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Is he not over it??


ditzchic

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I met this guy in the beginning of May. We had a great connection at first, tons of chemistry, always had a good time together and amazing sex. Things fizzled out pretty quickly. I felt we were moving too fast and he felt we weren't moving fast enough. We had a ton in common, had very similar senses of humor everything was great except for our dating styles. Tension arose very quickly. The chemistry and the passion fizzled. He ended up dumping me at the end of July. He said he didn't think we were compatible, that he always felt alone with me but that he still had feelings for me and he would miss me a lot. I accepted that because I felt it too. He asked if we could stay friends and asked me to come see a movie with him the next day. I told him that I definitely couldn't see the movie with him, that I needed time to process what just happened. And I wasn't sure about staying friends in the long run because I always find friendships with exes to be awkward and if he's not the one, I'd rather have my life uncomplicated by exes when "the one" saunters in. We said our goodbyes and that was that.

 

The next day I sent him an e-mail asking if he thought we could hang out that upcoming weekend because I thought about it and I didn't want to lose him; that if he needed me to open up and move bit faster that I would try. He replied only with a "Not right now. Not yet." I told him the ball was in his court but I would like to try. Contact me when he felt the need.

 

He never officially contacted me but a couple months later he started needlessly posting things on my facebook page. The first couple times he did it I tried to respond and get some kind of dialogue going. He never bit. The next few times he did it, I didn't respond at all. The last time he did it, I unfriended him. I mean, I'm over him. I understand we aren't together. I understand why it didn't work. I would love to give it another shot in the future but I'm cool with what's going on now. I care for him but neither of us are in the right place to be with the other. If one day we end up in each other's path again, great. If not, well it wasn't meant to be and we are both great people who will end up happy in the end. But seeing him commenting on my facebook, seeing his face on my profile, seeing his name pop up on my phone alerting me, it upset me. So I had to delete him.

 

I signed up for an online dating site. Apparently, so did he. He consistently showed up as my top match. I saw his picture everywhere around the site. I never clicked his profile or sent him a message, I would just glaze over his picture and continue about my business. Well I guess he saw me on the same dating site and he "hid" my profile. That means he can't see me anymore on the site and I can't see him.

 

My question is, why would he hide me? It's not like I'm trying to contact him or stalk him. I can't see nor do I want to see his personal business. I unfriended him from fb because it felt like he was injecting himself into my life but not giving me anything in return. I did nothing like that to him on the dating site. Do you think he did that because clearly he isn't over me? Or could it possibly be that he just really effing hates me and can't stand to see my face. But if he hated me what was with the fb stuff?? Uhh!! please shed some insight on this...

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SincereOnlineGuy

Males have zero interest in being your "friend" when their true motive isn't that of getting into your pants.

 

 

Being mean/irritating to you puts him nearer to you than does being completely out of your circles (or ignored).

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Males have zero interest in being your "friend" when their true motive isn't that of getting into your pants.

 

You are the biggest male basher I've ever seen. This isn't the first post I have seen on this subject. Just because you do not have any female friends that you dont want to get into their pants doesnt mean that other guys dont have female friends with the objective of just being friends.

 

There are some of us that respect women and value their friendships and the networking opportunities that having female friends provides us with.

 

Grow up and get out from behind your computer.

 

As for this topic, just let it go. Theres nothing you can do. Pretend he was a driver that cut you off on the road home from work. Complain about it, get it out of your system and dont let it affect the rest of your day/life

Edited by wilsonx
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I just wanted to give you a thumbs up because you know "a lot" is two words. Let's get married.

 

Ok. But I'm gonna need you to use some real big words in the formal proposal. Which I expect be done in front of my friends and family. :)

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Ok. But I'm gonna need you to use some real big words in the formal proposal. Which I expect be done in front of my friends and family. :)

 

Whoa, whoa, whoa. I merely suggested our union, I didn't mean now. You're moving a little fast for me, I might have to rethink this.

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Whoa, whoa, whoa. I merely suggested our union, I didn't mean now. You're moving a little fast for me, I might have to rethink this.

 

Damn it!!! I just can't ever seem to get the speed right in these things!!!

:p

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