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Caught dumper ex gf staring at me. Why?


YouNeverKnow86

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YouNeverKnow86

So last night I saw my dumper ex girlfriend at a bar and I caught her staring at me about 5 different times. A few times she saw me talking with other girls. The stare was blank/sort of sad looking. She dumped me and we haven't spoken in almost 2 months. What would your take be on this? Has this happened to anyone else?

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I think in general, it's wise not to look too much into these things, as there could be many reasons why she was looking at you like that. And even if she was looking at you for a reason, liked you said, she was the dumper... so it would again have to be her choice to initiate things with you if she is feeling regret for what happened. I'm not trying to "rain on your parade" here, I just really don't want you to look into things or worry yourself over something that ultimately may not happen or might not be true...

 

There are also different "kinds" of sad. It could be that, yes, the way she was looking at you was because she was sad that she dumped you. But it could also be another kind of sadness, the kind that acknowledges the fact that she ended things, and even though it might've been the right thing to do, it's still sad that two people who once cared a lot for each other had to go their separate ways.

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YouNeverKnow86
I think in general, it's wise not to look too much into these things, as there could be many reasons why she was looking at you like that. And even if she was looking at you for a reason, liked you said, she was the dumper... so it would again have to be her choice to initiate things with you if she is feeling regret for what happened. I'm not trying to "rain on your parade" here, I just really don't want you to look into things or worry yourself over something that ultimately may not happen or might not be true...

 

There are also different "kinds" of sad. It could be that, yes, the way she was looking at you was because she was sad that she dumped you. But it could also be another kind of sadness, the kind that acknowledges the fact that she ended things, and even though it might've been the right thing to do, it's still sad that two people who once cared a lot for each other had to go their separate ways.

 

Thieves,

 

I totally agree with you. The same thing happened about a month ago; it is just funny because it seems like she is literally looking around to see where I am. The place is very crowded too but we made eye contact on and off. Such a weird feeling though catching her staring at me, when just 4 months ago we would be doing the same thing but in each others arms.

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Thieves,

 

I totally agree with you. The same thing happened about a month ago; it is just funny because it seems like she is literally looking around to see where I am. The place is very crowded too but we made eye contact on and off. Such a weird feeling though catching her staring at me, when just 4 months ago we would be doing the same thing but in each others arms.

 

Did you acknowledge her like a wave or a smile?

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Did you acknowledge her like a wave or a smile?

 

Simon,

 

I did not but I was smiling because I was having a good time. The reason I did not acknowledge her was due to the fact about 2 months ago she told me to no longer contact her. She also became cold/distant during this time frame (ignoring me, it was awful). I feel that it shouldn't be up to me to acknowledge her considering the fact she broke up with me and no longer wanted contact with me 2 months post breakup. She knows how I feel about her, so if she wants to make the move than it is up to her. I treated her too well and was too nice to her during the relationship and post breakup.

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Simon,

 

I did not but I was smiling because I was having a good time. The reason I did not acknowledge her was due to the fact about 2 months ago she told me to no longer contact her. She also became cold/distant during this time frame (ignoring me, it was awful). I feel that it shouldn't be up to me to acknowledge her considering the fact she broke up with me and no longer wanted contact with me 2 months post breakup. She knows how I feel about her, so if she wants to make the move than it is up to her. I treated her too well and was too nice to her during the relationship and post breakup.

 

You are on the right track! Let her contact you if she wants to. Meanwhile get a move on with your life. Move away from your normal routines with her and you will feel much better. I did that more than 15 years ago and looking back, I was glad my ex GF broke up with me because I became more mature, independent and move up in my career. I would say blessing in disguise. ;)

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