l2hvn Posted May 25, 2004 Share Posted May 25, 2004 i sent my bf of 3 mos. a basket of flowers (coupled w/ assorted coffee beans since he's a coffeeholic) to his work yesterday (monday), thanking him for having a great day before that (sunday). thing is, last weekend, he went out-of-town. he drove back sunday just in time to catch an afternoon baseball game. he bought the tickets anyway since he knew i really wanted to go to the game. he could've said no b/c he'd be really exhausted (not enough sleep, having to wake up extra early and drive back down here for 4hrs.). but he didn't complain or whine. not even for one second. as soon as he got back, he took me to the game. then we went grocery shopping. then he cooked dinner for me (w/c he hadn't done before b/c he hardly cooks). so i really had a great time sunday. so i thought by me sending him flowers is my way of showing my gratitude and appreciation. do you think i went overboard? my friends were split. my gf thinks it was very nice and sweet, and so is my male buddy. but my other gf thinks my bf might get overwhelmed, and that i might actually scare him away. she thinks he should be doing sweet things to me since he's being a bf. and by me sending flowers, it would really make me look like im really into him, that it wouldn't require too much of an effort in his part. he called me yesterday and thanked me for the flowers. he was definitely surprised and he thinks it was very sweet of me to do it. he was very happy. and he even told me that it definitely made his day b/c he was having a horrible day yesterday. i want to know what you guys think.... did i go overboard? do you think i might actually scare him away? some guys would rather do those things to a girl (and not vice-versa), so it might weird them out. Link to post Share on other sites
uriel Posted May 25, 2004 Share Posted May 25, 2004 Oh, I think it's fine. He indicated that by calling you to thank you. Just don't couple it with any more big displays or emotional outpourings for awhile. Keep things light but sweet. Obviously, you felt like he'd be receptive to this, or you wouldn't have done it. Don't worry! A guy who was bothered by this would have avoided talking about it until he was forced by your making contact. -- uriel Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted May 25, 2004 Share Posted May 25, 2004 Hey, I'm a bloke & I like flowers & I also like coffee ! I think it was a very nice gesture to thank him like that. Obviously he did too or he wouldn't have told you it made his day. He would have just said thanks & left it at that. A woman (just a friend) once sent me some to thank her for helping her with a job application. Again, it's a nice thing to do. Link to post Share on other sites
CurlyIam Posted May 25, 2004 Share Posted May 25, 2004 No way, you were great! Spontanious, thoughtful, sincere, not afraid to show him you appreciated him... I mean think of his workmates... they'd die right this minute to go out with you ! As far as from a girl's point of vue, you're in the relationship. Your oppinion and it alone matters most! You felt it would be appropriate? You felt it was the right timing? Great! It is true that girls are the one to be spoiled, but that doens't mean that boys shouldn't be spoilled at all. Thanks for the thought, by the way! Link to post Share on other sites
Pyrannaste Posted May 25, 2004 Share Posted May 25, 2004 Some guys would be scared away by it (I once happened to date a guy who dumped me because I sent him a dozen roses at home), some would be pissed off, some would be perplexed. Yet, again, other guys would be delighted and happy. Since his reaction was this he called me yesterday and thanked me for the flowers. he was definitely surprised and he thinks it was very sweet of me to do it. he was very happy. and he even told me that it definitely made his day b/c he was having a horrible day yesterday. , what your friends (or any other guy receiving flowers) does not really matter. Link to post Share on other sites
wideawake Posted May 25, 2004 Share Posted May 25, 2004 Sounds like he is a pretty cool and well-adjusted guy. I would think that any guy that has problems getting flowers from a girl has some security issues, or maybe just really doesn't like flowers (but hey, who doesn't like flowers?) My girl sent flowers to me at work with a really nice vase and a romantic note and it just blew me away. I loved it, and made sure she knew it. Flowers rock. Having a woman that can shower her man with love and attention is all good in my book. Keep those flowers rolling. (candy, steaks, and high end hydro are all good choices as well...) Link to post Share on other sites
RackEmUp Posted May 25, 2004 Share Posted May 25, 2004 he was definitely surprised and he thinks it was very sweet of me to do it. he was very happy. and he even told me that it definitely made his day So, it was a good thing. He is nice to you and you show your appreciation. she thinks he should be doing sweet things to me [without any thanks or appreciation from me] since he's being a bf. and by me sending flowers, it would really make me look like im really into him, that it wouldn't require too much of an effort in his part. Hunnhhhh???? I'm guessing that this gf may not have had the best romantic history herself, if she has this rather odd idea of entitlement. It is CARING and GOOD to show your appreciation to your loved one. Perhaps she is confusing this situation with, say, an early, uncommitted dating affair, where it is true that you don't want to be falling all over someone or buying him a big screen HDTV after the second date. But "thank you"s and small, tasteful gifts, chosen with the recipient's own preferences in mind, are ALWAYS appropriate. Link to post Share on other sites
Author l2hvn Posted May 25, 2004 Author Share Posted May 25, 2004 thank you all so much for the replies. it definitely eased my mind. i just wanted to get a different perspective. i am so happy and so in-love w/ this guy, he doesn't even know. but i am not the type who's all clingy.. just enough affection for him to know that i really like him. again, thank you all so much. Link to post Share on other sites
Neo Posted May 25, 2004 Share Posted May 25, 2004 Man if a girl did that for me I'd love it... don't do it too often though, but sounds like you made a good move Link to post Share on other sites
Fritz Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 Originally posted by l2hvn but my other gf thinks my bf might get overwhelmed, and that i might actually scare him away. she thinks he should be doing sweet things to me since he's being a bf. and by me sending flowers, it would really make me look like im really into him, that it wouldn't require too much of an effort in his part. I too am guessing she doesn't have the best romantic life. Women who require me to do all the "a courtin" work with no appreciation (such as flowers or small gifts) don't last long with me. Its not like this was a first date or something. Link to post Share on other sites
WarningSign Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 Hmm, I don't understand this flowers thing! If I was a guy, I would be a little weirded out by that. But that's besides the point (Don't worry, it's not even weird to other people. I am just a strange person). You need to stop fretting! What you did was sweet --- plain and simple. And he called you to let you know how much he loved it and how much it made his day. What is there to worry about? He sounds like a really great guy. You snagged a good one! P.S. The only thing that would be a little too much would be if you bought him a new car or something big like that. But, then again, I don't think he would complain. Link to post Share on other sites
Author l2hvn Posted May 26, 2004 Author Share Posted May 26, 2004 oh , you guys have been so supportive. thanks a bunch! that gf of mine who said it wasn't a good idea to send flowers, well, she doesn't have a boyfriend (and hasn't had one in a long time). she still abides by "the rules." so her comments make a lot of sense now.. Link to post Share on other sites
Pyrannaste Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 she still abides by "the rules." I bought a copy of that book some time ago, I was too curious about it. I'm glad I did because I love the idea of breaking a dozen rules a day. If I were a man, honestly, I'd run like hell from ladies who have a copy of that book at home. <realizes what she has just written> <makes note to herself to hide that book better> Link to post Share on other sites
CurlyIam Posted May 27, 2004 Share Posted May 27, 2004 What kind of a book? One with hints one "how to remain single till the death of you"? Kiddin'!! C'mon, please share, I want to have fun too!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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