tegteg Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 Ask my FIRST love if she would like to start dating again? Ok heres the lil story..... Me and her met when i 19 she was 15.... I thought wow at first and was like nope shes too young for now ill see what happens in a couple yrs... Well i seen her all the time after i met her (she is Best friends with my lil bro) and so i watched her and her actions and fig. out that she liked me and likes me ALOT... But she was to young IMO at the time... Well couple yrs go by, and shes 17 im 21 and we get together one nite after swimming together for a week at our frinds house one nite... She came onto me and we had a WONDERFUL nite talkin, talkin and then the joyess moment the kiss I was all Mide you i have bottled up tons of feelings for the girl for 2yrs... Why? Cause i knew we clicked well and everything bout us works and works good... But a couple months later after we had started dating she says she just wants to be friends??? WTF? Ok now i know that everything was going well as far as i knew, apparently i was wrong. I ask her why? and she said i dont know, somthing just tells me to just be friends... But none the less we stoped seeing each other and i had to get away for a while soo i could put myself in check, and i did... But now its been a yr and ive been seeing her around more and more and shes been wanting to race my car with me and my bro. BUT she is starting to look at me like she did befor when we were together??? And feelings are not keeping bottled in and its a hurtin........ Soo i ask you all this, especially the women! How should i go about this?....... Its been a lil over a yr and soo yes? no? maybe? What??? *Gets on knees and begs for options* BTW im one PICKY guy and i know what i want and dont settle for 2nd best...... And As i sit her writing this Joe Diffie- A Nite to remember come on Hmmmm??..... I have been on this site for a while now just reading and reading.... Lots of good info soo i reg. Any help would be GREATLY appreciated! TIA DG Link to post Share on other sites
Papillon Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 Any particular reason she just wants to be friends? Talk to her about it, but whatever you do, don't disrespect her feelings. Tell HER that you refuse to settle for second best... Link to post Share on other sites
CurlyIam Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 Sorry, teg, it's all up to her. Why don't you try to be the player for once? Like let her wonder? Nothing girls like more than guys with lots of choices. so be nice to her, but let her see you with lots of othe girls... or something like that. Maybe she'll come to you! Something to do with moths and fire, I guess ! Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 once bitten, twice shy.. have another go if that is what you really want to do & if she pulls back again, bye-bye baby if it were me I wouldn't go there again, you dated for a couple of months & a year later you think she's flirting with you once more sure she can change her mind I suppose, but she must know how you feel about her & personally I wouldn't like having my feelings played with like this Link to post Share on other sites
Author tegteg Posted May 26, 2004 Author Share Posted May 26, 2004 Nope no idea why... But i have my thoughts on certin things like her younger sis's liking and wanting to be with me also (maybe a some things are being wisperd in her ear at nite from them like lies?) And also that she may not know what she really wants??? And a couple opther things but thats another looong story..... I would never do anything to deistrepect any woman in anyway... Unless jokingly.... I like that thats pretty good ill remember that... But i asked her a couple times why? and she gives the same answer.... The reason i ask this now is because she invited me to her graduation and graduation party at her house soo ill be round her and her family along with our friends... And i know im goin to want to talk to her and be around her and what not.... ***Should i just as her, Would there be a chance on goin out and dating again? How to word it??? I usally dont ahve any prob. with women and this sorts of things, but her man i dun know... hahaha i just soooo confused.... *hits self in head* Im goin to write more poems bout this...... Sigh............ TIA DG Link to post Share on other sites
Author tegteg Posted May 26, 2004 Author Share Posted May 26, 2004 CurlyIam: Well i cant be a player cause well i just suck at that "type" and thats what a couple of my friedns said to do, but i also dont know many a women cause all i do is work and race cars.... Not many round and she loves cars... But FAAAACK its soooo irritating ya know? Owell..... Im being nice to her and just keeping the "freidns" base there.... O and any advise on how to ask the few of my women freidns to hang out when shes around? And should i take a women frind with me to the graduation...????? bluechocolate: I dont really care being bittin just cause i have a REALLY DIFF. way of thinkin and and puttin things into sence... But sometime i do get a lil off track haha..... But anyways i am not affraid to ask her and get shot down... Things like this helps me learn things in life and use them on a daily base's and help others at the sdame time.... Its kinda funny, that all my frinds come to me for advise bout relationships, women, guys, life ETC, but yet i cant even fig out what i need to do in the this situation.... Geuss im Stooopid........ L8R DG Link to post Share on other sites
CurlyIam Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 No way, if you're not the type of guy to have female friends, it'll be obvious you're trying to pull something. I mean just be true to yourself. And you are not STUPID!!!! She invited you to her graduation party at her house. IT's her momen of glory, don't bring a girl with you. Just be nice and supportive and mix in the crowd. Don't be calling for all her attention, this is a moment to share with very special friends, so she'll most probably want you to be there for her during this special time, but also talk to everyone else, like really celebrate the moment... About telling her... I don't know.Actions speak louder than words. Be very attentive at how she acts around you and then wait for the right moment. Asking her to her face... could work. I'm a romantic, to tell you the truth.I'd love you to play a bit the mysterious type. Like not to whisper a word about dating, but be near her when she needs you, talk to her if she feels like it, really taking her easy, like letting her choose what to do when to do it. Some relationships are harder to categorize, you know? But when you feel that the barrier of friendship has definetely been left behind, if in the proper setting and right moment, you could kiss her. What better way for her to answer? Again, you do exactly what you feel appropiate! If this is not your style, don't even consider it!!! If what you want is no "mystery" and just know where you're standing, after the graduation party, you can take her out and have a cup of coffee - your treat for her graduating and then smoothly ask her what's going on, if you've read the right signs and everything!!! Just be yourself, that's all that matters! I really like the fact that you're not afraid of getting "no" for an answer! That's mighty courageous, if I may say so!