dusty5128 Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 I've got a situation on my hands. I've been dating my girlfriend for about 4 years now. We're ready to get married and both are looking foward to spending our lives together. I just graduated from college with an engineering degree and I am searching for a job. She will graduate next spring with a nursing degree. We both want a decent sized wedding that we will end up paying for. Only one problem, her parents are driving her nuts!!! They are completely unfair to her, they treat her and her siblings terribly. They are very hard on her emotionally, and my girlfriend is very unhappy at home and really wants to get away. She spends many times that we are together upset and many times crying from something that is going on at home. Outside help has been tried and the mother thinks that the problem is not hers, but her children's. She is retired, doesn't do any work, including house work, she sleeps all day, smokes 24/7, and yells when stuff isn't done. I mean honestly the wicked mom from a bad story, I swear. Well, it comes into effect that she really wants to move out, all my guy friends that have girl friends are married/getting married, and all her girlfriends are married or live too far away. She NEEDS TO MOVE OUT, but can't afford it on her own. I really want to move in with her and split the cost, but I am scared of the statistics that are thown in my face when I talk to people about it. What can I do???? I really need help with this one. I love her a lot and don't want to ruin this. Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 I really want to move in with her and split the cost, but I am scared of the statistics that are thown in my face when I talk to people about it. What statistics? Millions of couples live together. Millions of them never get married. And millions of them do. If home is so horrible for her & you're planning to get married then why not live together? Give her an engagement ring & set the wedding date. That way there's no squirming out of it (if that is what you're afraid of). If you can't live together successfully before marriage what on earth makes you think you can after marriage? Link to post Share on other sites
CurlyIam Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 Living together before the marriage is a real trial! IT is really important you do it! Really really important! Even better if she can get away from psycho mom! Link to post Share on other sites
Papillon Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 I'm with bluechoc on this - You're planning to get married, so you're gonna move in together eventually, anyway. You could always have different bedrooms, if that's an issue. Personally, I'd get married now, in court, and move in together - you could always have a nice reaffirmation of vows ceremony later on when you can both afford it. Obviously, it's not ideal and perhaps unromantic, but it doesn't sound like she's in an ideal situation now, anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
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