majomparade Posted November 24, 2011 Share Posted November 24, 2011 Seems like I picked a real winner here. It's been a while since I have been here, but I've been focusing on other things. One of them has been trying to meet a girl via these online dating sites. I'm officially down to only paying for 1 site and only using 1 site for free. That being said... I was talking to this girl from the free online dating site. We were exchanging e-mails back and forward and out of the clear blue sky, she asked me if I wanted to go bowling (it was a Sunday, I had no other plans). I told her it sounded great, asked her when and where. She said "now.." and gave me a place close to her house, about 30 minutes away from me. So, I said I was up for it, told her I was leaving, she said she was looking forward to meeting me. About halfway there, I get a text message from her. "Hey, I'm sorry, can we do this tomorrow instead?" Needless to say, I was a bit ticked off about this. Here I am, driving out of my way, we had definite plans and she cancels on me? Yikes! Bad move. Keep in mind, I never talked to her on the phone yet. So I told her no, I couldn't go tomorrow, I was busy, but asked if she could do it Tuesday instead. She said sure. Ok, so we were set for Tuesday. So, she decided she wanted to talk to me Monday and boy oh boy did this conversation go bad. She went on and on about how she would know from the moment she met me that she would want to be with me, she had enough friends and didn't need another friend, how if I dressed a certain way (say in khaki's and a nice shirt) she wouldn't want to be seen with me, etc. Yikes! On top of this, twice, she decided to cut conversations short and told me she would call me back in the middle of our conversations. I felt it was rude of her. I eventually didn't pick up when she called later that night. I was getting a bad vibe from this one already and was feeling stressed with her. After all, I was "busy" anyway Monday night, or so I told her. So I wasn't making myself readily available. Well, she didn't seem to get this and was texting me things like "Guess you don't want to talk to me". I got back to her Tuesday morning saying something along the lines of "Sorry I missed your call, I was busy doing something with my dad" (actually, I was with my dad that night soo...). She just responded with a "K". Needless to say, I just wasn't feeling it with this girl. Rather than continue to pursue, I decided I needed some more time with things. Maybe a few days for her to calm down. Later in the day, I did lie to her, told her I had to cancel tonight because I went home sick from work and I wasn't feeling too well. I got no response. Hey, at least I didn't cancel on her when she was halfway to the bowling alley!!! (Though the thought crossed my mind) So, the next day out of the clear blue sky (this past Wednesday) she sends me a text message. It wasn't asking how I was feeling, instead it said something along the lines of "I don't think you care if you meet me". Ok, that was uncalled for. I ignored it, obviously someone this unstable has issues. Then on Thursday I get another text "Why did you waste my time?". Then Friday morning "You are an a-hole!" Just waiting for this random one today haha. I haven't responded to her yet. Based upon her actions, can you guys say that what I did was right? Meaning cancelling on her like that to give a few days to see how she would react? I hate playing games like that, but now that I can see the type of person she is, I want to have nothing to do with her. On a side note, I've been talking to another girl closer to home. She's pretty nice so far.. haven't met, will probably end up meeting her next week. Link to post Share on other sites
wildgeese Posted November 24, 2011 Share Posted November 24, 2011 While she may not be the pick of the litter, you should have been upfront with her. Even a simple, cliche "I think we should just stick with being friends" is better than ignoring her. I also just realized that this really has nothing to do with long distance relationships? You may ask the "Dating" board for more advice as opposed to this one. Link to post Share on other sites
Omei Posted November 24, 2011 Share Posted November 24, 2011 you have already made up your mind about this girl, tbh no matter how crazy she was I find it weird you come on here to this story, if you're not looking for advice. Tell a friend. Link to post Share on other sites
wild_urge Posted November 24, 2011 Share Posted November 24, 2011 I think you did the right thing, but you posted in the wrong forum Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted November 24, 2011 Share Posted November 24, 2011 One suggestion I will make is to call instead of text as soon as possible. You'll get a better vibe for how well you feel about the person from voice contact and so save yourself time and effort dealing with weird texts. Otherwise, not responding to someone blowing hot and cold so early on and trying to lay on the emotional blackmail is a good call. Link to post Share on other sites
wild_urge Posted November 24, 2011 Share Posted November 24, 2011 One suggestion I will make is to call instead of text as soon as possible. You'll get a better vibe for how well you feel about the person from voice contact and so save yourself time and effort dealing with weird texts. Otherwise, not responding to someone blowing hot and cold so early on and trying to lay on the emotional blackmail is a good call. But they did talk on the phone ! Link to post Share on other sites
SunsetRed Posted November 24, 2011 Share Posted November 24, 2011 She does sound crazy. What free site did you use? Was it Plenty of Fish? I found plenty of unemployed, unstable men on that site. Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted November 24, 2011 Share Posted November 24, 2011 But they did talk on the phone ! On Monday. They were going bowling at the weekend and had not spoken on the phone at all, even after she cancelled, by text. Link to post Share on other sites
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