looked at the big picture, or how i see it, the kid thats nice as hell and is on year 2 of his 4 year degree in a promising field? or the kid who trreated me like dirt and is a farmer? haha. but shes young, and happy, thats all you really need in a relationship when ur young . . .

 

 

You waited a month... I am not sure how anyone could loose all feelings in a month... perhaps I am just old.

 

She is a senior, so thats what 17 or 18? And at 18 you are considered a mature adult?... I realize she is young and I know older people do this kind of thing too... I am still calling it immaturity.

 

As the saying goes.. "you don't know what you have till it's gone". So you have admitted your part in the failing of the relationship, you have to respect her decision and move on.

[punkinless]

i've accepted her decison. i don't respect it. not that it matters. and moving on? well easier said then done. and u are correct on the month thing. now that i think about it it was closer to two months but still a short time. i've decided i'm just gunna hang out and be myself and pretend i have no feelings for her. sense i have to see her all the time in order to remain best friends with bob . . .