So Low

[fenderjames]

Woke up today at 4am . I havent stopped crying since . It feels so fresh again . I havent seen her in over 3 months or heard her voice in the same amount of time . I dont know whats going on . All I know is I cant stop crying today . I went for a walk, then for a drive in the countryside hoping it would change my mood . No such luck . I feel like a total loser . Lame, weak and lost . My god when will this stop . I dont want to miss you anymore . I dont want to wonder what your doing . I want the indifference that you have . I cant seem to find it . Here come the tears again .

[karmaqueen]

Some days are just awful, especially when you start off badly. I get these days too. Really hope that today is better. Look after yourself as if you have the flu - don't take on too much, try to sleep and eat well and reassure yourself that its part of the break up process.

[fenderjames]

Ty karma . So kind . All the best to u . Cheers, fj.

[LostJustLost]

God what I wouldnt give to have an answer to this, I thought I was walking down a path to healing too and yesterday it all came rushing back. Hit me like a freight train, every where I looked, every thought I had brought him back into my mind, it felt like my chest was going to explode and I would be a casualty of a broken heart. To be honest there was a few moments that I hate to admit that I wanted it to, even considered helping it along.

 

I am so sorry that it's not just me who's feeling these things. It isnt fair, those of us left behind without a second glance have no where to go with the confusion, the pain, the unanswered questions.. I hope somehow you find a bit of peace today fj, and know that you are not alone.

 

I will also be following karmaqueen's advice if I can. ~L