MemeMo Posted May 25, 2004 Share Posted May 25, 2004 This happened a couple months ago.. but I have been thinking about it lately.. This is my first love. I lost my virginity to him but he has been with many people before me I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. When we were at 11 months he went out one night without telling me.. he didnt answer his phone and I didnt know where he was. When I got a hold of him he said he had been out with his boy John. I got so mad I told him it was over. I didnt talk to him for the next 2 days.. he only called twice (I didnt answer. So on the third day I decided to go to his house to have a talk with him I was just angry I didnt really want to break up with him. I went to his house and he wasnt home, I called him and told him I was there and wanted to talk. So he said he would be home soon. I went to him room while waiting and listened to some music. I went to throw something away and there was a USED condom in the trash.. I tried to calm down but I couldent. I started to cry. I didnt know what to do.. I really wanted to be with this kid so much. I didnt know what to say.. he walked in and I just balled. I cried and cried. He said "aright I got head (blow-job), but I didnt do anything else with her, thats not mine its Johns". He told me that John came to his house with some ho and they were doin **** in his room, when he walked upstairs John told him to sit down and John had sex with her while my boyfriend got a blow-job from her . He said he made her stop after like 20 seconds and told her he was thinking of his ex. And he told me he couldent even get hard. I know I am stupid for forgiving him, but should I have given him a second chance? This really put a dent in out trust issues. I think he had sex with her but he swears he didnt. I dunno why but I keep thinking about that whenever Im not with him. He goes to another girl 2 days after I broke up with him? Thats gross.. is it normal? That doesent show that he cares too much about us right? Now we are doing great, whenever I think about it he tells me it was the past and he would never do anything like that when he is with me. He says he wasnt thinking and he thought I was never going to call him again. I dont know what to believe, I dont even know this John kid, He says he dont chill with him or talks to him anymore. Any suggestions? Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted May 25, 2004 Share Posted May 25, 2004 Sorry, but I don't get it. Maybe there's more that you're not telling us but I don't understand why you would break up with him because he was out with a mate. Did you guys have previous plans or something? You say he went out without telling you - is he supposed to tell you everything about what he does & where he goes? If so then you had trust issues before the break up. You broke up with him (whether you meant it or not - he can't read your mind) & then he had sex (or whatever) with someone else. Sure it was only 2 days later but when you've ended a relationship with someone you have no control over what & when they do whatever with anyone else. As for forgiving him - what did he need your forgiveness for? You ended it - he was a free man. There are no rules about how long someone has to wait before having sex (or whatever) when their relationship is over. So you think it's gross - that is only what you think. Forget about it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MemeMo Posted May 26, 2004 Author Share Posted May 26, 2004 Originally posted by bluechocolate Sorry, but I don't get it. Maybe there's more that you're not telling us but I don't understand why you would break up with him because he was out with a mate. Did you guys have previous plans or something? You say he went out without telling you - is he supposed to tell you everything about what he does & where he goes? If so then you had trust issues before the break up. You broke up with him (whether you meant it or not - he can't read your mind) & then he had sex (or whatever) with someone else. Sure it was only 2 days later but when you've ended a relationship with someone you have no control over what & when they do whatever with anyone else. As for forgiving him - what did he need your forgiveness for? You ended it - he was a free man. There are no rules about how long someone has to wait before having sex (or whatever) when their relationship is over. So you think it's gross - that is only what you think. Forget about it. Yeah you are right.. I left alot out. I was at his house and he told me he was going to sleep so I would leave. Then his father called me looking for him at like 1.. he didnt answer his phone then he picked up and hung up. I finally called with a restricted number and got a hold of him (when I told him I couldent deal with him). I felt like he lied to me and I couldent trust him.. but I really loved him and didnt knoww hat to do. I wanted to make him feel as bad as I felt when he lied. But thank you for making me realize that I wasnt with him.. I just wanted to see if he would want me back, and try to get back with me. I was just confused. Thanks for the vice. Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted May 27, 2004 Share Posted May 27, 2004 You're welcome. He lied to you & that was wrong, but in the future don't break up with someone as a way of testing them because you never know what will happen, do you? Communicate with him about how hurt you feel - it just might save you both from a lot more heartache then is necessary. Link to post Share on other sites
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