Why some women are not wife material

[musemaj11]

u

 

 

So sad to realise some men (& this just one example picked at random) are so cynical about women's reasons for aspiring to marry.

 

In fact research shows strongly that married men enjoy greater wealth, health & happiness than unmarried men. The same goes for married as opposed to unmarried women however the health & happiness benefits of marriage are greater for men than women.

A happy long term relationship surely provides health and emotional benefits. But you dont have to be married in order to experience a happy long term relationship.

 

I wouldn't go near a man who thought that marriage was all about women trying to fleece men of money.

Too bad you cant read minds.

 

As for finding a younger woman who financially equal that is unlikely. Wealth is built over time & younger women have had less time to aquire it because they are still paying off educational expenses or bearing to helping to bear the costs of raising children which are part of a younger woman's life.

For example if the guy is in his 40s, he should marry a woman in her late 20s or early 30s who is financially at least not too far behind.

 

PS Career women can smell a man who is dating them for their assets, earning capacity & financial status a mile away. I can anyway & got rid of one ex-boyfriend a while back for exactly that reason

Actually I do notice that.

 

I notice that women tend to be a lot more afraid of getting financially taken advantage of than men. Very ironic.

 

Its like a liar who is always paranoid of getting lied to if you know what I mean.

 

I laugh whenever I hear men complaining marriage is so terrible, it's all about money, etc. After a divorce, it's the men who remarry at a higher rate than women. All the divorced men I know have remarried, but few of the women have. The women say they've had their fill of cooking and cleaning for someone else who tries to control them and they enjoy being single. Single men complain that middle-aged women just want to play the field, while the divorced and widowed men want a close, long term relationship. Divorced and widowed men die earlier than women in the same situation. Clearly the men get something special out of being married. Men who've never been married don't know what they are talking about because they've never experienced it.

The reason divorced men are more likely to remarry than divorced women is actually a lot simpler than what you try to make us believe.

 

When a woman is divorced at 40, chances are (not always) she is a fat and old woman with one or more dependent kids from the marriage. Not attractive to most men.

 

On the other hand, a divorced man at 40 may not be good looking either, but he is likely to be financially established and mature. Two attributes that are most attractive to women.

 

Also many men especially of the older generation were so brainwashed about the idea of the perfect marriage such as what their parents had that even after having failed marriages one after another, they keep on trying to find that fantasy.

 

However, according to my observation, the newer generation of men tend to give up on marriage after one try or do not even believe in marriage altogether.

[rainy day woman]

I married my husband after about two years of dating. We knew from the beginning that we would probably get married but we also were not in a hurry. We did live together for about six months prior to marrying, not because we wanted a trial run but because of convenience. For the first year and half we lived two hours away from one another and wanted to spend more time together. We've been happily married for eight years. (I have issues with friendship and loneliness since I recently stopped working to take care of our kids so I just joined this board, but my marriage, while not perfect, is not troubled.) I think two years is enough time. I think there's a general perception that women want to get married and men don't but if a guy is crazy about you he'll pursue you, and if marriage is something he values, wants, and has always imagined for himself he'll also want to marry you.

 

Although I am for marriage on both a personal level and for the betterment of society (because studies have shown children of married couples fare better) I think musemaj11 makes some valid points and if someone doesn't see the point in marriage or is cynical about its results clearly it isn't for them. I also think it's ok for men to take advantage of their longer reproductive life and marry later. My husband and I were both 27 when we married but my father was a bachelor until he was 34 (my mom was eight years younger)... I think it can be fulfilling when someone leads a full life and then marries.

[LilMissMovinOn]

A happy long term relationship surely provides health and emotional benefits. But you dont have to be married in order to experience a happy long term relationship.

 

LMMO: No-one said marriage was needed to exp a happy LT r.ship. I had one. Unmarried. Very happy. He died. End of story. What I referred to what the stats suggest re married vs not married males, married vs not married females & married males vs married women. You're welcome to undertake yr own reseach comparing whatever groups you like. lol

 

 

Too bad you cant read minds.

 

LMMO: One does not need to read minds. Reading behaviour is a reliable indicator of the gist of what people are thinking.

 

For example if the guy is in his 40s, he should marry a woman in her late 20s or early 30s who is financially at least not too far behind.

 

 

Actually I do notice that.

 

I notice that women tend to be a lot more afraid of getting financially taken advantage of than men. Very ironic.

 

Its like a liar who is always paranoid of getting lied to if you know what I mean.

 

Wow. You sound very bitter. I feel sorry for you. I have no worries about being taken for a ride financially by a man b.cuz having worked extremely hard for ever penny, I value my financial independence & wouldnt let any man jepardise that in a pink fit. Wot I also wont do is be with a man who lives at home with Mum in his middle age, has few assets & no savings, who intends to keep living with Mum as the only heir to the parental home (father deceased) until she dies, leaving him the house & whom wants to be with me only because he thinks he doesnt need to provide for me in any way shape or form.

 

 

The reason divorced men are more likely to remarry than divorced women is actually a lot simpler than what you try to make us believe.

 

When a woman is divorced at 40, chances are (not always) she is a fat and old woman with one or more dependent kids from the marriage. Not attractive to most men.

 

On the other hand, a divorced man at 40 may not be good looking either, but he is likely to be financially established and mature. Two attributes that are most attractive to women.

 

This is rubbish. If he has children frm the first marriage he will have a large proportion of his income payable in child support & alimony etc (& rightfully so as the woman sacrificed her career & earning capacity to have & raise his children!)

 

Also many men especially of the older generation were so brainwashed about the idea of the perfect marriage such as what their parents had that even after having failed marriages one after another, they keep on trying to find that fantasy.

 

I don't think men seek further marriages because they are chasing a fantasy. The fantasy notion was hung out to dry out with failed M number one. Men benefit greatly on all levels from being married (in good marriages at least) & they know it, end of story.

 

However, according to my observation, the newer generation of men tend to give up on marriage after one try or do not even believe in marriage altogether.

 

Again, generally speaking, Gen Y are actually marrying younger than Gen X. I'm not sure why but one hypothesis is that it's linked to (of all things) the state of economy. Which brings us back to the issue of money. Not going there again. Nuff said.

[Horseshoe]

My husband proposed to me after 6 months. We had planned to marry in a year, but when we found out my father was dying, we surprised my family by getting married at the hospital so my dad could walk me down the isle. Our first anniversary will be this january. We are both in our mid thirties and could have married other people several times. I'd actually turned down an Ex who proposed a few years before. When you know, you know; you know?