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author tegteg Posted May 26, 2004 Author Share Posted May 26, 2004 Curly: No not tryin to pull anything, i just dont know a whole lot of women... I can count on 1 hand how many i know (well that are single) 1 i dont got out to bars or clubs 2 im very happy with who i am and what i do, and 3 women just dont "flock" to me like most my other friends.. Which is fine by me... I dont really go out lookin for women either so i fig that if i see and or meet one that is up to "my standards" ill strike up a convo... But really dont know a whole lot of em... I suck i guesss hahaha.... Ok got it on the Grad thing... I just was wondering.... was not sure... ya know im a guy....... Ya i know what your sayin bout catagorizing..... And TY i am not afriad of being turned down by anyone for any reason, wether it be im not "hot" enough or may it be that im not rich enough or that im not just there type or what ever i dont care... Cause when it comes down to it, its not goin to be any worse then had i not asked.... If i get shot down i just hope to land in the water insted of the ground cause i would rather have a watery grave the one that keeps gettin ran over hehehe Any other opinons??? I like all this info keep it coming TY sooo much! TIA DG Link to post Share on other sites
confused&inneed Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 I say do not bring someone to her graduation party, be there for her and only her. Ask her to go racing with you it would be a good way to get her alone and talk about feelings like: why she wants to be friends again, if she wants to date again, stuff like that. Be subtle about it, don't pounce on her like a predator. then tell her how you feel discreetly. So that it invokes those thoughts into her mind if she was not already thinking them. Don't totally through your feeling out there, it could make her back off if she is not feeling the same way as you. But it is a good plan to let her know that you will not go for these than the best. Link to post Share on other sites
faux Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 Originally posted by tegteg Ask my FIRST love if she would like to start dating again? Ok heres the lil story..... Me and her met when i 19 she was 15.... I thought wow at first and was like nope shes too young for now ill see what happens in a couple yrs... Good, because that would be VERY illegal if you did not wait. However, it seems to me not such a great thing that you went "Wow" over a 15 year old at age 19. Well i seen her all the time after i met her (she is Best friends with my lil bro) and so i watched her and her actions and fig. out that she liked me and likes me ALOT... But she was to young IMO at the time... Well couple yrs go by, and shes 17 im 21 and we get together one nite after swimming together for a week at our frinds house one nite... She came onto me and we had a WONDERFUL nite talkin, talkin and then the joyess moment the kiss I was all Mide you i have bottled up tons of feelings for the girl for 2yrs... She was 17 at the time, and you were 21? SHE IS STILL TOO YOUNG! That's ILLEGAL! You cannot be age 18 or more and be with anyone who is not at LEAST 18 years of age. Be careful and get out of this situation now. Do not believe those silly "16 is legal" myths. Either go talk to your District Attorney, or any other licensed attorney and you will discover that this relationship is illegal. Open mouth kissing between your ages could even get you into jail in most areas. I've known guys who went to jail over this sort of thing, as they just didn't know any better. I warned them and they just wouldn't believe it. "16 is legal" they would insist, all the way up until they became registered sex offenders. Why? Cause i knew we clicked well and everything bout us works and works good... But a couple months later after we had started dating she says she just wants to be friends??? WTF? Just friends is a little better. However, someone your age really has no business talking to a 17 year old girl. Give her until when she turns 18, then you can safely associate with her. Ok now i know that everything was going well as far as i knew, apparently i was wrong. I ask her why? and she said i dont know, somthing just tells me to just be friends... But none the less we stoped seeing each other and i had to get away for a while soo i could put myself in check, and i did... But now its been a yr and ive been seeing her around more and more and shes been wanting to race my car with me and my bro. BUT she is starting to look at me like she did befor when we were together??? And feelings are not keeping bottled in and its a hurtin........ Soo i ask you all this, especially the women! How should i go about this?....... Its been a lil over a yr and soo yes? no? maybe? What??? *Gets on knees and begs for options* ... If it has been one year and she is now 18, then go ahead and try to pursue something with this girl. If you are interested enough go and see what happens. If, however, she is not yet 18 I would recommend you stay far away from her. I suppose go and feel things out. There is still a fairly big age difference between 18 and 21, however. Also, hiding/bottling up feelings is never, ever good. Be open and honest about how you feel and what you believe in, otherwise you will not be able to have any form of decent relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tegteg Posted May 26, 2004 Author Share Posted May 26, 2004 Faux: The first time i met her i didnt even know her age and never had seen her befor, and she didnt look 15 at all... But come to find out later she was 15... Yes i know 17 isnt "leagl" but owell, i was goin to wait till 18 but she made the move that nite and i said ahh F it.... And that was it... Yeah maybe for my sake i shoulda pulled away and not even hang out with her and make her feel like $h*t even more.... But im not one to ALWAYS play it safe.... Its just like me racing my car, i know that theres plenty of danger to get me into lots of trouble, but i dont stay away from it, i take it as it comes..... Well as for the age diff. between me being 22 and her being 18.... I dont think its a big diff at all.... i have a friend that 18 dating a 30y/o.... another thats 28 dating a 18y/o........ the age diff. thing i dont belive in... theres 11yrs diff between my parents... And yes i know times change, but thats not what were talkin bout..... Well for some ppl its not good to bottle up feelings... But thats how ive had to learn and live my life with the things ive been through, its what works for me... CEPT this time with her i cant seem to keep them bottled up... Why? i dun know, maybe cause i love her? thats the only thing i can think of..... But overall good advise.... TY :bow: DG Link to post Share on other sites
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