Feels like he doesn´t want to stay in touch?

[Yeahsussu]

Me and my BF broke up about 10 months ago. We´ve had a lot of contact after that, especially in the beginning since none of us really wanted to break up, but he felt we couldn´t be together because of the long distance relationship we were about to have.

 

Lately we haven´t had that much contact, which is pretty normal I guess considering we broke up about 10 months ago. I know I´m not his first priority anymore.

 

But I just get the feeling that he doesn´t want to stay in touch with me anymore. When i text him it takes him several days before he replies, and then he just have some bad excuse for not replying earlier. He pretty much treats me like I never existed. Any guys here that can tell me why he acts like that?

 

I´m not trying to be clingy or anything, just texts him once in a while to see how he and his family are doing and if he´s found a new job yet etc. Just random conversation really.

 

I mean, he should be glad I´m still talking to him, cause he treated me quite crap in the end (he had something going on with someone else, not physically, but mentally if I can put it that way). I don´t wanna cause any drama and put him against the wall about why he´s not texting me back etc, but I just wish he could be man enough to tell me what´s going on.

[69ways]

Me and my BF broke up about 10 months ago. We´ve had a lot of contact after that, especially in the beginning since none of us really wanted to break up, but he felt we couldn´t be together because of the long distance relationship we were about to have.

 

Lately we haven´t had that much contact, which is pretty normal I guess considering we broke up about 10 months ago. I know I´m not his first priority anymore.

 

But I just get the feeling that he doesn´t want to stay in touch with me anymore. When i text him it takes him several days before he replies, and then he just have some bad excuse for not replying earlier. He pretty much treats me like I never existed. Any guys here that can tell me why he acts like that?

 

I´m not trying to be clingy or anything, just texts him once in a while to see how he and his family are doing and if he´s found a new job yet etc. Just random conversation really.

 

I mean, he should be glad I´m still talking to him, cause he treated me quite crap in the end (he had something going on with someone else, not physically, but mentally if I can put it that way). I don´t wanna cause any drama and put him against the wall about why he´s not texting me back etc, but I just wish he could be man enough to tell me what´s going on.

 

He sounds not sure i believe and playing hard to get.

 

How long did u date him?

[Yeahsussu]

He sounds not sure i believe and playing hard to get.

 

How long did u date him?

 

We were together for a bit more than 2 years. One year of that was a long distance relationship, and then I moved over to his place. Due to visas and stuff I had to move back home, and since it was hard for him to have a LDR (and for me too!) he didn´t wanna go through it again. Therefore the relationship ended.

[norajane]

He's drifting away from you, like most people drift apart after they break up. Frankly, most guys have little interest in staying friends after a break up.

 

So, basically, he's moving on. As should you. You don't need him to be "man enough to tell you what is going on". You need to be "woman enough" to accept the relationship is over.

[Yeahsussu]

He's drifting away from you, like most people drift apart after they break up. Frankly, most guys have little interest in staying friends after a break up.

 

So, basically, he's moving on. As should you. You don't need him to be "man enough to tell you what is going on". You need to be "woman enough" to accept the relationship is over.

 

Yeah I guess you´re right, I need to accept that the relationship is over. I feel like I´m quite over him, but I still have a bit more to go.

 

He is very close with his other ex, which was a bit weird for me in the beginning, but I knew that there wasn´t anything between them anymore. So I wonder why he won´t stay in touch with me then?

 

But wouldn´t it at least be cool to answer my question about how he´s doing and what he´s been up to lately? I mean we text maybe once a month nowadays, so I´m not trying to be clingy or anything.. Or maybe I should just drop it, but I can´t help find it a bit rude, after all we´ve been through and how close we once were.

[norajane]

Yeah I guess you´re right, I need to accept that the relationship is over. I feel like I´m quite over him, but I still have a bit more to go.

 

He is very close with his other ex, which was a bit weird for me in the beginning, but I knew that there wasn´t anything between them anymore. So I wonder why he won´t stay in touch with me then?

 

But wouldn´t it at least be cool to answer my question about how he´s doing and what he´s been up to lately? I mean we text maybe once a month nowadays, so I´m not trying to be clingy or anything.. Or maybe I should just drop it, but I can´t help find it a bit rude, after all we´ve been through and how close we once were.

 

It's is because there is nothing between them anymore that they can be friends.

 

He probably knows that you still have feelings, and that is awkward for him so he would rather not communicate.

[Yeahsussu]

It's is because there is nothing between them anymore that they can be friends.

 

He probably knows that you still have feelings, and that is awkward for him so he would rather not communicate.

 

So basically I should just lay low. But I´m just making random conversation, nothing about us or our relationship.

 

But yeah, if I picture myself in his shoes it would probably feel a bit awkward. It´s been almost 4 days now since I sent a text, and he hasn´t replied. It feels like it should always be on his terms, we text when HE wants to, we email when HE wants to etc.

[Kamila]

Innocent texting doesn't exist. There is always an ulterior motive (or there isn't, because i haven't thought about it yet).

My ex-bf also wanted to maintain contact after our break-up, I did a bit in the beginning, but then I thought he was just hanging onto me because he was feeling lonely.

Maybe he wanted to get back together ? If he wanted that, he should have been more clear about it.

He kept texting till 12 months after the break-up. And guess what, a couple of months later he had a new girl (found out through FB).

Imagine if I had been texting him for a year and started considering him as a friend and then finding out he's dating ?

Freaky situation.

Start going no contact is my advice. If you keep hanging onto him, you'll get hurt in the end.

If he really wanted to be with you, he'll tell you, he'll be crystal clear about it.

If he's a shy person and doesn't know how to make it clear to you, well then he has some communication skills to improve.

But yeah, no contact must be applied here.

Do it for yourself.