StewT Posted November 26, 2011 Share Posted November 26, 2011 Hi guys, this post isn't actually for me but for a close friend of mine. As you may be aware I have my own relationship Issues at the moment which im trying to make the right decisions on, but that is another story. My best friend has been single for a very long time, he is coming up to the age of 25 and has never been in a relationship(that has lasted more then a month). I'm worried for him because he has no self esteem or confidence. He tells me that he wants to go out to meet girls and find someone special. He is only a small guy and only realistically wants to date girls that are of same height or smaller(which i think is absurd). The problem is, he cannot initiate a conversation with a girl, its like he's scared of them, but having never been in a true relationship there is nothing to be scared of? Im taking him to Amsterdam this weekend to help with his love life and confidence, but really i don't know what i can say or do to help him, it makes me feel bad knowing that he could be spending his time trying to make the effort and build up confidence but its hard for me to even try and motivate him to do it. Some thoughts on what i can say, and the benefits being a relationship may help but obviously i've tried telling him such positives a thousand times before, so any help would be great. thx for ur time Link to post Share on other sites
cerridwen Posted November 26, 2011 Share Posted November 26, 2011 Sounds like all you can do, has been done. Providing a listening ear, encouragement, and outings, are things often suggested. Also suggested: Be a good wingman. Talk him up to the girls in the midst of having fun, but don't overdo it lest it add to his uneasiness. The rest must come from him. He'll blossom at his own speed so manage your expectations and frustrations and let him develop at his own pace. Enjoy Amsterdam. Link to post Share on other sites
DonJuanInc Posted November 29, 2011 Share Posted November 29, 2011 Your friend has to want help on his own. Being a short guy and only wanting short girls is common, I'm 5'6" and have never really dated taller girls not because I can't get them, but because I don't really feel manly when a woman is bigger than me. Sexual chemistry can be affected as well, as most girls will admit it's tough to maintain sexual attraction with a man who makes them feel like an amazon. What he has is often called approach anxiety, and it's universal although it varies in severity. He needs someone to give him a push and get things going. Where abouts in the world are you guys located? Link to post Share on other sites
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